Author Topic: That's it, never again!  (Read 31322 times)

Kurall_Creator

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Re: That's it, never again!
« Reply #175 on: June 05, 2017, 07:44:51 AM »
Another day, another dollar!

gymaddict

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Re: That's it, never again!
« Reply #176 on: June 05, 2017, 02:34:19 PM »
Bro.

I have just read/scanned your complete thread.  Congratulations for having the guts to kick a problem common to all men--churched and unchruched.

You are a believer and I am too.  I applaud you on prayer because it really works.  I lead a confidential group of men kicking porn and sex addiction.  I have seen men make tremendous progress in this fight in a group, just as this site and confessing anonymously helps to kick porn.

Several things come to mind.  Covenant Eyes, a porn blocker, might forestall your cravings from becoming a binge session.  You have to select one person who will receive your computer history on a regular basis.  An accountability partner is a real boon to recovery from porn.  He/she should be a person you trust to keep your confidences and secrets confidential. Someone who is walking in sobriety from porn.

Also, there are great books out there from believing authors:  Dr Doug Weiss' book, CLEAN, and another one entitled SEX, MEN AND GOD.

Michael Cusick has written a great recovery book called SURFING FOR GOD.   Both Weiss and Cusick were sex/porn addicts.

If you are a member of a church, you may want to approach your pastor about starting a mens group striving for purity.  Once you immerse yourself in helping other men and learning all that you can about the neuroscience of porn and its effects on our brains, you will realize that helping others is the key to sobriety.  (Dr. Ted Roberts DVD series, "The Conquerer Series" has physicans schooled in addiction that explain the neuroscience of porn addiction and its cravings on our brains as men.)

These are just thoughts.  My prayers are with you man.  Believe me, I understand and know the struggle quite well. 

Kurall_Creator

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Re: That's it, never again!
« Reply #177 on: June 11, 2017, 02:44:15 PM »
Thanks Gym Addict,

I don't think an accountability partner would help me. I'm really learning through looking into my life, is I get extremely stressed when I feel like I'm letting people down, which leads me to feeling completely depressed when I fail, and then I go straight 4 porn.

As I listen to my ebs and flows during prayer, I find myself more capable of dealing with the cravings.

Anyways, I wanted to let everybody know I'm tackling a David J. Ley article and study where it is just men, not being satisfied with their partners that lead 1 out 5 men to use porn to avoid sex, and 28 per cent preferring porn to sex, and that is not a problem!

That is fucked up post modernism, and I'm going for the jugular! Anybody who says shit like that hates traditional relationships and families straight up! I'm am going to pull a copper cab on him and verbally mess him up!!!!

Kurall_Creator

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Re: That's it, never again!
« Reply #178 on: June 12, 2017, 10:16:14 AM »
Hey, guys - I just responded to one of David J. Ley's new studies that prove 'NoFap and Rebooting' is wrong.

https://www.minds.com/blog/view/720992648139120646

Here's a snippet of the blog -

First, let's check out the very beginning of the article.   

Quote
Men who are not sexually satisfied in their relationship are more likely to suffer erectile dysfunction, research suggests. 
 
Porn is often blamed for turning men off sex with their partners, but one in five men watch X-rated films to avoid intimacy, it was found.

First, let's look at the cognitive dissonance of the second sentence, the reason why men are not having sex with women is they are using porn to avoid intimacy. Well, can't you say porn is turning men off sex with their partners? It means the exact same thing!

If I wrote the sentence like this -

Quote
Porn is often blamed for turning men off sex with their partners, AND one in five men watch X-rated films to avoid intimacy, it was found.

doesn't it make complete grammatical sense! They use the word but to say this is exclusionary, when really, in reality, it is not!!!

Kurall_Creator

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Re: That's it, never again!
« Reply #179 on: June 12, 2017, 12:50:46 PM »
https://www.minds.com/newsfeed/721056758075760643 - David J. Ley calls me a misogynist for my blog today!
https://www.minds.com/newsfeed/721055479677067273 - David J. Ley says I am not personally accountable because I choose to get healthy by entering NoFap and Reboot.

Sometimes, the best motivation is to know someone wants you to fail!
« Last Edit: June 12, 2017, 12:54:44 PM by Kurall_Creator »

Kurall_Creator

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Re: That's it, never again!
« Reply #180 on: June 16, 2017, 07:48:19 PM »
This week has been my hardest yet. I don't want to go much into my home life, but it can be very hard at moments. My fiance and I do have mental illnesses, I have depression and she has OCD.

Sometimes I can get overwhelmed. But I am taking the time to breathe deeply, and I remind I do not have to solve the OCD issues. Add to that, my biological family is having health problems, and it's up to me to 'save the day' again. I have taken so many things in stride this week. Hopefully, my life will not be so hectic soon!

Taking a more mindful approach to prayer and life has helped with my porn cravings a lot. Like I said, I know my relapses have a lot to do with the feeling I am letting someone down.

gymaddict

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Re: That's it, never again!
« Reply #181 on: June 17, 2017, 12:34:37 PM »
Saying a prayer for you right now bro for your strength, but more than that His miraculous strength to be your fortress, shield, high tower, and help. 

Kurall_Creator

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Re: That's it, never again!
« Reply #182 on: June 18, 2017, 07:51:31 AM »
Thanks brother!

Things are going great right now. I've been thinking, meditating and praying about how there is condemnation in Christ Jesus for those who walk according to the spirit. I've been vigilant on laying easy on the guilt and shame of things for the past while. Seems to be working.

Thank Fod.

Kurall_Creator

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Re: That's it, never again!
« Reply #183 on: June 20, 2017, 01:32:07 PM »
Everything is starting to look up. New iPad means new work on everything. And I've been thinking about expanding some things I'm doing online. Onward and upward. No more porn for the rest of the year.

Kurall_Creator

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Re: That's it, never again!
« Reply #184 on: June 21, 2017, 07:51:35 AM »
When I had a bit of a porn craving, taking that time to meditate and pray was awesome. I soon didn't even have the craving, and I felt great!

Kurall_Creator

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Re: That's it, never again!
« Reply #185 on: June 22, 2017, 07:08:21 PM »
I'm finding the whole mindful techniques very empowering. The more I accept the emotions I feel, the easier I can manage them. It is definitely a plus.

AndyNJ

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Re: That's it, never again!
« Reply #186 on: June 23, 2017, 05:12:57 AM »
It's great you're using mindfulness, KC.  I've also found it useful.  What I'm doing now is training myself to call it up, so to speak, in those moments when I feel tempted.  It puts the temptation outside of me, and gives me the moment to imagine myself as someone who simply does not use porn.  Mindfulness + reimagining the self. 

Kurall_Creator

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Re: That's it, never again!
« Reply #187 on: June 23, 2017, 03:14:37 PM »
I'm having a great day again!

Tired, but I'm feeling great!

Kurall_Creator

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Re: That's it, never again!
« Reply #188 on: June 24, 2017, 05:36:28 PM »
Another day bites the dust!

Kurall_Creator

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Re: That's it, never again!
« Reply #189 on: June 27, 2017, 10:16:48 AM »
I'm feeling a bit of a craving. I saw a somewhat suggestive picture, so I'm coming here to have something else to do, and then I'm going to practice mindful prayer.

Kurall_Creator

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Re: That's it, never again!
« Reply #190 on: June 29, 2017, 08:19:31 AM »
I'm on a 25 day goal right now. Woot. Things are going so great. Time to hit this out of the park.

Kurall_Creator

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Re: That's it, never again!
« Reply #191 on: June 30, 2017, 01:54:21 PM »
Almost another week under my belt. I'm feeling fantastic.

Kurall_Creator

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Re: That's it, never again!
« Reply #192 on: July 03, 2017, 07:07:05 PM »
Onto week 5. Bring on the victory.

Kurall_Creator

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Re: That's it, never again!
« Reply #193 on: July 07, 2017, 06:35:32 PM »
Almost through week 5.

My fiancé was at her parents for a couple of days, and I made it through without her.

Nothing like having a purpose, for me it is blogging, and discussing things on the internet. I did that, and when I had a couple of cravings, I took a deep breath and meditativly prayed about it, and they passed. Woot. First time I made it through her not being here.

Kurall_Creator

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Re: That's it, never again!
« Reply #194 on: July 10, 2017, 12:27:17 PM »
Onto Week 6, everything is going great. I feel terrific, and everything is working out.

Kurall_Creator

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Re: That's it, never again!
« Reply #195 on: July 11, 2017, 12:18:27 PM »
Boo Yah, almost at 36 days, onto day 37!

I love my life. Anybody who tells you it's all a placebo effect, if you don't spend an hour or more a day on porn, you'll have a more productive time, I can really tell them they are full of shit. I am feeling fantastic. Everything is really working out, and I love my life again.

Onward and upward. I'm writing at least 2 blogs a day right now, I'm doing at least an hour worth of drawing every day as well. My life has never been so amazing right now.

Kurall_Creator

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Re: That's it, never again!
« Reply #196 on: July 15, 2017, 02:37:51 PM »
Almost on day 40, which means almost 6 weeks down. I am feeling a bit stressed though. Thinking about day 42, and 6 weeks, I'm starting to feel nervous. I know it is just a feeling, and that day 42 will be just another day, but I feel like I could cave.

Take a deep breath, relax, and let your mind focus on what you do want.

Kurall_Creator

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Re: That's it, never again!
« Reply #197 on: July 17, 2017, 05:58:38 PM »
Woot, over 6 weeks. This is my second longest streak. Onto the rest of the year.

TakeActionNow

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Re: That's it, never again!
« Reply #198 on: July 17, 2017, 11:16:43 PM »
that's the spirit !!!
Self Worth, Self Respect, Self Love
Purpose before Person

negativity > depression > ACTION > non-self pity > Goals > growth > STRENGTH > REALITY > Attention > Interests > Challenge > Choice > COURAGE > I LOVE MYSELF > Masculinity > UnBlock > selfheal

Kurall_Creator

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Re: That's it, never again!
« Reply #199 on: July 28, 2017, 09:23:45 AM »
I'm almost at 8 weeks now.