Author Topic: Live call-in show for partners  (Read 1251 times)

Emerald Blue

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Live call-in show for partners
« on: July 28, 2017, 10:40:23 AM »
http://www.blogtalkradio.com/thebutterflynation

The first show is on 5 August at 3pm Eastern Central Time.

I discovered this through listening to an interview with Alison, an ex partner of a sex addict, on the most recent podcast at The Mindful Habit, which is a resource for porn and sex addicts. The details are on her website at https://www.thebutterflyhabit.com/#/thebutterflynatiojn/

I don't live in the US and my search for Eastern Central Time comes up with either Eastern Time or Central Time, so I don't really know what time that is where I am (GMT +1) but I'm
hoping that I can listen online. It's good to know there is more support and information for partners, and more partners and ex partners are telling it like it is.
« Last Edit: July 28, 2017, 10:59:22 AM by Emerald Blue »
His porn addiction: you didn't cause it - you can't control it - you can't cure it

aquarius25

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Re: Live call-in show for partners
« Reply #1 on: July 28, 2017, 10:27:20 PM »
Don't know if you can see what time things post on your time but I am
Posting at 11:24 my time (eastern time, USA).  There are different time zones that are : eastern, central, mountain, and pacific. The stagger backward 1 hr from eastern time. Hope that makes sense. That also for sharing I will try to tune in.

Worst case addit up as if it is eastern and if that isn't right than try again in an hr. Good luck.

Gracie

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Re: Live call-in show for partners
« Reply #2 on: July 30, 2017, 06:11:19 AM »
It will be 9 pm in London if it is 4 pm in New York.  3 pm is central time. It is one hour behind New York time.

Emerald Blue

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Re: Live call-in show for partners
« Reply #3 on: July 31, 2017, 10:33:31 AM »
Thanks! As long as it's not in the middle of the night. Should be an interesting listen. I'm glad to see more support for partners of PAs and SAs, because there's too much of this "all men watch porn so suck it up" reaction that just isolates partners even more. With more women going public about it, I'm certain we'll start to see a real shift toward "porn addiction can damage relationships".
His porn addiction: you didn't cause it - you can't control it - you can't cure it

Emerald Blue

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Re: Live call-in show for partners
« Reply #4 on: August 11, 2017, 10:11:52 AM »
The show is available as a podcast from Apple (and it's free) so you can catch up later if you can't listen to it live. I'd really like to see a podcast show specifically for partners so I really hope this one takes off.
His porn addiction: you didn't cause it - you can't control it - you can't cure it

Emerald Blue

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Re: Live call-in show for partners
« Reply #5 on: August 11, 2017, 06:10:51 PM »
Yes, that's the other line of attack, that we're some kind of uptight/controlling/insecure women with outdated moral views, or some kind of variation on that. Well.... I would say that my partner was the one who controlled the situation through lies and deception, and ignoring my feelings. He was the one withholding sex. His worst fear was being found out or caught in the act, so how's that for being uptight about sexuality? He was the one who couldn't (and still can't) talk openly about sex, and he certainly can't talk about masturbation. He's the one who feared I would leave him if he was found out. So there you have all those traits in a porn addict that are typically ascribed to the partner. As for a healthy expression of male sexuality.... erectile dysfunction during 'real' sex is normal and healthy and 'male'? I don't think so. I wasted too many years sucking it up. Not any more.
His porn addiction: you didn't cause it - you can't control it - you can't cure it

Kimba

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Re: Live call-in show for partners
« Reply #6 on: August 11, 2017, 10:05:16 PM »
Yep same for me, first line of defense is attack, so I got the works burger, all my mates watch it, you've let yourself go, it's no big deal... He soon GOT IT when this time I did not let it go, I have pushed on this issue coming up a year, I have also told him that if anyone we know tried to tell me that Porn in a relationship is ok I will not stand by quietly !!  When it first happened I tried to be adult about it lol and say it's ok just tell me what's going on and that you'll leave it behind we can work through this together and like u EB Nothing no dialogue absolutely no omissions on any level and when I said I felt out of control meaning absolutely devastated he Jumped on that remark and said see your trying to control me haha yeah right the only thing I wanted to control was my destiny and I was feeling he wasn't a part of it ...  Again like u EB he is sexually stunted and I believe it's the Porn. I'm the adventurous one, it's a crime what Porn has done. Take care my fellow SO's fight the good fight x
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Emerald Blue

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Re: Live call-in show for partners
« Reply #7 on: August 12, 2017, 09:50:14 AM »
Quote
you've let yourself go

Hahaha! What do these guys actually see in the mirror? Some young, muscular, toned body with a washboard stomach? Chances are, they never looked like that when they were 20 so they're not going to look like that at 40 or 50. But more importantly, do we expect our men to look like that? And if they don't, do we feel entitled to go seeking out these perfectly male toned bodies when they don't?

It's not a healthy attitude anyway. We all grow older. Even men. (Yes! Really!) Body image is a very complex issue anyway, but when a relationship has been impacted porn addiction it becomes almost impossible for the partner to have a positive attitude towards body image, sexuality and the ageing process. I found it immensely difficult to accept physicality in a healthy and positive way when my husband replaced our sexual relationship with his own exclusive relationship with porn. I was perfectly at ease with growing into a more mature sexuality and gaining a different perspective on looks and beauty that wasn't defined through 'youthfulness'. But once you bring porn into the mix, the definition of what is 'sexy' is so narrowly defined and largely lacking in imagination and creativity, where every woman is eternally 22 AND … that's all your spouse is interested in… how can you maintain a positive attitude about your own sexuality and body image as you move towards maturity? But here's the interesting thing. It wasn't until my husband quit porn that he realised that he was older and that he'd reached a different life stage. I wasn't the one who'd "let themselves go"!!!

His porn addiction: you didn't cause it - you can't control it - you can't cure it