Author Topic: My Journal  (Read 11800 times)

MioMio

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Re: My Journal
« Reply #25 on: February 26, 2015, 05:59:39 PM »
I think you have to find the source of your tension. It it is sexual tension, try to sublime it. All that energy will help you to achieve anything you want. Try to learn playing guitar or engage in some marshal art activities. Do something that is really interresting for you.

NewAdam, thanks a lot for your support! I'm sad to see that you are struggling with your reboot, but I see a big chance for you to keep on going, by using this forum for motivation and advice.
You are right, sexual tension is a big problem and I try to overcome it not by surpressing it, but staying away from sexual triggers. I must confess that I had my weak moments in the last weeks, but I saw the problem, stopped and went back to my old path.

GL for your first week of MO free man.

You, Vargulf, are right on. I think going back to hard-mode and cutting weekly MO from my plan is the way to go. Seriously, it was the reason why I got weak in the first place.
@NewAdam, when you feel ready, join us on this path!




MioMio

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Re: My Journal
« Reply #26 on: March 04, 2015, 12:42:40 PM »
Day 72

Approximately two days ago, my libido went through the roof again. It is a bit tempting to m, but I try to soak the feeling up and stay cool. Random boners, this tingly feeling around your waist.... Things I remember from high school are slowly re-appearing :D

MioMio

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Re: My Journal
« Reply #27 on: March 05, 2015, 06:11:37 PM »
Day 74 = D-Day!

I have made it past my last try to reboot. Going strong!

NewAdam

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Re: My Journal
« Reply #28 on: March 07, 2015, 03:48:00 AM »
So You have beated Your previous best time? ;)

MioMio

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Re: My Journal
« Reply #29 on: March 07, 2015, 05:26:15 AM »
Yes! Although I must comment on that. Last time I had been going hard mode for approx. three weeks and around day 70 met this crazy russian chick, then at day 72 had a wet dream. I just couldn't stand the urge to pmo anymore, I had to find a release.


NewAdam

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Re: My Journal
« Reply #30 on: March 08, 2015, 12:48:45 AM »
I can tottaly understand you! Yesterday I had an erotic dream as well, so during the day my libido was sky rocketing, but I am still on the way! :)

Anyway, congrats! Your success us is inspiring! What is your next big goal? Half an year?:)

MioMio

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Re: My Journal
« Reply #31 on: March 08, 2015, 05:26:55 AM »
I will stay with my usual plan and always add two weeks. It is working out very well for me because as a goal it is just enough to feel confident about continuing, but at the same time I also have pressure to make it happen.

So, if I come close to relapse, I tell myself that it's just x days more and then I will have reached my next goal.

MioMio

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Re: My Journal
« Reply #32 on: March 09, 2015, 05:51:29 PM »
Day 78

I have been using an online dating system for exactly one week now and went on three dates so far. I must admit that I wasn't sure about the whole thing because browsing profiles reminded me a lot of browsing porn.
Luckily, I noticed that my genuine interest for people has been a big plus in these meetings and I have to state that I completely underestimated old fashioned rituals such as holding the door hopen.
I met an amazing girl tonight :) What a great feeling! But what surprised me even more was that I was able to be the charming guy, who would normally appear after some drinks.
I relate the majority of this progress to the reboot, because apart from an attactive exterior I was actually really interested in meeting the characte behind this pretty face. It's the same old song all of us have been singing, stop objectifying and start being real!

Big night, I'm pumped to continue this path!

NewAdam

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Re: My Journal
« Reply #33 on: March 11, 2015, 01:49:32 PM »
For me, those dating sites was really useful to find a partner, but usualy we both were interested only in sex, so I have pretty bad memories and bad experience about such way of looking for a women, but for You it looks like you have more mature point of view to the women You met.
Good luck with your new girlfriend. ;)

MioMio

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Re: My Journal
« Reply #34 on: March 11, 2015, 02:02:20 PM »
Thanks for sharing your experience! Good luck on keeping up with your reboot :D

NewAdam

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Re: My Journal
« Reply #35 on: March 22, 2015, 07:32:13 AM »
90 Days man!!! Congrats!!!

You were strong for 90 days!!! Power 90! I bet now you have a feeling of a winner! If you dont, you should.:) If stayed strong for 90 days, you can do anything.:)

MioMio

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Re: My Journal
« Reply #36 on: March 23, 2015, 05:06:29 PM »
92 days and I am exciting to reach 100! I am really, really confident that I am on a good way to stop pmo for good.

I am also very happy that my last successfull date has developed into a very promising path to a relationship.

Naturally, this is all very new to me. First girlfriend, new experiences, first sex. Basically, this is what I decided to implement in this journal during the next weeks. I know that some rebooters have been dealing with the issue of being inexperienced in relationships and a virgin in their mid-twenties. Hopefully, this plan will be crowned by as many good experiences as my reboot has brought me.

I have met this girl on online dating and we've been seeing each other for 2,5 weeks now. Yesterday I've slept over at her place and we were about to have sex. Truthfully, there was nothing in my way, except for anxiety of finally losing my virginity. I was literally shivering and stopped any further action. It was a really abrubt end and of course stirred some major insecurity in my partner. At this point I knew that sex is still a major issue for me and later on I decided that I trust her enough to be honest about my past experiences.

I opened up today and had a long discussion of my sexual past and we've tried to find reasons why it hasn't happened so far. At this point I don't really want to go into the details, but I must say that I am amazed by the astonishment in the girl. Even after repeating "virgin" for the fourth time, she was not willing to believe my words. Honestly, this reaction is probably part of my anxiety.
In any case, she accepted and was very tolerant about my situation. However, I am also a bit stirred by her argument that a good looking guy my age should have had sex with more than 10+ girls already, because it is considered normal. Well, here goes normal :D I understand that I have never taken the time to look at this issue from the other side, but with such an argument I tried to explain her what a huge amount of pressure it puts on a virgin my age.

In the process of my reboot I feel that losing my virginity will be a big step in overcoming porn for good. In the last months so many parts of my life have drastically changed to the better that I am honestly over-excited to finally overcome this last barrier that has been on my mind for such a long time.

At last, I had to realize that porn is not gone when one doesn't watch it. There is definitely still room for discussion on the topic of porn. Let's say it this way, she was willing to accept my decision to stop watching porn, but it didn't sound like she actually understand the full dimension of this decision.
I will keep this journal updated. Just like in the past, I am eager to read my post in a couple of weeks!

MioMio

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Re: My Journal
« Reply #37 on: March 23, 2015, 05:09:34 PM »
90 Days man!!! Congrats!!!

You were strong for 90 days!!! Power 90! I bet now you have a feeling of a winner! If you dont, you should.:) If stayed strong for 90 days, you can do anything.:)

Thanks a lot. I am happy that you are on a good way too!

mtaha2015

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Re: My Journal
« Reply #38 on: March 23, 2015, 05:41:44 PM »
miomio you made 92 days last time.
and now you are close to 30.
keep it up.
keep this good work going.

you deserve the change.

MioMio

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Re: My Journal
« Reply #39 on: March 25, 2015, 01:55:49 PM »
Quick update: I couldn't take the pressure anymore, I was literally feeling sick of horniness. Even when riding my motorcycle, I couldn't hold back boners. This had to stop, so I MO'd.

No worries, still on track with PMO :D

mtaha2015

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Re: My Journal
« Reply #40 on: March 25, 2015, 02:45:27 PM »
good.
NO porn.

NewAdam

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Re: My Journal
« Reply #41 on: March 26, 2015, 02:45:47 PM »
Yes sometimes it maybe necessary to release the energy? Do you have any side effect MO'ing?

mtaha2015

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Re: My Journal
« Reply #42 on: March 26, 2015, 08:00:44 PM »
It always does have side effects

MioMio

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Re: My Journal
« Reply #43 on: March 27, 2015, 12:30:33 PM »
Yes sometimes it maybe necessary to release the energy? Do you have any side effect MO'ing?

Definitely a good way to release energy! I came to a point where I was glad to have real boners again, but when you walk around with a bulge in your pants all day, it does get a bit strange!!!

In any case, I felt that MO'ing was a good energy release, but at the same time I had to control myself not to binge on MO again. This is probably the only side-effect. Otherwise, not much has changed.

On a side note, I got a great blow job yesterday. At first I was a bit anxious, because I wasn't sure if my ED would hinder me from getting an erection. In any case, once I got used to the sensation and started to relax, I had no problem keeping it up :D


mtaha2015

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Re: My Journal
« Reply #44 on: March 27, 2015, 04:28:38 PM »
sex is better than masturbation

NewAdam

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Re: My Journal
« Reply #45 on: March 28, 2015, 10:44:44 AM »
Yes sometimes it maybe necessary to release the energy? Do you have any side effect MO'ing?



On a side note, I got a great blow job yesterday. At first I was a bit anxious, because I wasn't sure if my ED would hinder me from getting an erection. In any case, once I got used to the sensation and started to relax, I had no problem keeping it up :D

It is even better way release energy.:)


mtaha2015

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Re: My Journal
« Reply #46 on: March 28, 2015, 12:28:43 PM »
Any update ?

NewAdam

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Re: My Journal
« Reply #47 on: April 04, 2015, 04:52:56 AM »
Hey bro,

how are You? Long since we've heard something from You.

Vargulf

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Re: My Journal
« Reply #48 on: April 07, 2015, 12:13:09 PM »
Sorry to be so slow to check in man. I got snowed under with uni work and my gf didn't like the sound of no MO, we are long distance so that's her only method of getting me off. I told her to watch the TED talk on PMO and so I'm starting to raise her awareness of the topic (though I can tell she doesn't really understand).

You did well with no MO, I only lasted 2 weeks (sexy photos were sent and it became too hard - no pun intended). I think the important thing to take away is how good you feel and how that testosterone build up really increases your ability as a man. After 2-3 weeks I could think clearly and felt powerful, in control and capable. It's definitely good for you, but does get impractical to do for too long.

I'm going to do another 2 week stint and see how I feel. GL with the budding relationship mate.

 



MioMio

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Re: My Journal
« Reply #49 on: April 09, 2015, 02:36:10 AM »
Sorry, for the time off. Like Vargulf, I was busy with school  8)

I had to put an end to seeing the above mentioned girl. After my first crush settled, I didn't feel much motivation to keep the contact going. Meanwhile, she was already building up emotions and I felt that it wouldn't be fair to keep going this way. In the end, I only met up with her when I didn't want to feel lonely or when I was super horny and knew she could fix it.

Which brings me to the topic of my last few posts. I'm still a virgin. It doesn't bother me as much as before, but I'm struggling with the fact that I get a full erection, but have problems maintaining it when it comes to sex. It's literally the moment before entering her vagina when the erection fails. I also noticed that I would be really horny and ready to enter her, but as soon as the genitals are about to touch, I lose all stamina.

I know that this is plainly psychological and will keep on going to get this issue solved :)