Author Topic: Lie detector  (Read 1504 times)

Mayer

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Lie detector
« on: April 16, 2017, 03:44:38 PM »
Has anyone had a lie detector test before. My wife wants me to get one but I am afraid it will say I am lying when I am not. I know they are not 100 percent accurate. I worried it will make things worse in an already struggling relationship.

achilles heel

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Re: Lie detector
« Reply #1 on: April 16, 2017, 04:09:40 PM »
Has anyone had a lie detector test before. My wife wants me to get one but I am afraid it will say I am lying when I am not. I know they are not 100 percent accurate. I worried it will make things worse in an already struggling relationship.

If your level of trust has dropped to the point where she'd rather believe a machine than believe you, how is there any future for your relationship anyway? You're not a criminal and deserve to be respected.

Gracie

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Re: Lie detector
« Reply #2 on: April 16, 2017, 06:31:23 PM »
Actually I believe this has been done a few times in couples counseling.  The PA absolutely told the truth and the wife was relieved.  You need to understand that when a wife has no knowledge of porn use or how bad it has become, it feels to us that we have been living a lie.  We weren't included in the decision to exclude us from our sex life.  So I woild say if you have been truthful with her you have nothing to fear. 

Numez

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Re: Lie detector
« Reply #3 on: April 16, 2017, 06:33:24 PM »
yeah its hard to believe someone who is addicted i agree but you didnt mentioned what she wants to ask you about? porn use?

Mayer

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Re: Lie detector
« Reply #4 on: April 17, 2017, 05:28:40 PM »
I don't know what she will ask. I would think mainly about porn use. I have reservations about the lie detector bringing forward incorrect results, but I suppose we will deal with that as it comes along. I know she can't trust me right now which is completely understandable. So I will do whatever is necessary to rebuild that trust.

AppleJack

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Re: Lie detector
« Reply #5 on: April 17, 2017, 07:06:12 PM »
Has anyone had a lie detector test before. My wife wants me to get one but I am afraid it will say I am lying when I am not. I know they are not 100 percent accurate. I worried it will make things worse in an already struggling relationship.

If your level of trust has dropped to the point where she'd rather believe a machine than believe you, how is there any future for your relationship anyway? You're not a criminal and deserve to be respected.

Ive been lied to for 16 years so yeah I would rather trust a machine, what sane person wouldn't. The idea is it proves the lies have stopped and it's commonly used by csats as part of recovery, otherwise all I have is the words of a liar that the lying has stopped lol. It's suppose to be about making me feel safe, and it's come as a last resort not a first request when found. No he's not a criminal but he has lost all my respect, shit behaviours get you shit consequences

Mayer

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Re: Lie detector
« Reply #6 on: April 17, 2017, 08:12:18 PM »
Hey, Achilles heel, at this moment I don't deserve any respect, due to the lying and deception on my part. I would prefer a more accurate machine, I think I am also lying to myself about some things so the answers will definitely be interesting, maybe they will help me realise things and progress my recovery. We will see.

Abc

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Re: Lie detector
« Reply #7 on: April 17, 2017, 11:21:37 PM »
Mayer, I think they are fairly accurate. I dont know your situation but I think it could help build some trust back if you dont have anything to hide. I was a cocaine addict and I totally get what your saying about lying to your self I got to where I lied about everything and got to the point where I think everything out of my mouth was a lie. I think we do so much damage to our relationships and our Sos I think we need to do what ever they ask to help get the trust back. IMHO if you dont have anything to hide I think you should do it.