Author Topic: Covid - an inflection point?  (Read 5518 times)

ShadeTrenicin

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Re: Covid - an inflection point?
« Reply #150 on: July 23, 2020, 02:32:52 AM »
Thanks for sharing this insight UKGuy. It provides us with an small preview on the road ahead for us guys who are not there yet. And of course well done on winning. I do also recognize the trigger you describe. It's like a switch that flicks on the moment you hear the door closing. Like an automated response.
I think this example shows us just how conditioned we all are in our behaviour. And all of that for porn..

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workinprogressUK

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Re: Covid - an inflection point?
« Reply #151 on: July 23, 2020, 04:13:58 AM »
A good example is this - I'm having a really good day today. My daughters are out with friends, and my wife and I have been working well together and productively on our business. I feel good.
My wife then goes out to collect one of the girls from the city and immediately there is a massive trigger hits me from nowhere. Alone. 45 minutes at least. All the tech I want. No filters. It's such an ingrained thought pattern after living it for so long. EVERY time I have been left alone over the past years (decades rather), I have PMO'd. Well...probably 98% to be more accurate. I may have been asleep for the other 2%.
Those habits are very strong - the brain connections well worn. Breaking them down such that the alone trigger completely disappears will take some time.

Great post, Guy. It brought to mind my first day of residential rehab, seven years ago, hosted by a therapist called Paula Hall, about whom I can't speak highly enough. She told a great story on the first morning about "The road to Brighton", which I'll paraphrase..... think of your neural pathways as actual footpaths to the beach. The beach is a happy place. There are lots of paths to lots of beaches, but Brighton beach is to your liking, so you take that path and continue to walk that same path to Brighton every time you want the beach. And the more times you walk that one path to that one beach, at the expense of any other path and any other beach, the wider, smoother and faster that path becomes, making it ever more easy to keep going to the same beach. Then one day, you feel the need for a day at the seaside but don't want to go to Brighton any more, so you try to take the path that leads to Camber Sands. But because you've not used that path for so long, it's all rutted, overgrown with wet brambles and nettles, and a right pig to walk down, and some voice in your head says "bollox to this", and reminds you about the nice, fast, highway to Brighton, and even if it's just for a second, you can be tempted to turn round and head back to your old haunt, even though you were determined not to go there again.

But you, Guy, because you're determined to change and succeed and you've learned strategies and processes to help you on your journey, and you're willing to sacrifice some nettle stings and bramble scratches and the odd twisted ankle if it means not going to Brighton.... you've fought your way down the path to Camber Sands and back enough times for that path to have become easier and wider than it used to be. It's still not automatic. Your chimp says "beach" and a big, fat, neural pathway you've walked down for 7,000 days still lights up fast and shouts "BRIGHTON"! But because you've not taken it for over 100 days, that path's starting to get a bit scruffy, with a few dog roses and nettles growing through, so it's getting less painful to choose the paths to other beaches via other paths. Your brain's changing. The neural pathway to P is getting weaker, as others are getting stronger, but it might remain the most convenient and automatic path to the beach for a while yet.

It's taken me ages to type this! If anybody can be arsed to read it, I hope they don't get to the end and think "what a load of utter bullshit".

You're one of a bunch of really impressive blokes in here at the moment, Guy, and your success is a source of inspiration. Wishing you every success today and for the long term. Continue to ignore the odd nettle sting and enjoy the sunshine at Camber Sands.
« Last Edit: July 23, 2020, 04:20:23 AM by workinprogressUK »

UKGuy

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Re: Covid - an inflection point?
« Reply #152 on: July 23, 2020, 05:36:37 AM »
That is a quality and powerful metaphor WIP which will further help me avoid going to 'Brighton' - thankyou for taking the time to share it. Thanks also for your kind words which mean a lot coming from such a seasoned and smart campaigner. Sending wishes of peace and strength down the M56.

A good example is this - I'm having a really good day today. My daughters are out with friends, and my wife and I have been working well together and productively on our business. I feel good.
My wife then goes out to collect one of the girls from the city and immediately there is a massive trigger hits me from nowhere. Alone. 45 minutes at least. All the tech I want. No filters. It's such an ingrained thought pattern after living it for so long. EVERY time I have been left alone over the past years (decades rather), I have PMO'd. Well...probably 98% to be more accurate. I may have been asleep for the other 2%.
Those habits are very strong - the brain connections well worn. Breaking them down such that the alone trigger completely disappears will take some time.

Great post, Guy. It brought to mind my first day of residential rehab, seven years ago, hosted by a therapist called Paula Hall, about whom I can't speak highly enough. She told a great story on the first morning about "The road to Brighton", which I'll paraphrase..... think of your neural pathways as actual footpaths to the beach. The beach is a happy place. There are lots of paths to lots of beaches, but Brighton beach is to your liking, so you take that path and continue to walk that same path to Brighton every time you want the beach. And the more times you walk that one path to that one beach, at the expense of any other path and any other beach, the wider, smoother and faster that path becomes, making it ever more easy to keep going to the same beach. Then one day, you feel the need for a day at the seaside but don't want to go to Brighton any more, so you try to take the path that leads to Camber Sands. But because you've not used that path for so long, it's all rutted, overgrown with wet brambles and nettles, and a right pig to walk down, and some voice in your head says "bollox to this", and reminds you about the nice, fast, highway to Brighton, and even if it's just for a second, you can be tempted to turn round and head back to your old haunt, even though you were determined not to go there again.

But you, Guy, because you're determined to change and succeed and you've learned strategies and processes to help you on your journey, and you're willing to sacrifice some nettle stings and bramble scratches and the odd twisted ankle if it means not going to Brighton.... you've fought your way down the path to Camber Sands and back enough times for that path to have become easier and wider than it used to be. It's still not automatic. Your chimp says "beach" and a big, fat, neural pathway you've walked down for 7,000 days still lights up fast and shouts "BRIGHTON"! But because you've not taken it for over 100 days, that path's starting to get a bit scruffy, with a few dog roses and nettles growing through, so it's getting less painful to choose the paths to other beaches via other paths. Your brain's changing. The neural pathway to P is getting weaker, as others are getting stronger, but it might remain the most convenient and automatic path to the beach for a while yet.

It's taken me ages to type this! If anybody can be arsed to read it, I hope they don't get to the end and think "what a load of utter bullshit".

You're one of a bunch of really impressive blokes in here at the moment, Guy, and your success is a source of inspiration. Wishing you every success today and for the long term. Continue to ignore the odd nettle sting and enjoy the sunshine at Camber Sands.

TheNorman

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Re: Covid - an inflection point?
« Reply #153 on: July 23, 2020, 08:53:25 AM »
I can't help but read your guys stuff in a British accent. I'm sure I'm butchering it in my mind but the message still comes across loud and clear. Great analogy WIP. I hope we can all walk through a few thorns if it means not going to a beach with E-Coli!

UKGuy

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Re: Covid - an inflection point?
« Reply #154 on: July 27, 2020, 04:15:22 PM »
Hi all,
Tough few days, but then I read something which PE30 had written today which was so powerful for me - nothing necessarily new in terms of content, but just written with such honest authenticity as if he could see right into my mind! I won't bore you with the details of my (part) hangover induced rocky weekend, but grateful (once again) for this forum which keeps me topped up with motivation and connectivity. Wishing you all well for this week.  :)

ShadeTrenicin

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Re: Covid - an inflection point?
« Reply #155 on: July 27, 2020, 04:23:38 PM »
Glad to read that you've endured once again. I've read the specific bit from PE30 and the clear choice he presents is a very powerful one. Right now, looking at such a choice from a distance it seems so obvious on why the one choice is so bad for you but when you are the one facing it it is so damn difficult to withstand.

Wishing you a good night
« Last Edit: July 27, 2020, 04:25:10 PM by ShadeTrenicin »
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UKGuy

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Re: Covid - an inflection point?
« Reply #156 on: July 28, 2020, 02:52:53 AM »
Thanks Shade,
Still not myself today, but will survive. A lot of it down to relationship/power struggles with my 16yo. She was due to go to Spain for a week with her friend's family which has now been cancelled due to new covid quarantine regulations. The other 3 of us (my wife, me, and our 13 yo) were going to a caravan in the UK during the same week which was something we all wanted to do, but my elder daughter had previously refused to do. Now she's forced to come along and it's a bit of a 'lose-lose' for all involved!!
Life's a bit like this for me - maybe some of the others can relate?.....

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dLuEY6jN6gY

Hope you're doing well my friend?
« Last Edit: July 28, 2020, 02:54:58 AM by UKGuy »

workinprogressUK

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Re: Covid - an inflection point?
« Reply #157 on: July 28, 2020, 04:42:45 AM »
I feel for you!  Loved  the video (hope TheNorman likes the quaint accents).
I get similar with my best mate's lad, who is 18 now, and for the last few years has allowed his parents to fund him going on our group Ibiza and ski holidays, (which teenager wouldn't grab a free week in Ibiza?) but openly resents every second he has to spend with them. I'm sure your daughter's not like that, but you can understand her being a bit salty, when she thinks she's graduated to an independent trip to sunny Spain with her mate, and has to settle for a week in rainy UK with her...…. parents :-( Hope you can all find ways to let her spread her wings on the family trip.

TheNorman

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Re: Covid - an inflection point?
« Reply #158 on: July 28, 2020, 08:33:49 AM »
I did like the quaint accents but the idea of my kids becoming teenagers is terrifying! Good luck to you UKGuy! Like WIP said, maybe there's ways she can have some autonomy on the trip...for all your sakes!

BigChanges66

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Re: Covid - an inflection point?
« Reply #159 on: July 28, 2020, 10:32:23 AM »
Love WIP's Road to Brighton story.  Often the simplest analogies can be the most effective.  I have hiked a lot on the past and it is easy to think of places I have been with a fork in the trail and making a choice about which trail to take.  It is also a good reminder that changes don't happen overnight.  It takes a while for paths to change.

Thanks,
BC66

UKGuy

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Re: Covid - an inflection point?
« Reply #160 on: July 28, 2020, 01:31:42 PM »
I looked over the precipice today. It's been coming as you may have detected from recent posts.
I've shared multiple stress triggers over the last few days and central amongst these is my 16yo's behaviour, and whilst she be fine (it's just a teenage combination of lack of gratitude, entitlement, selfishness etc), she is really testing the limits at the moment for both my wife and I, and my reactions could have been a bit better than they were. So...at home, things are feeling a little fraught.
Simultaneously, yesterday, I received a Linked in message from a girl I used to work with. There was nothing at all happening when we worked together (that is a red line for me anyway), and our professional relationship was pretty much limited to her sending me expense claims to approve. She was attractive though, and probably late 20's or something - a nice girl. That was it. In the exchange of messages we had, she was definitely flirting, and I was treading a thin line between enjoying it and not being inappropriate (or indeed crossing my own red line). However, it definitely activated something in my brain - the worn chat pathways to Brighton to use WIPUK's metaphor.
Fast forward to today, situation with daughter still poor, other stresses, unhealthy mindset. No morning exercise (a rarity for me). I did come on here and was active, but it perhaps didn't cut through.
I found myself going for a meditate mid afternoon, which once I got in my bedroom immediately become a 'lie down' , 20 minute nap, to re-awake and promptly break all my own rules. iPhone 'skirting', leading to a free chat page, and an exchange with a woman which was fortunately cut short by her going 'off line'. Thankfully I hadn't MO'd - in fact, I'd not even touched myself, but if I'd been in a brain scanner, bits of my brain would have been seen lighting up that hadn't in nearly 4 months.
Thankfully, my wife then FaceTimed me to ask if I wanted to go for a walk. Fortunately, I had the presence of mind to say yes, closed the browser, went downstairs and for a walk, which was good. We talked about our daughter, and I shared with her my situation - that I felt exceptionally close to relapsing at present, admitted that I had 'skirted' (but with no reference to chat, which is something I have never shared - largely through shame and desire to not hurt her - for some reason, wanking over photos seems less of an infidelity than chatting to someone and I assume she would see it the same way). Talking helped, and we agreed at my suggestion that we would put some iPhone restrictions back in place to help me guard against what feels like a risky time. My second action was to get a beer, come here and unload my situation on you guys, so thanks if anyone has made it this far!
Shade recognised in his own thread today that having read what I and PE30 had wrote, the addiction still got the better of him. I can relate to that now much more than when I read his words this morning, before things then went a bit awry for me. Also WIPUK wrote somewhere about every day being like day 1. I don't feel as if I have broken my streak, which is something rightly or wrongly that gives me a sense of achievement and keeps me 'glued' in a positive mindset rather than going off the rails, but at the same time, I feel I have crossed multiple boundaries that may set me back without a period of real humility and focus. So, with that in mind, I'm assuming the mindset of a 'day 1er' - something which I've definitely lost of late, and need to regain with some urgency. Thanks all.
« Last Edit: July 28, 2020, 01:44:20 PM by UKGuy »

ShadeTrenicin

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Re: Covid - an inflection point?
« Reply #161 on: July 28, 2020, 02:12:14 PM »
Hey UKGuy,

Boy was I relieved to read that your wife facetimed you. Seems like you were save by the bell. If your wife wouldn't have facetimed you would you have relapsed? Seems like a tough question but it needs to be asked imo.
So, from what I am reading is that you've had multiple instances in which you did not choose the 'right' path. (almost) giving in to the flirting, not going for your morning workout, not meditating but sleeping. So what happend exactly when you woke up? It seems like you had that f*ck all attitude that some of us also experience. Is this that unhealthy mindset that you mentioned? I think that this instance shows the importance of vigilance but also what you described in your 90 days succes post; building that wall of defences. Somehow the problem (for me at least) is recognizing when you are in or at the start of such a spiral. You did describe that you saw it coming over the last few days, but do you remember when you actively recognized it?


Anyway, I was glad to read you took your wifes offer to join her for a walk and that you immediately took action into discussing this,the issues with your daughter and setting phone restrictions. What was your wifes reaction to all this?


Have a good evening UKGuy, and let's keep counting at day onehundred something and let's see this as a firm reminder of how watchful we constantly need to be. But the streak is not lost.

Take care my friend, I am as always rooting for you

So, the
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mr.slurps

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Re: Covid - an inflection point?
« Reply #162 on: July 28, 2020, 05:08:42 PM »
Hiya UK, Shade and..., I'm just intruding on your thread b/c I'm a nuisance and I miss you guys. I'll check up on your streaks in a second. Hopefully they're still intact. First, I've set myself the daunting challenge of reading you guys' last 2 prodigious entries. I'm sure they're wise and inspiring, but how about spreading a little milk of human kindness!? haha
Anyhow, I'm going to try to keep my eye on the ball (baseball, not football), at least while I'm on here. I don't want to use it as source of social amusement.
I'd be a distraction and it makes me feel like a fake. I feel that a lot lately- kinda like showing up at the Arsenal (my son's team) practice session and sipping a beer and chatting with fans instead of improving myself/team.

workinprogressUK

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Re: Covid - an inflection point?
« Reply #163 on: July 29, 2020, 09:37:16 AM »
Hope your feet are on solid ground now, UKGuy. Worried for you, because those kind of excursions into grey areas are the kinds of things I've allowed myself to do just prior to slipping or relapsing. I think of it as the "emotional relapse", when I've let my standards slip and broken my own rules. You can get yourself back on the straight and narrow easily, though, and I'm confident that you will.

Sounds like it was great timing that your wife messaged you, and you deserve credit for saying "yes" to her offer of a walk, and then sharing some of the details. Great work on putting some 1st level barriers back on your phone. It's what's inside your head that matters most, though, so I hope that you don't let things get you bent out of shape. Wishing you every strength, best of luck, and a chilled-out daughter for a few days at least.

TheNorman

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Re: Covid - an inflection point?
« Reply #164 on: July 29, 2020, 09:53:36 AM »
I'm so glad you didn't slip off that cliff UK. It's a long way down and it will hurt like hell, but if you did fall, know that we'll all be close by with ropes to pull you back up and bandages for your cuts. You're very good at offering all of us a kind word and great insights, and you do seem able to turn those inwards, but you're also human. Emotions without logic to filter them is what gets us all too close to that ledge. I hope you can use this recent event as a good reminder that you have the tools here and within yourself to stay on solid footing.

We're here for you!

UKGuy

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Re: Covid - an inflection point?
« Reply #165 on: July 29, 2020, 01:38:31 PM »
Thanks so much for the kind words, compassion and encouragement gents - it means a lot.
I am pleased to report that today has been a much better day:
1) My wife and I have had a breakthrough with the situation with my daughter. I won't bore you with the details but we re-read the salient chapter (6) of a great book that we purchased a few years ago, and boy...did it give us the clarity and direction that we needed. For any parents of teenagers it's called "Get out of my life (But first take me and Alex into town)" by Suzanne Franks and Tony Wolf. It's as accurate a depiction of teenage life as that video I posted yesterday BUT with the added benefit of guidance for parents to navigate. The air is cleared and harmony has been restored.
2) Shade - you asked me would I have relapsed if my wife hadn't facetimed me. I think the answer is not necessarily then, but the actions I had taken had clearly put me back in 'secretive' territory, and I suspect that that would have continued today with me stealing time here and there on chat and as a consequence not being present - the breakthrough with my daughter would therefore not have happened as I would not have been invested in it. To me, that's the clearest manifestation of the choice between the two life choice we continually face and it makes me somewhat emotional to reflect on that knowing I took the right path, as many times in the past I haven't.
3) I have felt quite delicate all day - all most as if I've had a traumatic experience - yesterday has definitely disrupted my emotional balance a little, and there has been a pull towards 'acting out' almost a recognition that it's an option for me, whereas it felt previously like the weeds had grown on that particular pathway. I have a mixture of feelings - guilt, gratitude, pride, relief...little bit of fear too.
4) The action on the phone feels like a recommitment in itself, and that feels positive - a statement of intent - acting like 'day 1'
All that said, I think (I hope) that this experience has actually made me stronger - I was so near to f@*king it up - if I can somehow use the emotion of the aftermath, and clarity of the binary choice which very nearly had a different outcome, then perhaps that can propel me onwards.
Thanks again for your support. I hope you're all well and I will catch up on your own journals/developments tomorrow - going to spend some time with my family now.

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Re: Covid - an inflection point?
« Reply #166 on: July 29, 2020, 03:06:43 PM »
That is some great self-reflection UK Guy.  It sounds like the last couple of days can up being a good touchstone to use in the future.  Keep up the great work.

Thanks,
BC66

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Re: Covid - an inflection point?
« Reply #167 on: July 30, 2020, 01:55:11 AM »
Hiya Pal,  You certainly dodged a bullet- actually 3 or 4., Give yourself a pat on the back or a nice steak dinner.  About that timely call from the Mrs.-- that's b/c of all the good karma you accrued here.
But listen Pal, why are thinking re "infidelity"? (I know you were comparing pics v. chat)  I'm sensing you need to do a better job at forgiving yourself for your real or imagined infidelity. This isn't even about your wife. Can you work a bit of self-forgiveness into your meditation practice?
I don't know if your wounds still feel open or if the flirty exchange opened them up a bit. But I've rarely seen anyone work harder on their family's needs. So, don't you dare beat yourself up. (You called me to task on that so turn around is fair play.)

workinprogressUK

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Re: Covid - an inflection point?
« Reply #168 on: July 30, 2020, 08:41:02 AM »
The action on the phone feels like a recommitment in itself, and that feels positive - a statement of intent - acting like 'day 1'
All that said, I think (I hope) that this experience has actually made me stronger - I was so near to f@*king it up - if I can somehow use the emotion of the aftermath, and clarity of the binary choice which very nearly had a different outcome, then perhaps that can propel me onwards.

I'm sure it will, mate. Sometimes it's good to give ourselves a reminder of what life looks like if we choose the other path. Hopefully that's what you've done. Certainly looks that way and hopefully reinforces your processes for future success. Enjoy the sunshine!

Joel

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Re: Covid - an inflection point?
« Reply #169 on: July 30, 2020, 02:09:28 PM »
Glad to hear you're pushing through, Guy. A fresh 'statement of intent' - always a good idea. Just listened to an inspiring Dobber podcast (well, they're all great, but...) - 103 – How To Take Massive Action - seems relevant here. The guy on the call is so amped up, may be something you need to feel - 'I'm back! I'm UKGuy, and I'm crushing this!'

Stay strong!

UKGuy

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Re: Covid - an inflection point?
« Reply #170 on: July 31, 2020, 03:38:52 AM »
Thanks Mr S, WIP & Joel,
I'm just going to do some weights Joel, so will listen to that Dobber episode instead of my usual hip-hop!
Feeling good today despite a re-imposed 'semi lockdown' in Greater Manchester. Glad we sorted things out with our eldest before that news broke last night! Enjoy the UK sunshine WIP and Joel.

Georgos

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Re: Covid - an inflection point?
« Reply #171 on: August 01, 2020, 05:15:23 AM »
I don't know if you got my message, my sent mail box says empty for some reason, so I hope you don't mind me writing here.

in truth I don't even know whether you are male or female, though if i knew you i would never say that.

i suspect there are some females on the board using it to check up on their husbands and the like, that is fine, I'm certainly not here to find a date.

However, I have an uncomfortable feeling that I know you from another time and place in the distant histories of my life, and as much as I value your privacy, it would be somewhat good manners of me to clarify this for the sake of dispelling any delusions i may or may not have.

If you think we have been friends in the past, please send me a PM so I don't go crazy.

Lots of love and good luck with the struggles of life,

We are winning

Saluude

UKGuy

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Re: Covid - an inflection point?
« Reply #172 on: August 01, 2020, 06:14:19 AM »
Hello Georgos,

No - we have never met or been in contact before.

I am male, 47 years old and I like in the UK. I have have never had a profile on here other than this 'UKGuy' one. I am on no other sites or forums.

Wishing you well with your journey and take care.

UKGuy

Georgos

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Re: Covid - an inflection point?
« Reply #173 on: August 01, 2020, 06:33:28 AM »
Thanks UK guy, I like the Baye Fall style clothing banner, never could carry it off, but at least I've made it past 16, love and truth always G

UKGuy

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Re: Covid - an inflection point?
« Reply #174 on: August 03, 2020, 03:11:50 AM »
A strange weekend.

Great day Saturday. Did some really enjoyable work on my business launch. Good evening but with a little too much to drink. That said, my wife - who I've been getting along with famously for many weeks now, started to show signs of irritability with me during the day. This continued into Sunday into mutual irritability as I responded to her behaviour towards me. A little 'chimpesque' on my part perhaps in responding to what was largely a bit of PMT for her. I neglected to go on a family walk, largely as I had run 10K already in the morning whilst everyone else was in bed, and tbh, didn't relish spending any more time with my wife - stayed good whilst the family were out. Did some accounts, spoke to my sister, had a couple of games of Fortnite (sad, I know!). When my wife returned her mood hadn't changed. Found myself 'circling' (as Joel would say). I have Instagram and Pintrest still on my phone for legitimate business reasons. Never looked at anything on them before, but started to explore. Nothing particularly explicit, but my neural pathways were certainly fired up. Did it for an hour or so. Just browsing - no 'self touching'. And then I chose to stop. Went downstairs, had another minor disagreement with my wife, and retired to the bedroom and started reading a book.

I'm a little concerned that this is twice in less than a week where after a period of 16 or 17 weeks with absolutely no artificial stimulation whatsoever, including fantasy, I have had two incidents where I have strayed from my commitment to myself. On the other hand I am pleased that on both occasions I have neither M'd or O'd and have ultimately stopped. The question is where I go from here.

The triggers on both occasions related to emotional stress around rejection/relationships. My daughter earlier in the week, followed by my wife yesterday. At the same time, I can feel a fatigue setting in in terms of my resolve to the cause. Life is starting to feel a little 'plain'. The sense of achievement in securing a no PMO world for myself is subsiding and it feels as if I'm yearning for a bit of excitement and stimulation. Even the conscious logical part of my brain is starting to feel more relaxed about the prospect of a relapse. I of course know this is an illusion, but at times this week it's felt a reality. I've questioned in the past what happens the the guys here that drift away. My theory is that THIS is what happens - it feels a natural human response as I adapt to change, and I know that I need to do something about it to avoid becoming one of the drift aways.

Needless to say, the Insta and Pintrest have now been deleted, and I'm currently unable to install apps/use private browsing as a result of the actions I took on Wednesday, so phone is now 100% secure. Incidentally, I have not told my wife, nor will I on this occasion - I am telling you all instead.

I know I get a lot of motivation from my 'counter' and did worry post 90 whether that would diminish. Perhaps that is a factor. My counter is staying intact on the basis that I have not M or O'd and sits at 120 days. I will however introduce a new 'circling counter' which will cover artificial stimulation including fantasy. If I don't do that, I can only see this behaviour escalating, normalising, and leading to relapse. So, today is day 1.

Beyond that, I'm not sure quite what to do. What's my goal now? A day at a time - that feels more a tactic than a goal. Feel like I need something more.

Would appreciate any pointers, thoughts or advice chaps. Hope you're all doing well and wishing you a good week.