Hi all. I've been a long time lurker, and though I've never posted you've all helped me so much. I've struggled with PIED for a long time - I'm 31, and probably have had it for most of the past decade. I could get erect, but found it hard to stay that way long enough for meaningful sex, and though I had a supportive partner the past 1.5 years, it gradually wore her down. In the late summer I learned about PIED and the reboot process. I realised I was in a vicious cycle - my use of porn was causing my ED, and my ED and fear of letting my partner down in sex drove me to porn. So, in late September I started my own reboot.
The process was challenging - the temptation to go online and get myself off was always present in my mind. I would want to bargain with myself, saying things like, "Hey! It's been a week! You deserve to take a peek online." I've PMO'd a handful of times during my reboot (maybe 4 or 5), and each time made me feel regretful afterwards. But, looking at the big picture made me optimistic - I've gone 84 of 88 days without porn.
Some things that helped me during the reboot: I started going to the gym, which is not something I had ever done. Having an outlet like that, and the knowledge that I was actively working to better myself made me feel empowered...something that my ED had robbed me of so often in the past. I also started a new programming course - obviously, this option is particular to me, but maybe trying to do something new and exciting is a good way to go - afterall, you're going to have a lot more free time.
In any case, the end of the story (so far!) is a happy one. It's now day 89, and the difference is incredible. I get rock hard during sex, and stay that way as long as needed. But what's more, I get rock hard from the subtlest interactions with my partner: hugs, kisses, spooning - sometimes even just thinking about her. It's fantastic. Last night we were out for a drink, and she was wearing a low cut top...and that alone was enough to make it very difficult for me to stand up.
Sure I get the occasional pangs of desire and longing for porn. I'm sure I always will. I'm sure I'll slip up. But sex with my girlfriend is better than porn ever felt. Soooo much better. If I could go back in time and tell my old self just one thing, it would be that.
Anyhow, I just wanted to post here to provide some encouragement to all those struggling on here. It's hard. Unbelievably hard. But the results are so utterly worth it. Good luck to everyone, and thanks to you all for changing my life.
The process was challenging - the temptation to go online and get myself off was always present in my mind. I would want to bargain with myself, saying things like, "Hey! It's been a week! You deserve to take a peek online." I've PMO'd a handful of times during my reboot (maybe 4 or 5), and each time made me feel regretful afterwards. But, looking at the big picture made me optimistic - I've gone 84 of 88 days without porn.
Some things that helped me during the reboot: I started going to the gym, which is not something I had ever done. Having an outlet like that, and the knowledge that I was actively working to better myself made me feel empowered...something that my ED had robbed me of so often in the past. I also started a new programming course - obviously, this option is particular to me, but maybe trying to do something new and exciting is a good way to go - afterall, you're going to have a lot more free time.
In any case, the end of the story (so far!) is a happy one. It's now day 89, and the difference is incredible. I get rock hard during sex, and stay that way as long as needed. But what's more, I get rock hard from the subtlest interactions with my partner: hugs, kisses, spooning - sometimes even just thinking about her. It's fantastic. Last night we were out for a drink, and she was wearing a low cut top...and that alone was enough to make it very difficult for me to stand up.
Sure I get the occasional pangs of desire and longing for porn. I'm sure I always will. I'm sure I'll slip up. But sex with my girlfriend is better than porn ever felt. Soooo much better. If I could go back in time and tell my old self just one thing, it would be that.
Anyhow, I just wanted to post here to provide some encouragement to all those struggling on here. It's hard. Unbelievably hard. But the results are so utterly worth it. Good luck to everyone, and thanks to you all for changing my life.
