Author Topic: How to regain confidence?  (Read 284 times)

jasonsteakums70

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How to regain confidence?
« on: January 04, 2021, 03:19:39 AM »
I have PIED and I’m 140+ days into NoFap. It’s had its benefits for sure. I’m not on hard mode as I live with my girlfriend. We’ve been together a long time and don’t have as much sex as we did during the honeymoon phase. When we do, I’m able to do it successfully. But before this, I, like most of you, struggled with erections.

Regardless of this long and successful streak AND the fact that I’m mostly successful during sex, what plagues me is a lack of confidence. When I was younger (I’m now 29) I was erect before my pants even came off. There was never really a situation where a girl had to get me hard. I was just hard. These days it’s a gradual build-up in sexual situations and my penis is slower to rise to the occasion and this has created such a confusing adjustment for me to navigate...and it’s been this way for years.

Honestly, some days are much better than others though (morning wood and easily induced erections). Those are usually the days we end up having sex. But on what seems like most days, I won’t have morning wood and my penis will feel extremely slow to respond to anything. Because of this, I’ll rarely initiate sex but I’ll go for it when she’s feeling it. There is no sexual ‘aggressor’ in me anymore as I’m too preoccupied with thinking there’s a chance that something will go wrong if I’ve literally gone days without a boner.

The question then becomes, are my expectations too high? How exactly do I become more initiative when it comes to sex if I’m not always 1000% positive things will work downstairs? Do I continue to just wait it out in hopes things will improve with the streak?
« Last Edit: January 04, 2021, 03:22:28 AM by jasonsteakums70 »

Aladdin

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Re: How to regain confidence?
« Reply #1 on: January 10, 2021, 11:30:28 AM »
I think you have to be kind with your self and start train your mind to be positive thinker , confidence is the key to great sex , I suffered from it a lot and now I'm try to control my thought so I feel more greater than the past .

jasonsteakums70

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Re: How to regain confidence?
« Reply #2 on: January 12, 2021, 01:01:21 AM »
I think you have to be kind with your self and start train your mind to be positive thinker , confidence is the key to great sex , I suffered from it a lot and now I'm try to control my thought so I feel more greater than the past .

You’re definitely right about this. I’m a little anxious in general and my confidence could use some work. Any suggestions of or youtubers, books, or anything that helped you personally?

CapoReboot

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Re: How to regain confidence?
« Reply #3 on: January 13, 2021, 01:02:41 AM »
I agree with Aladdin.

Aladdin

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Re: How to regain confidence?
« Reply #4 on: January 15, 2021, 12:08:21 PM »
Try & try & try that is the best way until u success

Jeks

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Re: How to regain confidence?
« Reply #5 on: January 15, 2021, 01:10:54 PM »
Do I continue to just wait it out in hopes things will improve with the streak?

I'd say yes. You have already seen improvements. Its a combination of Patience and Rewiring. When you feel like you have got to try a new strategy, try to do hardmode for a while, if its possible. Other than that i would stay away from masturbation completely, if you are not already doing so (at least for while) and see what that does for you. Only be sexual active with your partner. Other than that, just stay on the path, be patient, be kind to yourself.