Im lost and afraid

Hello People,
I seek for advice... It about 1.4 years since I generaly cut porn. When collage started I just wast able to wach porn like I used to - a lot, I was huge PMO/Fantasy - fap guy. Since beggining of adiction I lost my libido to real girls, deppresion, brain fog, social anxiety started to develop. From beggining sex was deppresing, I sow that I had ED.
Time was passing by, porn was leaving my life, but my moods didint changed, I still had all the simptoms of PMO. I used to wach it sometimes, but not regulary or heavy. I fapped fantasized a lot till my dick cuddint stand it even for what. Just before orgasm It was getting hard, and after, instantly went back.
Over those 1.4 years I had some improvements in my ED with girls, but developed ED for fapping. Sex was feelingless, even the oral. I wasnt aroused, just anxious, worry, self observing.
before 46 days I found YBOP and I was amazed by good efects, It was like answer to all my problems. I started and instantly went to flatline, but I didint had much urges before, I was deep in depresion and a lot of stress. Porn was almost gone, but still fucked up fapping, bad sex, depresion and all the symptoms possible. So it was yeasy not to fap at all at those 46 days.
MY story is realy messed up, I dont know what to think, I still on reboot, but Im doughting what my source of problems is porn, even when I have same shit like everybody else here.
What should I do, to relly on reboot, or bury hope about it, and try dealing with my life problems in other way. Im sick of living this hell, all I want is ti be normal..

sumtimes its like do or die!! try working on yoga & meditation!
m with you bro....you can do it !!!
god bless you...

Time was passing by, porn was leaving my life, but my moods didint changed, I still had all the simptoms of PMO. I used to wach it sometimes, but not regulary or heavy. I fapped fantasized a lot till my dick cuddint stand it even for what. Just before orgasm It was getting hard, and after, instantly went back.

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Hi,
it is possible porn changed your brain. For it to change back to the way it was supposed to be, you need to stop porn completely. It doesn't matter if you only used a few times a week or used "soft" material - if you keep using, you probably won't heal.

Since you seem to have strong ED, you should stop masturbation for a few months as well. If you can't do that, cut down the frequency to as little as possible and don't do long sessions, just go for quick releases.

Also when sensitivity is damaged, you need to accept that this takes months to get better and it will be slow. In the meantime do live your life in a meaningful way - sex is not the only thing in the world that is important and for now, you should probably take a break from it to give your body and soul proper time to recover.

Good Luck

Thanks for your responses, founding this and meeting people like you puting my life into more positive way. At those 46 reboot days a lot changed, but I still can rid of my depresion which is probobly slowing me down. I broke with my GF becouse of it, Im lonely staying in my flat most of the time... Im thinking to go to doctor this week, but i dont want to take medicine, so metitation would be the best way, it realy is, to cure my self..

lupusdzd said:

I broke with my GF becouse of it, Im lonely staying in my flat most of the time... Im thinking to go to doctor this week, but i dont want to take medicine, so metitation would be the best way, it realy is, to cure my self..

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Let this be a motiavtion my friend for you not to masturbate to the unreal, non-hearted pixels millions of people are watching daily not realizing that they are sadly ruining themselves .

Anyways , try meditation or just simple breathing exercises or take up a hobby or exercise.
Feel that void porn has caused.
Stay safe and have a great day.

yeah! you are doing great bro. its great to hear to the voice which motivates you....and ultimately it will lead you to the path of purity and peace.
good luck