Author Topic: I want to be as i was when i was a kid (The PMO hatas)  (Read 2808 times)

Arthur2

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Re: I want to be as i was when i was a kid (The PMO hatas)
« Reply #250 on: October 06, 2019, 02:12:24 PM »
Sorry man.

Day loser for me.

I just bought cold turkey website blocker.

Arthur2

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Re: I want to be as i was when i was a kid (The PMO hatas)
« Reply #251 on: October 06, 2019, 02:49:05 PM »



[edited] Cold turkey works. it is just a little bit unclear how to activate it because to block a list of websites, you have to activate a timer. I set it until may 2022

« Last Edit: October 06, 2019, 03:26:51 PM by Arthur2 »

Arthur2

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Re: I want to be as i was when i was a kid (The PMO hatas)
« Reply #252 on: October 09, 2019, 02:31:57 PM »
DAY 1
one, one, one, one one (singing) !!

Free-man

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Re: I want to be as i was when i was a kid (The PMO hatas)
« Reply #253 on: October 09, 2019, 04:43:08 PM »
Go for it man!

Arthur2

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Re: I want to be as i was when i was a kid (The PMO hatas)
« Reply #254 on: October 09, 2019, 05:18:47 PM »
Yes, i relapsed sunday night. What a shame. I could have easily avoided it. As always actually.

And then i was so upset that i finally bought the "cold turkey" software that efficiently blocks the websites that you tell it to block.

I fapped again (just with imagination) tuesday morning once, so that is why today is only day 1. But man, i am so upset i could already be on day 30 or something like that. I should already be there.

Anyway.
I keep going.

Arthur2

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Re: I want to be as i was when i was a kid (The PMO hatas)
« Reply #255 on: October 10, 2019, 06:02:19 PM »
Day 2

Chill

Free-man

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Re: I want to be as i was when i was a kid (The PMO hatas)
« Reply #256 on: October 11, 2019, 02:33:16 AM »
although it would seem a few days, they are 2 days away from the shit, step by step. Put little milestones and you will reach 200 :)
Stay strong Arthur

Arthur2

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Re: I want to be as i was when i was a kid (The PMO hatas)
« Reply #257 on: October 11, 2019, 05:39:26 PM »
Yes. Thank you, Free.

I like these two days.
As you said : two days away from the filth.

Day freakin 3

Swaag

Arthur2

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Re: I want to be as i was when i was a kid (The PMO hatas)
« Reply #258 on: October 11, 2019, 05:44:11 PM »
Tbh, i dont have much to say now.

I know everything i need to know as far as rebooting theory is concerned.
Now i just need to get past the 15 days mark, which i keep failing at since i started the journal two months ago.

I dont have much to say about cravings, feelings, learning experiences, etc...

I pretty much have already told everything in the previous pages.
Now i need to get past that damn two weeks mark in order to start experiencing new stuff.

God speed.

Arthur2

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Re: I want to be as i was when i was a kid (The PMO hatas)
« Reply #259 on: October 11, 2019, 05:45:25 PM »
In the meanwhile, well... I just need to freakin do it.

Or rather NOT do IT.

Arthur2

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Re: I want to be as i was when i was a kid (The PMO hatas)
« Reply #260 on: October 12, 2019, 06:54:07 PM »
4

Arthur2

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Re: I want to be as i was when i was a kid (The PMO hatas)
« Reply #261 on: October 13, 2019, 02:30:43 PM »
5

Do or die

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Re: I want to be as i was when i was a kid (The PMO hatas)
« Reply #262 on: October 13, 2019, 04:03:42 PM »
When you are at day 5 then your urges are at high level.
Your brain tricks so much for an relapse.
Day by day this compulsion decreases.
And at every new day you fight better.
So face each day as a new day.
Try to focus on your reboot and its benefits. Don't think too much about relapse .
Also overcome your fear of relapsing.
I also experienced this what you are experiencing now. I constantly relapsed in last 5 months. But i learned from every relapse. And see now i am on day 17 today.
So you can also do it. Just learn your behavior first, then the type of urges on which you relapsed. Make a plan for fighting your urges.
« Last Edit: October 13, 2019, 04:05:59 PM by Do or die »
Its not about stopping. Its about to accept that you are stopped it.

Arthur2

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Re: I want to be as i was when i was a kid (The PMO hatas)
« Reply #263 on: October 14, 2019, 01:54:40 PM »
Yes, i am feeling exactly that.
Urges.
Surprising, isnt it ?

Thank you for your encouragment Dod, and congrats for your 17 days.

For it is day6.

Damn it feels good to be a gangsta.

Arthur2

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Re: I want to be as i was when i was a kid (The PMO hatas)
« Reply #264 on: October 17, 2019, 05:25:23 PM »
Day 2

Hum

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Re: I want to be as i was when i was a kid (The PMO hatas)
« Reply #265 on: October 18, 2019, 01:24:44 AM »
What is the reason of your last relapse?
Its not about stopping. Its about to accept that you are stopped it.

Arthur2

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Re: I want to be as i was when i was a kid (The PMO hatas)
« Reply #266 on: October 18, 2019, 05:54:34 PM »
Same as usual.

I want soothing. I want to feel comfortable and i basically forget everything and fall in the trap of thinking that a little bit of rubbing is not gonna hurt. Of course this is bullshit and i end up relapsing.
But i didnt relapse to P. I just MOed 4 times in two days.
I really dont crave P that much. But i am super craving M.
My imagination does the rest of the job and i MO.

This is it.
Thank you for asking. Now day 3

Arthur2

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Re: I want to be as i was when i was a kid (The PMO hatas)
« Reply #267 on: October 18, 2019, 05:59:23 PM »
Really my fight is more against M, and not that much against P.
As i already mentionned, my use of P has been intermitent throughout the years, so i dont consider myself too much addicted to P.
But everything is ready in my head. Unlimited scenarios that i produce since i am a kid. My brain is actually really good at fantasizing about sex and inventing a sex that i dont actually do.
My problem is more a MO problem than a P problem.

That is why it will be so interresting to find out what i become on a nofap long streak.

Do or die

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Re: I want to be as i was when i was a kid (The PMO hatas)
« Reply #268 on: October 18, 2019, 08:30:37 PM »
Just see that you need something external events to feel happy to feel comfortable. So try meditation. If you become comfortable with your real life, when you totally accept your life then you'll be changed completely.
Its not about stopping. Its about to accept that you are stopped it.

Arthur2

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Re: I want to be as i was when i was a kid (The PMO hatas)
« Reply #269 on: October 18, 2019, 09:47:46 PM »
Alright.
So you mean i need to be comfortable in myself, without further need of external gratification ?

That makes sense. Thank you.

For me meditation will be prayer to God.


Arthur2

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Re: I want to be as i was when i was a kid (The PMO hatas)
« Reply #270 on: October 18, 2019, 09:48:58 PM »
Sidenote :

Do any know universal man on youtube ? He is a good analyst of the whole nofap journey.
His advice videos are very interresting.

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Re: I want to be as i was when i was a kid (The PMO hatas)
« Reply #271 on: October 19, 2019, 12:21:54 AM »
Alright.
So you mean i need to be comfortable in myself, without further need of external gratification ?

That makes sense. Thank you.

For me meditation will be prayer to God.
First focus on what you have. Then you achieve what you want.
Now you have only two things
1. Your PMO addiction
2. Your will power to be PMO free

So focus on your goal by using your will power. You be successful one day.
Its not about stopping. Its about to accept that you are stopped it.

Arthur2

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Re: I want to be as i was when i was a kid (The PMO hatas)
« Reply #272 on: October 19, 2019, 04:56:24 PM »
Day 4

Arthur2

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Re: I want to be as i was when i was a kid (The PMO hatas)
« Reply #273 on: October 20, 2019, 05:24:06 PM »
Day5

I feel angry tonight. As in restless.
Maybe a mixed effect of unfulfilled lust and being tired.
But i feel good overall. Mentaly speaking. This nofap journey is really me taking my life in my hands.

I would not say that i am proud to be able to have streaks like that, because really my streaks arent that great, but it is still an accomplishment, considering whence i come.

This time could be the good one. Really, why not. I know that i will go through severe withdrawals anyway.
Today i added a new website to my friend the website blocker "cold turkey".

Arthur2

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Re: I want to be as i was when i was a kid (The PMO hatas)
« Reply #274 on: October 21, 2019, 07:41:42 PM »
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