Author Topic: Things I need to do this for.  (Read 217 times)

fmymind123

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Things I need to do this for.
« on: July 29, 2019, 05:21:27 PM »
Day1.
I love my girlfriend.
I wanna have sex.
I wanna be more motivated.
I wanna be able to focus on the stuff im doing.
I want to be the person my family thinks I am.
Its day1. Lets see what happens.

squid

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Re: Things I need to do this for.
« Reply #1 on: July 29, 2019, 08:44:07 PM »
Day1.
I love my girlfriend.
I wanna have sex.
I wanna be more motivated.
I wanna be able to focus on the stuff im doing.
I want to be the person my family thinks I am.
Its day1. Lets see what happens.

In my experience, quiting porn will help with all of these a ton.  Nice work on making a commitment!  Post your thoughts on your journal every day, that's helped me a lot. 

Stay free my friend,

-squid

ogito123

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Re: Things I need to do this for.
« Reply #2 on: July 30, 2019, 02:56:52 AM »
Thank you! Good luck with your journey too!

ogito123

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Re: Things I need to do this for.
« Reply #3 on: July 30, 2019, 04:59:55 PM »
Okay so today wasn't so bad. I had some cravings but thankfully didn't yield to it. I am interning abroad now so I skyped my girlfriend. I also was productive in my free time. Solved 2 leetcode questions and 1 ctci question. So all is well today. Accept for the internship, I feel like im not progressing at all. gotta work harder during that. Hopefully tomorrow I can focus enough to  do it.

I must remember, when I want to peek its not just peeking
when I want to see if theres something new its not just that
Its always just porn and I should avoid it so I can be enjoying my regular life.

Also this is day 2. My first goal is to reach day 4, should be doable.
« Last Edit: July 30, 2019, 05:01:57 PM by ogito123 »

Lero

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Re: Things I need to do this for.
« Reply #4 on: July 30, 2019, 05:07:49 PM »
That's right. You have to stay away from anything that stimulates your porn pathway. This includes peeking, fantasizing, looking at pictures etc. You have to identify everything that you want to use for stimulation and stay away from it, especially when hard urges start because it was easy for me to think I had it, when my streak was 2 days, but not after 9 days my urges shoot through the roof and I have to be extra careful. One little moment of peeking could sabotage me.

BlueHeronFan

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Re: Things I need to do this for.
« Reply #5 on: July 30, 2019, 05:34:03 PM »
That's right. You have to stay away from anything that stimulates your porn pathway. This includes peeking, fantasizing, looking at pictures etc. You have to identify everything that you want to use for stimulation and stay away from it, especially when hard urges start because it was easy for me to think I had it, when my streak was 2 days, but not after 9 days my urges shoot through the roof and I have to be extra careful. One little moment of peeking could sabotage me.

This is really solid advice. I think a lot of people (me included) have to learn this the hard way through repeatedly rationalizing these smaller triggering behaviors as "okay" and then relapsing over and over. If you can take this advice to heart and really be careful about avoiding anything that triggers those porn-related dopamine pathways, you'll start off in a really strong place. It's not just about quitting porn, it's about healing from addiction of any kind.

ogito123

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Re: Things I need to do this for.
« Reply #6 on: July 31, 2019, 12:39:53 PM »
Day 3 going on. I masturbated today but WITHOUT porn. I had like %40 erection. Really sad that i am 22 and have an erection like that. Its okay though, it can recover if i keep this up. Tomorrow I will reach my first goal of 4 days.

Today I was again pretty productive, solved 2 leetcode questions and will do one more soon.

A great quote i saw today from Bruce Lee:
"Knowing is not enough, we must apply. Willing is not enough, we must do."

ogito123

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Re: Things I need to do this for.
« Reply #7 on: July 31, 2019, 06:17:19 PM »
Welp i messed up again. I feel disgusting. Idk whats wrong with me, one second everythings awesome the other im looking at porn. I need to change a lot on my life to fix this.

1) I WILL NOT USE MY LAPTOP IN BED.
2) WHEN I GET CRAVINGS I WILL LOOK AWAY FROM COMPUTER FOR 10 MINUTES.
3) I WILL LOOK AT THIS WEBSITE AT LEAST 10 MINUTES A DAY.

simple stuff right? I must be able to do this someway.
Day 1 again...

squid

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Re: Things I need to do this for.
« Reply #8 on: July 31, 2019, 10:14:31 PM »
Hang in there dude, it's great to see you making a plan from your relapse. 

ogito123

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Re: Things I need to do this for.
« Reply #9 on: August 24, 2019, 09:57:47 AM »
I know I haven't posted here in a while. But I just went 10 days without porn. Its been a really long while since I accomplished that. I failed today, but i still feel really good. Like I can do this if i try hard.

Even when I was looking at porn today it didn't feel as good as it did before. I know if i do it again and again i will fall to the old patterns of feeling like  I can't quit. So this week will be really important. I will do anything necessary to get through this week.  I will not relapse again today.

My next goal is 14 days. Obviously its actually infinite days but I am aiming for 14, than 1 month and so on. I CAN DO THIS.

I have been listening to the porn free radio on itunes. It helped me get my mind off porn most of the time. I shoulda given it a shot today too but i just didn't. this was a mistake and wont happen again.  I think I will try to be more active with my posts here this time too. I hope I can do this. Its just 2 weeks anyone should be able to do it. So I should be too!

Lero

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Re: Things I need to do this for.
« Reply #10 on: August 24, 2019, 11:24:21 AM »
I know I haven't posted here in a while. But I just went 10 days without porn. Its been a really long while since I accomplished that. I failed today, but i still feel really good. Like I can do this if i try hard.

Even when I was looking at porn today it didn't feel as good as it did before. I know if i do it again and again i will fall to the old patterns of feeling like  I can't quit. So this week will be really important. I will do anything necessary to get through this week.  I will not relapse again today.

My next goal is 14 days. Obviously its actually infinite days but I am aiming for 14, than 1 month and so on. I CAN DO THIS.

I have been listening to the porn free radio on itunes. It helped me get my mind off porn most of the time. I shoulda given it a shot today too but i just didn't. this was a mistake and wont happen again.  I think I will try to be more active with my posts here this time too. I hope I can do this. Its just 2 weeks anyone should be able to do it. So I should be too!

That's right. You will realize that you actually can do more than you think you can. A certain number of days might seem scary in the beginning but once you reach it, it's not scary anymore. You can push past that to accomplish a longer streak. In my case, I didn't think I could even realize an 8 days streak, because my best had been 7 days. And now I have 34 days without a relapse, it's way beyond my limit already. Things are not so scary anymore.

ogito123

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Re: Things I need to do this for.
« Reply #11 on: August 25, 2019, 12:31:32 PM »
I know I haven't posted here in a while. But I just went 10 days without porn. Its been a really long while since I accomplished that. I failed today, but i still feel really good. Like I can do this if i try hard.

Even when I was looking at porn today it didn't feel as good as it did before. I know if i do it again and again i will fall to the old patterns of feeling like  I can't quit. So this week will be really important. I will do anything necessary to get through this week.  I will not relapse again today.

My next goal is 14 days. Obviously its actually infinite days but I am aiming for 14, than 1 month and so on. I CAN DO THIS.

I have been listening to the porn free radio on itunes. It helped me get my mind off porn most of the time. I shoulda given it a shot today too but i just didn't. this was a mistake and wont happen again.  I think I will try to be more active with my posts here this time too. I hope I can do this. Its just 2 weeks anyone should be able to do it. So I should be too!

That's right. You will realize that you actually can do more than you think you can. A certain number of days might seem scary in the beginning but once you reach it, it's not scary anymore. You can push past that to accomplish a longer streak. In my case, I didn't think I could even realize an 8 days streak, because my best had been 7 days. And now I have 34 days without a relapse, it's way beyond my limit already. Things are not so scary anymore.

Thank so much for the reply. Congratz on your progress. I will try not to fall too far behind you!

ogito123

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Re: Things I need to do this for.
« Reply #12 on: August 27, 2019, 02:19:40 PM »
Its 8.17. I got 3 hours and 43 minutes till I finish the day. So how will I get through it. I already solved leetcode and dont  feel like solving more, I already ate, and watched my usual youtube videos. I will probably play same games on my pc thinking don't starve, if i get bored from it i will netflix, after that I will youtube and reddit till I sleep. I know these are all not productive stuff but I have already done productive stuff today and need to fill the happy part of my brain too. Only 3 and a half hours left. No matter what I can get through those 3 and a half hours. So thats the goal, get through 3.30 hours. I can do this.

ogito123

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Re: Things I need to do this for.
« Reply #13 on: August 29, 2019, 01:37:52 AM »
I woke up from sexual dreams today. didn't come but i am craving. Its 8.30 am right now. I got a long day ahead of me. So how will I get through this day. I got work between 10-12.30 today, after that I will eat and then come back home, i should be home around 2. gonna skype parents, talk to gf. I am travelling back to my country tomorrow so I need to pack up. I am going to sleep when I feel horny and I will play games to distract myself. Also going to youtube. These are not enough to get me through 12 hours but I also have to do leetcode for 1.30 hours today. stuff to watch on youtube should take another 1 hour. I can watch a movie on netflix for anpther 1.30 hours.That still adds up to around 6.30 so thats not enough. I will listen to pornfree radio for 30 minutes thats 7 pm now. I think i will try to delay when I get home because 5 hours of unacounted time is t oo long. I can do this though.