120 days without P

Today is my 121st day without P. Since late February I haven?t watched any kind of P. During the first 3 months I only had a couple of MO sessions. The longest I was ever able to go on hard mode was 48 days. Now I no longer see the hard mode as a priority since I never had any significant ED. But there?s a more important reason for this change in attitude: over the last 30 days I noticed that my P memories have faded almost completely. I guess this is because 30 days ago I decided to drastically limit all kinds of sexual fantasies as well as prevent all kinds of O, including wet dreams.

Although I?ve come to believe that brief fantasizing about women that you?ve seen in real life is natural, I don?t dwell on their images for long and I don?t fight them too hard either. I know that past generations have been doing so and they were fine. The few P flashbacks that I have from time to time I brush away firmly. In the early stages of my recovery, the harder I fought P flashbacks, the harder they fought me. So at the time I would just let them flow away by themselves. Now it?s different. Now I can afford to fight them hard and they basically can?t. They?re surrendering. They?re becoming faded and distant. No more urges! They all went away in a rather short period of time.



WHAT HELPED ME ON MY JOURNEY


Simply the notion that I'm moving into uncharted land is what kept me going and still is. The promise that something new is going to happen. When you relapse you go back to the same old place. The all too familiar place. No more moving in circles!

Another essential part of my recovery was the control of wet dreams. It turns out that 35 days without them brought me to a place I didn't even hope to reach at this time. They used to be frequent and very hard to prevent. But I did it. I went five weeks without them and I am a new man. I know they?re natural but for me they were a problem since they always meant a sharp rise in my urges to watch P (they started the chaser effect like nothing else). They were always the reason why I would relapse. Now I feel with certainty that over the past months I have trained the region in the brain that can control them. Some 10 days into this experiment of NoWetDreams, when I was asleep, I was dreaming sexy stuff and I felt the sensation that it?s too late. An alarm rang in my head in the middle of my dream. The dream turned lucid and I held tight and prevented the O without waking up. When I woke up 10 seconds later my underwear was dry. Such a sense of victory!

Last night I decided to have 3 sessions of MO. Sometime in the future, once I'm done with my exams and my dissertation and once I have a stable job, I will try to go 90 days without wet dreams, without M, without O, without sex, and I'll let you know of the results. I can confirm that the Taoists are right. Life without O strengthens your health, mind. It gives you unlimited energy and makes you very attractive to the opposite sex. In fact it makes you as attractive as a person can get.

However, you need to be in good spirits and a happy person, be fulfilled and in good terms with yourself, otherwise this will translate into an accumulation of negative energy that will torture you at a spiritual level, despite your physical health. 

In the early stages cold showers helped a lot. Now I don't find them that necessary anymore.

I also exercise. I like push ups and walking over long distances.

I really feel like I won the war against porn but at the same time I know that my recovery is not complete. I barely scratched the surface of what's ahead of me. Or at least that's how I feel.
   


BENEFITS SO FAR

When I look at myself in shop windows I am surprised at how healthy I have become. Used to be underweight. Now I don't recognize myself. Physical energy is higher than ever before. Although mentally I'm still not what I want to be. I'm still lazy and lose focus easily. Keeping myself motivated is still hard, even though I have the next few years planned out.

Women's interest in me is at an all time high.   


SEE YOU SOON!

Wow, this is super. Very happy to hear of your success. I am on my journey there and will reach the other side soon too. I agree, I am also very thin and underweight now, but I know I will have my good features back and be attractive once this is over. All the best mate !! Cheers !!

demetriusvii said:

Wow, this is super. Very happy to hear of your success. I am on my journey there and will reach the other side soon too. I agree, I am also very thin and underweight now, but I know I will have my good features back and be attractive once this is over. All the best mate !! Cheers !!

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Keep it up! These are just words that we write on this forum but it's really worth it. Everything changes basically. There is a point, that I believe I've reached, where you feel there's no connection between the old you and the new you. 

Indeed this thing consumes you alive. I've always had a healthy appetite. Always had rich and diverse meals; I tend to spend on cuisine more than most people. Yet it always felt like I was eating holograms.

If you're having a hard time quitting, don't work yourself too hard. Just make sure that you cut back. I've been trying since November and this is the sort of approach that I took. First I wanted to do all at once but didn't work. As long as you cut back statistically, you're on the right path. In my case setting deadlines made things worse.

Congrats on your success! It's very motivating to read such stories.

I have the same problem with wet dreams that you had. Could you explain further how you did achieve the control or simply absence of them? One WD really feels like a huge setback I am exposed to without wanting it.

This has been going on for months and I can't figure it out myself! Thanks for the help.

Carpenter said:

Congrats on your success! It's very motivating to read such stories.

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Thank you!

Carpenter said:

I have the same problem with wet dreams that you had. Could you explain further how you did achieve the control or simply absence of them? One WD really feels like a huge setback I am exposed to without wanting it.

This has been going on for months and I can't figure it out myself! Thanks for the help.

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I guess it takes some practice but the main thing is to convince your brain that this is good for you. You want to tell your brain that no matter what, it's what you really want. Tell that to your brain repeatedly. Although the discomfort may be more than you're used to after 10-15 days, tell yourself that this is good and necessary and imperative. Tell that to it constantly; that it's necessary, no matter what, that it's everything you want. And it will start to listen. Repetition is key. In your mind. No need to use words. Just remind yourself of your wish, especially before going to bed.

Your brain will eventually prioritize it. You have to command over it, and say you want it like it was worth billions of dollars. You have to clearly and lucidly tell yourself that you want this to be above everything else. You may experience superficial sleep, waking up in the middle of the night for no reason etc. The brain will be programmed to avoid the 'danger' and will constantly readjust your body functions in respect to your most express request (it will modify functions that may interfere with your goal). Tell yourself that you want it even if it will kill you (although it won't, don't worry. There's many young females out there who have trouble reaching O and haven't had one in years).

The good news is that while on NoWDs, I almost felt like I didn't need to sleep and eat. Every morning I felt energetic, confident, focused, ready for my academic work even if I had 3 hours of sleep.

If the brain hears something for long enough, it will adopt that information for the subconscious. I repeat: repetition is key. Although the body is not used to thing kind of stress, it can adapt perfectly over time. So try to go 2 weeks, then 4, 8 and so on (or whatever numbers you prefer) until you feel like you have full control over the issue. Promise yourself some sex sessions or some MO sessions for every milestone reached. The brain likes that and will cooperate with you more. What the brain doesn't like is uncertainty, lack of goals etc. You will need to tell it exactly how long you want to go without Os and the brain will listen and start to prepare the road ahead immediately. It needs to have your final plan in check, the goal clearly formulated so that it will be able to optimize different processes in your body for the longer term. If you don't formulate a specific plan (say 4 weeks), you will fail.

The mind is such a powerful tool. The brain and the body functions are moldable, changable. It's all about habit and repetition. Repetition is key. We can adapt to anything. Current medicine disregards mind training to a great extent. We are told that we have no control over our bodily functions and we believe it. And because we believe it, we don't. You have to believe it and want it very badly to be and it will happen. it sounds silly but after two weeks I already felt that I was in control. Before that, when going to bed I would say 'DON'T YOU DARE TO DO THAT AGAIN, DON'T!' But then I soon felt like a switch appeared in my head. It's very hard to explain how it feels. Like I was getting guarantees from my brain saying: 'Don't sweat it, I got it, don't worry anymore. Here's what I have for you, I updated the system'. A kind of 'on and off switch' for wet dreams that I check before falling asleep. Or, to put it more accurately, a red light and a green light for wet dreams that I can turn on and off. During the 5 weeks of the experiment I only kept the light turned to red and it worked. I did it for training/wiring purposes. I wanted the brain to wire properly to this red light thing and I wanted to make sure that I will not lose this ability but instead strengthen it. Even during the last night of the experiment, after 5 weeks of no O, I felt very confident and knew with deep certainty that if I want it to not happen, it's not going to let it happen.

Wet dreams are nothing new to me. I've been experimenting with abstinence since the age of 18. Now I'm 25. Maybe these years of experience meant something. The brain got sick of the sensation perhaps. I got sick of the weakness and brain fog (used to have many of them). Also, maybe the brain has learnt a variety of different sensations that precede a WD and is better equipped to warn me.

Keep in mind that you many want sexual fantasies kept at a minimum, especially before bed and while in bed. That's what I did.

Beware of the full moon. That's when you need to be more cautious. In the days leading up to a full moon, you might feel all the negativity and pessimism that you are capable of feeling. It's a thing of the 'it's darkest and coldest before dawn' sort. After the full moon I feel much better.

Hope this helped. Experiment on your own and see what you can discover. See what works for you and what doesn't.

You said: The brain and the body functions are moldable, changable. It's all about habit and repetition.

this is totally true. It is about reducing exposure. That way we think less p.

Thank you Arcturus! That is unexpectedly much information.

I have never really believed that controlling one's brain through the thoughts is possible in a such a degree. Maybe I have been doing it just the wrong way the whole time. I was more like: 'Please don't do it tonight, come on it isn't necessary.' But I was never convinced that it would actually have any effect on me. In this I created fear and might have even raised the chances.

So I will talk more determinated and courageous to my brain from now on. Maybe it is really possible to influence the subconscious that way.Though I am not quite sure if reminding myself before going to sleep won't be counterproductive and raise the chances to have a WD.
My goal is 5 weeks, let's see if I can get my brain to cooperate with me.

Carpenter said:

I have never really believed that controlling one's brain through the thoughts is possible in a such a degree.

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The brain is a computer and our habits / education (received from parents, society and ourselves) is the operating system. Just like when you're new to your operating system (we humans are), you need need some time to find your way around the settings. Just go to Sex Settings, Abstinence, and click disable wet dreams. That's kind of how it is for me; and it was the first time since puberty that I was able to go for more than 2 weeks.

Good luck. It's worth it. In my case it was the most interesting month of the past 5 years or so. 

Carpenter said:

Though I am not quite sure if reminding myself before going to sleep won't be counterproductive and raise the chances to have a WD.

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By the way... Keep in mind that what works for others may not work for you and vice versa. Just find out what works for you.  Nowadays we have to discover certain things by ourselves. We can no longer rely on scientists to provide us with certain kinds of crucial info; they've fallen behind the pace of present day life. Not to mention the so called sexologists. They seem to teach the exact opposite of what people should do. 

Carpenter said:

My goal is 5 weeks, let's see if I can get my brain to cooperate with me.

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Good luck!

Let me know in 5 weeks how it all went.