Author Topic: Hello  (Read 752 times)

AlexReborn

  • Member

  • Offline
  • *

  • 2
    • View Profile
Hello
« on: November 22, 2019, 02:18:16 PM »
Hello
I am Alex 36 years old male (Italian) from Belfast. I decided to share my experience and challenges here in the hope to find some strength and a bit more understanding in what could be wrong with me.
I am ashamed to admit that I am heavily addicted to masturbation, I think I have always been, but over the last 8 months it has gotten much worse. I would have 2 to 3 sessions every day or more.. now this might not sound much, but I was into edging for hours on end, sometimes when I had the chance almost all day with a few breaks in between! lately I haven't been able to even have a lie in since I felt the urge to start the day in my own ways. This addiction brought me to use poppers, then Viagra e then again poppers until a few days ago. I have been declining activities with my partner and friend...everything was spinning around masturbation :( The problem is that since I started masturbating even more, I started noticing a decline in my memory and focus in general. At work the telephone would ring and I would forget the name on the other side soon after..like a second after they told me!! chronic fatigue an no interest or enthusiasm for anything other than masturbating. The works part is that I have started to have visual symptoms, like VISUAL SNOW (static in my vision) and afterimages :(( I Don't know if the cause of that was the Viagra or my physical exhaustion and brain chemicals imbalance?!  When I went on holiday for three weeks and came back home...my vision was a bit better ( I could not masturbate for hours as I usually would )… I don't know if that was linked to the less time spent edging..but over the last two week I bought poppers and masturbated way much more...to the point of being dry in every meaning of the world. My Visual snow worsened again and the afterimages too!! I now decided to try to stop doing what I was doing in the hope of having my life back and my a clearer vision too :(( It is aweful because I tried in the past but failed miserably after 2 days!!! today I was good and at 24 hours and a half I still don't feel much of a urge to do it..but tomorrow?! … Does anybody here know VISUAL SNOW? could there be a link with over masturbating? 
Sorry for the length of the post and the detailed description...but I need to have some clarity and honesty from now on :)

noFapFitzgerald

  • Member

  • Offline
  • *

  • 12
  • Personal Text
    Enjoying the journey and learning as I go.
    • View Profile
Re: Hello
« Reply #1 on: November 23, 2019, 01:19:16 AM »
I think there's a lot of merit to the notion that excessive ejaculation depletes one's body of minerals, enzymes, etc. In Qigong, semen referred to as Jing (精). This is thought to be one's "essence" or "spirit". In Ayurveda, retaining semen is a wonderful way to produce and retain ojas, which are said to be the internally-generated antidote to aging.

I'm by no means saying I know for sure that not masturbating means that you'll see clearer though. I wouldn't be afraid to go to a doctor if you're feeling really freaked out by it.

logicprox

  • Member

  • Offline
  • *

  • 19
    • View Profile
Re: Hello
« Reply #2 on: November 23, 2019, 11:54:28 AM »
I'm no expert, only 23 days PMO free here, but I would say try to drop the shame. Shame is a horrible motivator. It's a negative emotion driving to use. One thing that's really helped me on my longest streak (current) is a shift in my mindset. I'm not ashamed of it, I'm just aware of the brain chemistry driving it, admitting I have gotten sucked into it, and focusing on how I want my brain to function (ie. not addicted to ever decreasing dopamine rushes).

If you haven't already I would check out the videos here: https://www.yourbrainonporn.com/videos-articles/

For the first couple weeks every time I got an urge I would just search for videos about the PMO problem or other people's success stories and watch those a lot. Really seemed to help, and for me the urges started to subside (not disappear, but decrease) after about 2 weeks. It's getting easier now. I can't speak for everyone, but this has been working for me.

AlexReborn

  • Member

  • Offline
  • *

  • 2
    • View Profile
Re: Hello
« Reply #3 on: November 23, 2019, 02:53:17 PM »
Thanks guys....I'll keep strong...and if I fail sometimes it will still be ok, as long as I don't waste entire days every day, masturbating and edging. It's been over 48 hour now...and the urge is getting stronger....I was very close to do it today but I have managed to refrain myself!