j7ll7
Member
Hi guys,
I'm writing here because I have reset my counter. I have relapsed after 180 days of reboot. I've not thrown myself into a binge. But in the last two weeks I've orgasmed (not masturbation) to porn fantasy. My long lasting flatline has ended and now I feel the full force of my sexual desire. But I don't see it as something bad. I merely feel like I've entered a new stage of reboot. I was a bad case.
I've been masturbating to porn since age 12 and discovered internet porn 1 year later. Since that time I've used internet porn for 2 or more times a day, every day. I'm now 24, that means that for my entior sexually active life the only thing I've conditioned my sexuality to was internet porn. I've never had any succesfull sexual relationship with a person before. Now that I'm 180 days in I finally feel some of the feelings come back that I lost in all that time.
I do think I have a long way to go before I'm able to have sex. But at least I'm on the right track. Maybe now that I have the feeling of my sexuality back, my improvements will be a lot quicker. I don't know, only the future will tell me. But the reason I'm starting this new journal is because this feeling is totally new to me. And just like the beginning of the first one I can use your support to help me through these challenging times.
I'm not regretting resetting my counter and looking forward to the following months. Thx in advance for all the messages, support and wisdom. You guys are the best and have helped my life in many more ways than you can even imagine.
Cheers,
Jelle
I'm writing here because I have reset my counter. I have relapsed after 180 days of reboot. I've not thrown myself into a binge. But in the last two weeks I've orgasmed (not masturbation) to porn fantasy. My long lasting flatline has ended and now I feel the full force of my sexual desire. But I don't see it as something bad. I merely feel like I've entered a new stage of reboot. I was a bad case.
I've been masturbating to porn since age 12 and discovered internet porn 1 year later. Since that time I've used internet porn for 2 or more times a day, every day. I'm now 24, that means that for my entior sexually active life the only thing I've conditioned my sexuality to was internet porn. I've never had any succesfull sexual relationship with a person before. Now that I'm 180 days in I finally feel some of the feelings come back that I lost in all that time.
I do think I have a long way to go before I'm able to have sex. But at least I'm on the right track. Maybe now that I have the feeling of my sexuality back, my improvements will be a lot quicker. I don't know, only the future will tell me. But the reason I'm starting this new journal is because this feeling is totally new to me. And just like the beginning of the first one I can use your support to help me through these challenging times.
I'm not regretting resetting my counter and looking forward to the following months. Thx in advance for all the messages, support and wisdom. You guys are the best and have helped my life in many more ways than you can even imagine.
Cheers,
Jelle