Author Topic: 18 year old walking the narrow road  (Read 1265 times)

Pas spécial

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18 year old walking the narrow road
« on: March 11, 2015, 09:28:40 AM »
I'm an 18 year old Spanish guy living in London.

Since I discovered porn at the age of 11, fapping progressively became a well implemented habit in my life, which I believe has harmed good part of my teenage experience. I used to waste loads of spare time just edging and watching porn and mostly hentai.

Funnily enough, I have the intent to live a productive and creative live, I really want to workout and practice meditation regularly, read as much as I can, get out of my comfort zone, etc. I want the stuff that really makes you feel good for long lasting time and makes you release dopamine in a healthy and natural way. The activities we are evolutionary prepared to face, that our cavemen ancestors could have done as well.  Nevertheless with today’s internet, videogames and pornography it’s really difficult for me to feel good and proud of myself. 

So I’m an 18 year old trying to walk the narrow road as Tyler from Real Social Dynamics defines this “narrow road”. I want to live a life of continuous presence and execution of my goals and not a life of avoiding reality, either by unconsciousness or overstimulation.

PMO is overstimulation at its finest. It totally drains my intent and motivation and I want to quit it for good.


MY REWIRING PROCESS

I have had many nofap streaks, in which I haven’t surpassed the 14 days. I believe I ended up relapsing because I focused on the days left to achieve my next streak goal rather than taking action in a continuous basis.

I haven't shared my thoughts on this subject with anyone until now. I hope writing on this journal is gonna help me to keep strong!

Now I’m in a 4 day streak and I want a full 90 day rewiring. So please, wish me luck!

« Last Edit: March 13, 2015, 12:51:27 PM by vaitoloc96 »

Doc Green

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Re: 18 year old walking the narrow road
« Reply #1 on: March 11, 2015, 11:42:45 PM »
Good luck fam

Pas spécial

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Re: 18 year old walking the narrow road
« Reply #2 on: March 23, 2015, 08:08:19 PM »
Thanks mate:)

Day 17

So 13 days later I'm posting again. Actually on day 12 or so I wrote a loong entry using my phone, talking about interesting stuff but guess what, I lost it all somehow. It really pissed me off LoL. I won't ever again write a post on my phone.

Last weekend I worked lots of hours in the restaurant, I got home so tired I didn't have time to get any urges. Despite troughout the week I had more spare time I kept active and worked out everyday.

Sometimes I can feel down but generally I'm more motivated and more social. When I used to fap I would really detach myself from the world during and after PMO.

Now I really want to get to the 20 day milestone, though I know that focusing too much on the days left to my next goal will fuck up my reboot. As it did on my last streak. I have to keep focused on taking action.

Thanks for reading guys. Keep on hitting it hard!

DanteKO

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Re: 18 year old walking the narrow road
« Reply #3 on: March 23, 2015, 08:36:44 PM »
Good luck dude. The first 2 weeks really test you, I know that for myself. Keep busy.