Author Topic: Free At Last  (Read 57010 times)

BlueHeronFan

  • Member

  • Offline
  • *****

  • 1396
    • View Profile
Re: Free At Last
« Reply #725 on: January 12, 2020, 06:26:59 PM »
Five weeks is awesome! Adding one more day is even better. I think it's so great how you are building this progress one day at a time. That's the way it should be, probably the way it has to be. The way we live today is the way we live our lives, and you've had a good life for 35 days in a row. No reason to stop that!

It's also great that you are pulling yourself back from a period of difficulty. I am not an exercise/nutrition person by any means, but I was reading something a few weeks ago that said it's easier to rebuild muscle after a period of not exercising than to build it from scratch, almost as if our bodies "remember" the muscle mass and have an easier time rebuilding it. I like to think a similar thing works in recovery. Sure, you had a difficult stretch, but you aren't rebuilding from square one. You have a lot of memory stored up that will help your brain and body get back with program faster and stronger than before.

Every day you go clean, your body becomes more your ally and less your enemy through the healing process of recovery. Day by day, you'll get where you're headed. We all will. Keep it up!

Do or die

  • Member

  • Offline
  • *****

  • 1198
  • Personal Text
    Be rebooted and help others to do it.
    • View Profile
Re: Free At Last
« Reply #726 on: January 12, 2020, 09:54:35 PM »
Congratulations Achilles
Its not about stopping. Its about to accept that you are stopped it.

achilles heel

  • Member

  • Offline
  • *****

  • 715
    • View Profile
Re: Free At Last
« Reply #727 on: January 13, 2020, 03:38:11 PM »
Day 36

Thank you, guys!  :)

I am very busy again, just quick my plan for today: No porn!

BlueHeronFan

  • Member

  • Offline
  • *****

  • 1396
    • View Profile
Re: Free At Last
« Reply #728 on: January 13, 2020, 09:16:04 PM »
Busy can be helpful, and it looks like you have a perfect plan for the day! Keep it going!

achilles heel

  • Member

  • Offline
  • *****

  • 715
    • View Profile
Re: Free At Last
« Reply #729 on: January 14, 2020, 04:29:14 PM »
Day 37

Thanks, Blue!

Difficult day, once again there is a clear plan: No porn!

BlueHeronFan

  • Member

  • Offline
  • *****

  • 1396
    • View Profile
Re: Free At Last
« Reply #730 on: January 14, 2020, 09:49:25 PM »
A good plan can really help when it comes to facing difficult days. I'm glad to hear you made it through another one. Keep doing what you're doing and stick to that clear plan.

Day 38 is just a day away!

achilles heel

  • Member

  • Offline
  • *****

  • 715
    • View Profile
Re: Free At Last
« Reply #731 on: January 16, 2020, 12:20:55 PM »
Day 0

I was too busy to relapse, I thought. Taking my cell phone home would be safe by now... I'm really angry at myself. This is just so stupid and it really doesn't help thinking that I am now heading towards 7 years of not getting clean... of relapsing again and again sooner or later...

I have the keys to success, but a few days of taking restrictions too easy is enough already to fall back to day 0.

Have to think about changing strategies, I can't just start again as if nothing happened.

BlueHeronFan

  • Member

  • Offline
  • *****

  • 1396
    • View Profile
Re: Free At Last
« Reply #732 on: January 16, 2020, 08:17:35 PM »
Definitely smart to take some time to reassess and find some adjustments that will help you move in the right direction again. Figure out what's sustainable. Maybe having no devices at home isn't the most sustainable way (because anytime you have a device at home, it will trigger you strongly). I don't know, think about the cues and associations related to relapse and how you can readjust your routines to start associating those cues with new behaviors.

A relapse is definitely frustrating, and I'm sorry to hear it happened. But don't beat yourself up too much for being on this road for 7 years. I'm coming up on 10 years since the first time I actually told someone I had this addiction and started working on it for real. This is about finding a new way to live our whole lives, not just about fixing one problem. A recovery plan that you can't live with every day for the rest of your life is a recovery plan that will fail.

It's just a day at a time, too. Regardless of what happened today, tomorrow is its own thing. Go make it a great day!

Non-Dual Adventurer

  • Member

  • Offline
  • ****

  • 256
    • View Profile
Re: Free At Last
« Reply #733 on: January 18, 2020, 02:31:22 AM »
I recently downloaded Net Nanny, one of the most advanced internet filters on the market.

I pay $45 a year and it blocks all P, no exceptions. SOME P subs slip through but they are so crappy as to honestly not warrant your addicted brain's attention, and it will realise it soon enough.

I can have this program on up to 5 devices, and my wife has the password for it so I can't just disable it.

I would strongly consider downloading this if I were you. I find that sometimes the internet is slow, and sometimes it doesn't work at all, but if I reload the app and/or browser, it usually improves.

Slower internet is a small price to pay for your freedom. So far it is really helping me curb the urges because when I know that P is literally impossible, watching P subs seems soo boring and pointless, that I don't even bother.

Download it and give the log in info to someone you love and trust. Blacklist all of your favourite P sites just in case anything slips through the net. Make sure this person can hold you accountable. They will be able to see every single blocked site and google search, so make sure it is someone you can really trust.

Sure, maybe you might try to still access P for a bit, but this software literally uses AI to comprehend your internet habits and become better. It learns from your fuck-ups and blocks that shit.

Don't take any more chances and give your brain a chance to be free from P.

Trust me, paying $45 for this software and still being able to have your devices in the house without fear is a godsend (for me at least).

Strongly recommend!!!