Author Topic: Life Alteration after identifying PMO as the problem  (Read 919 times)

RealityCheck

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Life Alteration after identifying PMO as the problem
« on: January 08, 2019, 11:32:37 AM »
I will get right to the point.

I suffered for a few years with a lack of sexual confidence.  Even though I had no problem getting erections when I watched porn, I had some difficulty with women I was getting intimate with, and it would get particularly difficult when it came time to put on a condom and/or vaginal penetration. This made me less eager to initiate and try to get a woman to sleep with me, the lack of experience led my lack of confidence, making me worse at seduction, and the negative cycle continued.

I also suffered from a lack of productivity.  I would spend hours a day maybe not on porn, but certainly about fantasizing.  I got a lot of short term joy out of planning what kinds of sexual adventures I would seek out on the internet, what pictures I could find and create a story around that would arouse me.  I would think about these things in the middle of a work day.

On August 23rd, 2017, I had a root canal.  While I was sitting in the chair, I decided it was a good time to fantasize to get my mind off of what was being shoved in my mouth.  I had fantasized so much in the past, and my fantasies were so real, that I actually came without touching myself.  The dentists didn't notice, and while part of me was impressed with my own vivid imagination, it scared me a little that I had given myself access to this fantasy world that could feel so real.  I went online that night to see if there were any negative affects of fantasizing too much.

That's when I found this community.  That's when I found that the reason I wasn't performing as well in bed, and had less focus throughout the day, was because of PMO and fanstasizing.  That realization was enough to motivate me to identify PMO as something I needed to get control over.

I made it 61 days on my first try of the reboot.  In that time, I established a vigorous morning routine, I quit my job, taught myself a highly-technical skill, and have started my own business.  I have slept with more beautiful women since rebooting than I did previously, and every one of them orgasms every time I have sex with them, and I haven't had one issue getting aroused. 

I also probably met my wife.  This past March, we were at a social event for young people in my religious community, and she became interested in me when we went around the circle sharing something interesting about ourselves, and I talked about my morning routine.

I am a scientist, and I keep track of how productive I am and why.  I have found that my productivity SKYROCKETS when it's been a few days from having a sexual release.  The correlation is ridiculous.  The exercise in will power to stay away from PMO translates into EVERY other area of life, such that you can do the responsible thing and grant yourself delayed gratification (which is almost always best) when you are exercising that mental muscle on a moment-to-moment basis by resisting a very natural urge to PMO.

If I could give one piece of encouragement to those of you struggling with an addiction to PMO, let it be this: while staying away from PMO is difficult, it is a simple change that will resonate in other areas of your life.  Get to know yourself and what you need to do to prevent yourself from relapsing.  ALWAYS keep in mind WHY you want to stop.  If you do relapse, think about how that fleeting, good feeling for a few seconds isn't worth you losing confidence for the rest of the time.

I don't mean to sound arrogant, I do consider myself to be a success story. I'm not all the way off PMO, but I've got it under control and have turned my life around because of how I overcame my addiction.  Feel free to IM me if you have questions or are in need of encouragement. 

Ollie

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Re: Life Alteration after identifying PMO as the problem
« Reply #1 on: January 13, 2019, 01:56:11 AM »
Thanks for sharing, keep getting better

joepanic

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Re: Life Alteration after identifying PMO as the problem
« Reply #2 on: January 13, 2019, 08:39:31 PM »
How often do you pmo  or view porn today

Reborn16

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Re: Life Alteration after identifying PMO as the problem
« Reply #3 on: January 17, 2019, 09:56:31 PM »
Thank you for the encouraging post!

Given your professional background, it's interesting to hear how you tracked your days and productivity. It's easy to become complacent after a few weeks, and lose perspective of how being PMO free is changing us for the better in many ways. Hopefully this habit sees a lot more research going forward.

Cheers