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Relationship between male and female porn addicts.
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addictionbreaker:
Hello everyone!
I'm posting here out of curiosity to see the problem from a wider perspective, so please feel free to share your thoughts and experiences.
There are countless videos on YouTube with guys confessing about their addiction and telling about their recovery, but hardly ever you can see any woman.
Males and females are wired differently when it comes to sex I believe, but what about the addiction itself? Do females really spend hours watching porn, switching clips, with multiple tabs open, edging, masturbating? Does their taste escalate to more shocking stuff? Are they willing to act out the stuff that they find in porn arousing?
There is also a personal side to that question. I will gladly see that topic from the female perspective. The relationship between male and female porn addict.
I was in love with a woman who once confessed to me that she is "somehow addicted to sex" and that she watches "erotic movies". Although she bragged about her libido, in real life she was very shy, uncomfortable and wasn't really interested in anything physical (although she confessed that she was fantasising about me and that she wanted to have sex with me). She didn't know that I was a porn addict and the relationships eventually didn't work out.
Maybe she was scared just like me (I have PIED). Maybe women also have their sexual dysfunctions caused by PMO? I guess a relationship between both addicts could be really a tough one, especially when both parties are rewiring. What are your toughs about it? Do you think both addicted parties could have a fulfilling sex life?
joepanic:
This is in response to the 2nd part of your post
I think given time and understanding 2 addicts could easily form a loving emotional and physical relationship I say time because we addicts know that it is not only resetting the brain for 90 days that is needed but digging much deeper into our lives to understand why we fell into the porn addiction nightmare to begin with and working through those issues. Of course with this comes waiting for your partner to work through theirs if you have gotten yours "fixed" up 1st
Than there is the other issue of this As someone who has beaten the addiction and has moved on to working out the issues of why i fell into that nightmare I have come to the realization(and this is going to be very unpopular) that the way my partner lives her life and the dynamic it creates in our relationship was a small part to me turning to porn. I really noticed this as my brain cleared over time. Will I tell her she is to blame ? Not a chance. What I am doing is working on ways to cope with the challenges that come with any relationship in much more positive and constructive manner. This could be even more challenging when both people are addicts and may find that their partner in some small way contributed to their addiction. I am of course not saying that all relationships fall under this catagory but it is of course theoretically possible. At the end of the day I believe it is most important to get your 90 days in and clear and reset your brain than the real work begins as we all know
cheers
Post often it helps me it helps you
addictionbreaker:
Thanks for sharing your insights. That's very true. The process of healing goes well beyond the 90 day streak.
kzachar1:
I think I answer yes to all the questions you asked regarding women. I guess that’s why I feel so alone cuz sometimes I feel like I’m the only woman who views porn like “how a man does.” Today it was so graphic and I feel terrible about it.
Gambitchco:
Female use of porn, however, was associated with improved sexual quality.
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