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**Forum Rules-Guidelines-Suggestions** / Stats
« on: September 10, 2020, 10:56:04 PM »
Any way to add in the statistics, how many people have viewed my journal per day? When ever you check your stats,  I would appreciate seeing each day, how many have read it.

You have that option in Blogspot in the dashboard for instance, it's very encouraging seeing the views you get and it pushes you do keep going.

Ages 40 and up / New Start
« on: April 04, 2020, 07:42:06 PM »

This is the first time in about a year that I post here. I fell off the band wagon, hard...thankfully, it remained vanilla and digital. That being said, I was telling my self, I wasn't going to post here till it was at least 1 day more than my previous streak (9 days). Well, finally accomplished 15 days today. And I wasn't that tempted today, however, wife was in the mood...longest orgasm in years...even she noticed...

What has contributed to my streak? Being a Christian, and the events with Covid 19 going around, and being somewhat of a conspiracy theorist...scared be, gave me huge anxiety. And it doesn't help that I watched a couple of youtube videos made by Qanon...I saw disturbing images that I will never be able to erase from memory.

Thankfully, no humans were hurt, just very, very sick art.

All that to say, I'm not preaching to anyone here, but as far as I'm concerned, God definitely used these events to tell me "ok, you have indulged long enough...time to come back". I keep praying every day that he doesn't let me PMO far, 15 days, longest streak in years, and really, not that tempted....yet.

My issue, is that when I'm intimate with my wife, I often suffer from premature ejaculation. Sometimes, I would be under 2 minutes. We can all agree, my wife was probably faking it.

As of late, I seem to last longer, but I'm wondering if porn can cause it. I'm not sure why, I was sometimes edging for nearly 1 hr when watching porn or, playing online porn games. Delayed as much as I could, till time was getting tight for responsibilities.

Ages 40 and up / Not sure where to start
« on: February 20, 2019, 09:43:41 PM »
Found this place as most did, by finding YBOP due to some concerns of possible ED.
Only cracked into my 40's (42). Married to an extremely beautiful wife (looks like Kristen Bell and built like her too). I didn't think I was addicted to porn, since I could go days without PMO. Depending on how busy my life was. I NEVER look for ways out of work, or social activities to find P. Other activities will ALWAYS come before.

PMO was ALWAYS my last resort, if I was either bored and if I knew it was going to be days till my next sexual episode with my wife. I went to the gym regularly, till I hurt my knees and tailbone. Now, I can't even do 2 squats without knee pain. So you might say, the exercise, is non existent.
I was thinking this may be part of the problem, that my heart is not necessarily failing, but I'm not in shape like I was.

My erections are not as strong as they were. Though my wife gives me a compliment on the hardness (I'm not sure if she's trying to encourage a moderately hard penis to being harder, or if it actually is).  I have only been able to not orgasm twice in our 14 yr marriage that I can remember while having sex.

Now the hard part, she's been on SSRI's for almost 4 yrs, which is killing her emotional side, sex drive is all but gone. Sex is only once a month now (or less), and my sex drive is still high (with weak erections till orgasm, which at that point, it's hard). And I'm starting to either suffer from premature ejaculation, or, the sex has been so random and infrequent, that it doesn't last long anymore. I have seen as little as 3 - 5 minutes and done (not including foreplay).

I was always able to hold out on PMO if I suspected we were going to have sex within the next few days (last time was Feb 18th for PMO) and I have no doubt I can hold out till Feb 22 - 24th (she's on her period and hinted at sex).

Now, with all that said, here's my question, that after reading a few other posts, I always thought, that if I PMO'd to keep it "fresh" and only hold out masturbation till a couple of days before sex, so it would last was the way to keep our sex episodes lasting longer, I'm starting to think I had the wrong approach.

I have to admit, it's refreshing to see I'm not the only one struggling with this addiction (I might be less frequent than some, I'm usually under an hour when I do PMO) but it's still stronger than I am at times.

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