New Era - Taking back control of my life!

Hi

I'm a new member of Reboot Nation. I'm fighting against my Porn addiction and I've reading your journals for some time. I think starting my own journal would be useful for me.

Sorry for my English, my native language is Spanish, and I'm still learning English. Any correction or advice is welcome

My story is like this:

I started watching Porn at 13. Now I'm 29 years old, and I've been on porn all of this years. I think it begun to become an addiction at 21, I PMOed almost every day in that time. In the last years (26-29) I PMO 3 or 4 times in a week. PMO sessions could take me even one hour.

At 22 years old I was in a 4 years relationship. Sex was great the first year, but after that i started to lose interest in sex, and it became once-a-month activity (or less). At 27 I started a new relationship, sex was great again... but again after 8 or 10 months I lost interest in sex. My libido was so down whan I was with her, but when I was at home watching porn I was immediately excited. In some times with her I experienced some problems with erection, but never with porn.

Last year I started a new relationship, she's is so sexy, but in our first encounter I had problems with my erection . I started to search in internet about it and i found this page. Videos explaining PIED perfectly fit with my situation. I started to avoid porn for some months and my inproved a lot. But last December I relapsed on porn and my PIED returned.

In 2021 I started my reboot again. I was 11 days clean, but today I relapse again. So I start this diary in the hope that it will help me not to relapse again.

Again, Sorry for my English and for the length of the post. I appreciate any comments or support you can give me. Please feel free to comment! I will try to post every day of my reboot. 

Thanks for reading!

Hey Shaka,

Sorry to hear about your PIED. I suffer from this condition also and it makes me pretty sad. Some advice for your journey: workout daily, remind yourself of why you are quitting porn (to get your life back on track and to cure PIED), and educate yourself on the topic. Read as much as you can about P addiction and how to recover from it. Understanding the science behind the addiction helps tremendously. Best of luck!

Hey Shaka99,

Looks like we both have almost same problems. I really recommend staying away from anything that triggers you, very easy to say but hard to implement. Try to stay away from internet as much as you could, spend time with people, books and meditate.

Meditation has helped me with self-control and attention in the past and I have been seeing positive changes in the last 20 days.

Good luck with your journey.

Day 1:

Avoiding bad thoughts, busy at work. it was a good day, easy

Day 2 & Day 3

I spent the day with my girlfriend (she doesn't know about my P addiction). Sometimes she wants sex, I have told her I am not willing and she is very compressive. She is one of the reasons why I have to get over this. I want to make her happy

greetings to all

Hi

I achieved 23 clean days. Its the greatest time without pmo in my life, since i was young. But then on day 23 I relapsed and the next day relapsed to.

Being clean so many days was great for me, I felt happy, quiet, spending time in some useful things (Work out, Music, reading). Now I am very sad for this relapse.

I have to recover and continue on my way, Now I am no day one again. I have to win this battle. There is no other way.