Author Topic: I can´t be free  (Read 327 times)

Uraz_157

  • Member

  • Offline
  • *

  • 1
    • View Profile
I can´t be free
« on: August 31, 2020, 04:04:25 PM »
Sorry for my English, I'm from Mexico. First of all, thanks to you for creating this forum and sharing your experiences, I hope that I can once again control this addiction to pornography and compulsive masturbation that has plagued me for 12 years. I do not want to go too long with details of my childhood and adolescence, I will only say that I have always been quite an introverted, insecure and anxious person; I had the misfortune to come across pornography at the age of 11 (I saw photos of naked women, without masturbating, breasts caught my attention) and became addicted when I had my first girlfriend and I instinctively discovered masturbation at 17 (since then doing it sometimes from one to four times a day, or not enduring periods of abstinence greater than a week). Fortunately, a couple of years after starting this addiction, I met a second girl, with whom I share a relationship that is nice and beautiful until now, but despite that, I have not been able to get rid of this vice. A couple of years ago, I decided to take psychological treatment for a few months and I confessed to my partner my problem, she understood me and supported me. Since then I have improved considerably, I stopped masturbating for a longer time (between two weeks and a month) and I enjoyed sex with my partner better. The problem is that I am currently tempted to masturbate, in the first instance because I feel that I have become less patient, it often gives me anxiety about my work (I am a perfectionist) and the family routine.
In addition, I usually have some kinds of headaches in the temples, I tend to move my jaw to crack the bones and relieve pain, like a kind of nervous tic. So I am relapsing again into compulsive masturbation and pornography, I have erotic fetishes (gender bender, transsexual, etc ...). I know that the only one who deceives himself is me, and that I am destroying myself in silence, in addition to putting my relationship and family at risk, but I can't find a way out of this. Sometimes I play sports and that helps a lot, but I feel like the stress of everyday life and these withdrawal symptoms overwhelm me. Thanks and hopefully you can guide me.
« Last Edit: August 31, 2020, 04:16:28 PM by Uraz_157 »

mousemat1

  • Member

  • Offline
  • ****

  • 468
    • View Profile
Re: I can´t be free
« Reply #1 on: August 31, 2020, 04:54:26 PM »
Hi Uraz

Spend some time reading the advice from other addicts here. Post your thoughts as often as you can because it can help you focus on your goal of beating porn addiction. It's not important if people don't reply to posts. Just writing how you feel is good therapy.

Good luck!

Psyc Ops

  • Member

  • Offline
  • **

  • 87
    • View Profile
Re: I can´t be free
« Reply #2 on: August 31, 2020, 09:08:03 PM »
You have to surrender to being human.  It's not so bad.  You just need to own yourself.  You are just us.  You are just a human being. 
We are who we are. 

No te rindas contigo mismo. Tenemos que aprender quiénes somos. Quiénes somos no es perfecto, pero está bien. Solo necesitas entender quién eres. Eres igual que todos nosotros. Solo necesitas ser dueño de ti mismo. Necesitas tener el control de ti mismo y estarás bien. No se desesperen. Vas a estar bien. Promesa.

Paz.

Vas a estar bien.

Es hora de seguir adelante