Author Topic: A message from a 38 year old man to the teen forum  (Read 1373 times)

PE30

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A message from a 38 year old man to the teen forum
« on: April 17, 2018, 07:42:46 AM »
Hiya. If you're sat there thinking "I want to give up porn," think of it this way.

I'm a 38 year old man, and I wish I'd said no to porn when I was your age. But I didn't. Or more like, I said no, and then said yes again, and then said no, and yes, and no, and yes, and no, and yes... and in the years between the ages of 16 (when I first nicked a porn mag from my brother's bedside drawer) to the age of 38, I was trapped in a cycle of revulsion, repentance and relapse.

And this habit developed from magazines, to the internet, to chat rooms, to Skype and other messaging services, to actually meeting up with someone from online and having sex with them in a hotel room whilst my wife thought that I was away on a work conference.

And when it all came to light, I nearly lost everything. I could have lost my marriage, my job, my children, the reputation I'd built up over the years... I lost so much when it all came to light but I was able to rebuild.

And if you look on the 30s / 40s forums, you'll see many other guys like me. Some of us have managed to make things right; some of us have ended up wrecking their whole lives. There are people who have ended up arrested for possession of child porn... there are people who have ended up down all kinds of avenues that their teenage selves would have never thought likely.

So please, make a choice today. And keep making that choice. When you're depressed, make that choice. When you've been dumped, make that choice. When you're a bit tired and horny, make that choice. If one person reads this and makes a life-time choice to stay away from porn, then I'll be pleased.
Porn free since 2 February 2018.

Fighting on.

Jones

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Re: A message from a 38 year old man to the teen forum
« Reply #1 on: April 17, 2018, 08:14:35 PM »
This is inspiring. I feel like I have the drive to give this shit up now. :)

Kinlor

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Re: A message from a 38 year old man to the teen forum
« Reply #2 on: April 18, 2018, 02:05:02 AM »
Go forth and conquer!

PE30

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Re: A message from a 38 year old man to the teen forum
« Reply #3 on: May 22, 2018, 03:39:26 PM »
 Bumping this. Am still clean.
Porn free since 2 February 2018.

Fighting on.

Jones

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Re: A message from a 38 year old man to the teen forum
« Reply #4 on: May 25, 2018, 07:40:32 PM »
How many days u on?

PE30

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Re: A message from a 38 year old man to the teen forum
« Reply #5 on: May 26, 2018, 03:14:38 AM »
I'm on day 113.
Porn free since 2 February 2018.

Fighting on.

bloom7

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Re: A message from a 38 year old man to the teen forum
« Reply #6 on: June 14, 2018, 12:00:59 AM »
Sometimes I feel like this will be my life forever. Constantly in an argument with myself over porn. Your message is very motivational and inspiring. Thank you for this. I hope all is well for you.

PE30

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Re: A message from a 38 year old man to the teen forum
« Reply #7 on: June 14, 2018, 04:42:20 AM »
You can be free of this. I'm on day 132.
Porn free since 2 February 2018.

Fighting on.

HumbleRich

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Re: A message from a 38 year old man to the teen forum
« Reply #8 on: June 14, 2018, 07:44:09 AM »
I just want to add to this message.  So Hi, from a 32 year old man.  Damn do I wish, every frickin day that I had decided when I was your age to stop for good.  Or to not even start.  I started this journey of getting away from porn when I was in college, at nineteen or twenty years old. 

If you are in high school and you think this addiction will not royally screw with your academics and social life, you are dead wrong.  It does.

I started college with a 3.5, by my the last term of my sophmore year, I was at a 1.0.  I managed to bring it back up to 3.6 by the time I graduated, but my cumulative remained a 2.8. 

Mind you, I am both a recovering alcoholic and a recovering porn addict and both were involved in the fall of my gpa.

I just wasn't interested in anything besides getting through the day so I could drink and jerk off to porn.

I didn't have a girlfriend in college until my Junior year and we dated for those last two years.  There were probably girls that would have been interested, but I was oblivious and so far in a brain fog that my social acumen was as deeply affected as my gpa.

Basically, get away now.  You will not miss anything.

You will do better academically if you do not use alcohol, porn, or drugs while you are in college.  You will be more focused and more involved socially.  Heck, even your dating life will be better, as you will be more deeply committed to women you date, more interested in them as people, and more mature and developed sexually.  Not having that porn lens will allow you to take your time getting to known someone, intimately, deeply, as well as sexually.  Believe me, women will appreciate it.

Make the decision now to get rid of porn addiction.  You will not regret it.

Rich

ruuddejong

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Re: A message from a 38 year old man to the teen forum
« Reply #9 on: February 03, 2019, 01:52:43 AM »
This thread deserves to be up there. I wish I quit 10 years ago or never started!

Edit_undo

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Re: A message from a 38 year old man to the teen forum
« Reply #10 on: February 03, 2019, 08:46:56 AM »
Just found this post- agree with all of it. I’m 32 yrs, almost a year clean. 12+ yrs in the cycle of trying to escape porn - repulsed, repent, relapsed, repeat. Drop it while you’re young. Start recovering now.

changemylife

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Re: A message from a 38 year old man to the teen forum
« Reply #11 on: February 05, 2019, 05:18:52 PM »
Hiya. If you're sat there thinking "I want to give up porn," think of it this way.

I'm a 38 year old man, and I wish I'd said no to porn when I was your age. But I didn't. Or more like, I said no, and then said yes again, and then said no, and yes, and no, and yes, and no, and yes... and in the years between the ages of 16 (when I first nicked a porn mag from my brother's bedside drawer) to the age of 38, I was trapped in a cycle of revulsion, repentance and relapse.

And this habit developed from magazines, to the internet, to chat rooms, to Skype and other messaging services, to actually meeting up with someone from online and having sex with them in a hotel room whilst my wife thought that I was away on a work conference.

And when it all came to light, I nearly lost everything. I could have lost my marriage, my job, my children, the reputation I'd built up over the years... I lost so much when it all came to light but I was able to rebuild.

And if you look on the 30s / 40s forums, you'll see many other guys like me. Some of us have managed to make things right; some of us have ended up wrecking their whole lives. There are people who have ended up arrested for possession of child porn... there are people who have ended up down all kinds of avenues that their teenage selves would have never thought likely.

So please, make a choice today. And keep making that choice. When you're depressed, make that choice. When you've been dumped, make that choice. When you're a bit tired and horny, make that choice. If one person reads this and makes a life-time choice to stay away from porn, then I'll be pleased.

+1000 for this!

Coming from a 28 years old guy who had nobody to tell me this when I was 16.