Bunnys ascend to madness Journal

[Bunny]

here goes again.

Day 5.

Spiraled down thru bad habits and dumb choices again. Did some thinking and deleted. blocked and what ever way possible to remove myself from the massive stream of pictures and such elements.

Know its not the end and in any attempts there are fails. Did not give up on this and waited a few days before getting back here.

found a pr0n blocker im using now. Removed myself from every facebook group that have some kinda trigger. Searched the drives for any left over thing and purged everything. In any case i need to get my shit together and i found doing this helps in some way.

Gotta fall some times to learn i guess and i did this time.

[jixu]

Sometimes it takes awhile to get going-hope you are staying engaged and committed to the battle.  Like you said, the key is not giving up.  Glad you did the social media purge-take care!

[LetItGoAlready]

found a pr0n blocker im using now. Removed myself from every facebook group that have some kinda trigger. Searched the drives for any left over thing and purged everything. In any case i need to get my shit together and i found doing this helps in some way.

Sounds like you're doing all the right things to get you back on track, Bunny. Keep going!

[Bunny]

Been awhile since i've been here. Had a bad relapse again. Funny how it follows. When im off the pr0n i find it easier to stay away from alcohol and drugs. When i relapse it stacks up fast and i find myself fucked from morning to evening on the daily again.

had to pick myself up. So i have quit beer now, nearly quit the drugs.  Jumped on clean food and meditation. Nearly a month sober and healthy living. The drugs are harder to quit but slowly getting off.

I feel so empty everytime i end up there.  Just sitting in a messy home with all responsibilities pushed past tomorrow. Donno why i want to live like that. Just fucked up and numb awaiting the next sip,hit or fap

Anyways. Im back on track and slowly working my way out of the hole.

Hope you doing good on your own journey .

Peace.

[jixu]

Bunny, nice to see you have returned-good decision!   Hope you can stay on track and stay in touch here.  I noticed before that you were benefiting from some outdoor walks-hope you can keep something like that going.  I can relate to what you said about pushing responsibilities off until tomorrow.  I think the stuff (substance abuse, porn, procrastination, etc) is all interconnected.  Take care!