Struggling...

[TNM1978SLT]

Hi Everyone,
Its been over a year since I last posted on here and I'm sorry to say that I have relapsed.
I am now 9 days since I last "acted out" whilst watching porn.
Not really sure what I'm asking for on here but writing it down seems to quell some of the thoughts associated with acting out.
I'm a married father and don't want to still using porn when my children grow up.
I think the difficulty is that as with other addictions, there are "tells" e.g. being drunk or high with alcohol or drug addiction. With this addiction there are no signs and nobody would know whether I've watched porn or not. How do others manage this?
Think I might need some moral support form others on here who are or have been in a similar position.
Thanks

[jixu]

You are doing the right thing.  Don't be overly hard on yourself.  How has it been going lately?  Your kids are worth all the efforts you are making.   

[MosesY]

There are "Tells" for porn addicts as well, they are just more subtle. A porn addict normally looks at women with lust in his eyes which is very obvious to the women. It is subconscious and the man is unaware he does it. I would encourage you to write in this journal every day. I put a counter app on my phone called "Clean TIme Counter" that helps me to visualize myself being free from porn. ALso reward yourself for every week you don't use porn with a nice meal, a cigar, a good bottle of scotch, or something similar.

[Skins23]

We’re all here for you!  You’re not alone in this.  Thanks for posting. 

[cranm329]

We’re all here for you!

Seconded

[Rookie]

Tell me about the struggle, I went 9 days straight a couple of weeks ago, and then haven't gone more than 3 days since. The struggle is real.
I spend way too much time at home alone, I have to find past times that are outside the house.

I am not, however, giving up. I remember the days before the internet. Life was so full of activities, and things getting done, this has made me so lazy....