Author Topic: Reboot Derailed?  (Read 537 times)

WoundedSparrow

  • Member

  • Offline
  • ***

  • 140
    • View Profile
Reboot Derailed?
« on: March 27, 2019, 08:12:31 PM »
I'm a little over a month into a hard reboot (my last 30-day run was November) and I've hit a snag. Recently, the adverse effects of withdrawal have been creeping in, most notably irritability, intrusive thoughts, and most recently, cravings for porn. Last night I resisted the urge to PMO but had a dream in which I relapsed. Tonight, I couldn't fully resist. I've just begun dating someone new and I didn't want to relapse or cheat on her (in my mind) so I masturbated to the mental image of her and I fooling around, which we've done a bit of. I didn't think of it in a pornographic way, just mostly from memory. What does this mean going forward? Past experience tells me that I should be on my guard since MO has traditionally given way to PMO, but I'm wondering if anyone else on here has had similar experiences and can advise me moving forward. Thanks.

screwedup40

  • Member

  • Offline
  • ***

  • 109
    • View Profile
Re: Reboot Derailed?
« Reply #1 on: March 27, 2019, 09:14:37 PM »
I would say it's definitely a better option than pmo.  I've found, for myself, that MO to even realistic memories usually sets me back.  I'm also usually craving porn for a week or so afterwards as well.  But everyone's different and the important thing is you stayed away from the porn.  Just be careful about a chaser and keep moving forward. My two ยข
Been rebooting since May 2015.  A handful of relapses in that time.  Have SLOWLY improved since then.  Finally starting to see some lasting success since summer of 2018.

DoneAtLast

  • Member

  • Offline
  • *****

  • 521
    • View Profile
Re: Reboot Derailed?
« Reply #2 on: March 28, 2019, 09:31:26 PM »
Don't beat yourself up, but don't lull yourself into thinking that it is okay either.  You're satisfying yourself to something that isn't real.  Even if the image in your imagination has a bit more basis in reality than internet porn, it is still artificial.

It is very hard to detangle real stuff from fake stuff, and the addiction brain really only understands stimulation, so stimulating real stuff and leaving the fake stuff might make sense when we consciously consider it, but our brains don't really get it.  It is a slippery slope, and I would avoid anything when it isn't 100% real.  Besides, if you play the justification game, porn is "real" if you work your way backwards enough steps.  Your "fooling around" with your girlfriend was real at the time, but once you created a mental image to MO to, you made it fake.  Does that make sense?

I'd also warn against pushing her (or anyone else) too hard physically in an effort to speed up a reboot.  Yeah, we want to replace fake stuff with real stuff, but if we take something without it being offered, we're not doing anyone any favors.  I speak from experience on that one.  Quitting PMO can make you feel like you have a physical contact vacuum inside of you, and you crave it so much. 

zohesa

  • Member

  • Offline
  • *

  • 4
    • View Profile
Re: Reboot Derailed?
« Reply #3 on: April 10, 2019, 05:32:16 AM »
Best way to log in 192.168.1.254 on router