Author Topic: The summer of a dormouse  (Read 1184 times)

Moth-head

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Re: The summer of a dormouse
« Reply #50 on: June 25, 2018, 04:03:23 PM »
Day 120

Had a couple of close calls over the last couple of days.

The first was a job offer I had to do an erotic drawing for an old client. He was offering good money, but I knew his stuff was pretty NSFW, so I told him I was only taking on jobs that were not sexual. It was tempting, because I could convince myself it was only for a job, but I know that I have to get reference pics for these types of drawings and those pics have, in the past, always come from porn. my drawing sessions were very often accompanied, if not over taken by, extended porn sessions. In the end I turned the job down. Client was not happy, but I think I saved myself from a big pitfall.

The second was some research I am doing for a story I am writing. It involves some risque films made in the 1920s. I wanted to do a little research to see the kind of thing they had in those films. I was expecting flapper girls, possibly in their underwear. Who knew they made porn in the 1920s? It also took me onto a porn site with loads of links to other videos. I canned the thumbnails, but got out of there pretty quickly.

I feel guilty that I ended up on a porn site, and part of me knows that when I clicked the link I was probably going to end up on said porn site. I am happy I was able to shut it down though before any PMO was attempted.

Apparently I am not to be trusted at the moment, so I am entering a state of heightened vigilance.

Until next time...

Moth-head

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Re: The summer of a dormouse
« Reply #51 on: July 11, 2018, 03:59:20 PM »
Day 135

Just a quick check in to say I fought through the tough times. Once the stressed dropped away the urges mostly went with it. It also helped to get away for a while and have a break somewhere with limited internet access. Now that I am back ad rested, I seem to be having some smooth sailing again. Really eager to reach my 6 month goal now!

Moth-head

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Re: The summer of a dormouse
« Reply #52 on: July 16, 2018, 03:11:08 PM »
Day 140

Entered some dangerous territory. Had to do some research of figure poses for an art commission I was working on. Found my way back into a porn site and got blasted with some very graphic pop ups. the good news is I managed to ignore the pop ups and the urge to fap. I did a bit longer than I would have liked getting the reference pics though, and I will have to reconsider that kind of work. I thought it would be okay because it involved only implied nudes. Unfortunately there is not a lot of gray area on the Internet between what might go in a sports illustrated swimwear edition and would make even a hardened pornstar go a bit weak at the knees. I have to remember that.

Anyway, the upside is there was no edging or PMO and I got out of there and have not gone back. I am rededicating myself to projects that do not require me to draw scantily clad women, even though that is a genre I particularly enjoy working in, and has proven to be one of my most lucrative over the years.

I had an old client write to me the other day to ask me to do the kind of work I used to do and I had to turn him down because, as I explained, It would require me to do some research on porn sites to draw the right poses, etc. He was pretty pissed off and it was hard to turn down a paying job, but I feel stronger that I did it. He was unwilling to hire me to draw something less sexual and I am pretty certain I have lost a client. I have been trying to adjust my output, but I am not attracting as many clients as I did when I was drawing more explicit stuff. Hopefully this changes, or else I can develop a new outlet for my talents, because it is really nice to get paid for work I enjoy doing anyway.

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Re: The summer of a dormouse
« Reply #53 on: July 19, 2018, 03:42:12 PM »
Day 143

I just want to reiterate, for anyone out there still having doubts. Sex post reboot is infinitely better.

The times I have been having sex with the wife have been so much better. No ED and no DE.

Last night the wife was on top, which is something I have had problems with in the past due to not being able to maintain an solid erection throughout/ This time it was incredible, definitely one of the best sexual experiences of my life. Great to know I don;t have to be stuck with missionary my whole life just because it was the only was I could keep a decent hard on.

And, I have said it before, it is way more intense when you are actually present and not flicking through your porn highlights reel looking to speed up your DE. It makes sex fun again.

Wishing all of you rebooters similar success.