You are right, things are going well - but I feel like I need to work even harder now and not lower my guards.
You've reached impressive streaks before and you will do again by consistency, just keep fighting!
Oh man i read your journal and im almost at tears. So much dedication, suffering, ups and downs, fighting. You deserve a beautiful life, sir. It's unthinkable to me how much evil and badness is in this porn-related industry. From the youngest age our brains are wired to sex and money. You will never know how many wonderful human beings have been supressed by this addiction. Wish you best luck man.
By the way, how's your date?
Thank you for your constant support, Hablablos!
Things with the girl shift more towards a friends with benefits direction, nothing serious, but that's because I don't want a relationship at the moment and I am honest about it.
Mind if I ask why don't you want a relationship?
When people are looking down the barrel of failure in their lives, they will do whatever it takes to get themselves moving, something, anything, to start climbing upward toward the point of survival. And then, once they get to the point where they’re keeping their heads above water, they start heading back down again. [...]That’s the only reason our lives follow that roller coaster. It’s that simple. As soon as we get away from failure and up past the line of survival, we quit doing the things that got us there. You know what that means? It means you already know how to do everything it takes to make you an outrageous success. That’s how you’ve survived up to this point. And if you can survive, then you can succeed. You don’t need to do some brilliant, impossible thing. You don’t need to learn some insanely difficult skills, or have some genius-level brainstorm of an innovative idea. All you have to do is keep doing the things that got you this far. [...]During those times when I was slipping from survival back toward failure, I had stopped doing those simple daily disciplines. That was the reason—and the only reason—that I kept slipping back into failure. I was making little everyday choices that seemed harmless and innocent enough, but without my realizing it they were pulling me back down toward failure. That’s why my life had felt like that agonizing lament from The Godfather, Part III, when the Al Pacino character says, “Just when I thought I was out, they pull me back in!”
Hello achilles,sorry to hear about your relapse. Just remember that this relapse didn't destroy everything you did and your progress in other areas of your life. You'll get back to your healthy daily routines. Just be careful that you don't start with too many at once. Keep going man.
Four weeks done and I do feel some trouble, but feel like I can handle it... if I look at the last half year I am doing really well at all and have advanced a lot... those four weeks now don't seem like a huge success to me after having reached longer streaks lately, but it is a success! It is so incredibly difficult with porn and porn subs all around to say 'No' every day again... even if there were some setbacks, I definitely live a more fulfilled life already...