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Covid quarantine and recovery

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aquarius25:
I saw a post in the main forum regarding this topic and thought I would start one here. How is quarantine effecting your recovery? Is it helping? Is it hurting? How so?

For myself in some ways it’s helpful because on one hand we have more time together. On the other our time together always has kids around. The stress if being a small biz owner add a lot to the tension and stress in the house. Then there is the fact that there is no real escape from each other. I mean we do get away from each other every once in a while but. We are together a lot. I sometimes feel like I am suffocating with this hurt and thoughts of his porn addiction. I feel like it’s important to be able to get out and enjoy each other too and with everything closed there isn’t much opportunity for a “date night”. We have tried to go on neighborhood walks together so that helps a bit bit we both feel a bit uncomfortable talking when all of our neighbors are around.
So that’s my experience. What’s yours?

NoWifeNoStrife:
Well, divorces have gone through the roof during quarantine...so I would guess it hasn't been great for most couples. Kind of a bitch to find out you hardly know the person you married because you never had to spend any time with them before.

kopp:
I relapsed more often due to boredom during quarantine. My internet addiction got wilder. Otherwise it had so many positive effects on me. I have the luxury to be quarantined with my girlfriend and her parents in their house, near nature.

It cured my girlfriend's depression. She's so lovely now. Quarantine has been a huge boost for our couple. So no it's not something awful for ALL couples. :P

I worked out like crazy. There's just nothing else to do for me here. We went running often, we work out almost everyday, we bike sometimes., we're outside everyday.. I took 3kg (6.6lbs) of mostly muscle mass.

Sanders:
Hi Aquarius,

Quarantine times are though indeed. I can tell a bit about my situation here, the whole corona situation has made quite an impact on it. I hope to get your input too because I'm trying to find a way to make this better for my wife.

For about three weeks now my wife knows about my addiction, 6,5 years we've been together. We have a one bedroom house so much privacy isn't really possible. I've moved to her country so I can't really stay at family for some time or fly back home. Friends I don't really have much, but my wife feels like she can't trust me when I'm somewhere else. Being in the same house has a good side but also bad sides. The 'good' part is that I can see how much hurt my actions have caused and how my wife is physically and mentally in pain. Even though it's horrible, it's important for me to see how my actions have impacted her. If I'd moved out for some time I wouldn't know the real length or her struggles. This helps me want to quit porn more. Another good thing is that I can be of 'phsical help' in the house. Cleaning, food, taking care of the dog and all. She doesn't need to worry about these things, she can follow her own process. Another good thing is that I can't really see any porn related things. We've blocked everything on my devices and she can see everything I do on phones and laptops. Physically I'm not able to get to porn which is good!

The bad things is that I feel like every time she sees me she feels hurt. I try to be as much outside as possible by taking walks, cycling, taking the dog out and whatnot. Given how fresh this situation is we're not really doing any nice things together. First just getting through the pain before looking forward. The lack of sleep is hurting us both. Since I'm also turning away from porn at the samae time, I get pretty easily irritated. This ofcourse doesn't help our situation. Giving space is also difficult to actually do when you're in the same house. I want to give her the physical space, but still I want to try to do everything to make her heal and feel a little bit better.

Not really sure whether it's good or bad, but I'll have to take it as it is.  Good luck to you both!

kopp:
@Sanders I think it'd be positive for both of you to have some little space sometimes. Make friends, don't stay alone. Your story is touching, stay strong brother. You're awesome.

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