Author Topic: Journey to a better me  (Read 41034 times)

Jake323

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Re: Journey to a better me
« Reply #75 on: May 23, 2017, 09:45:40 PM »
5/23/17

Pretty good day overall. Got a lot of things done that needed to be done, went to the gym, returned a package, turned in some stuff for work, bought a new stereo deck for my car, and bought a plane ticket for a trip I'm taking in July.

Jake323

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Re: Journey to a better me
« Reply #76 on: May 24, 2017, 09:42:40 PM »
5/24/17

Pretty ok day except for my weight training session, my gains have hit a brick wall. I'll be making more money and working more to save up and move out of my house, so that's good. Only a matter of time now.

Jake323

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Re: Journey to a better me
« Reply #77 on: May 25, 2017, 09:40:40 PM »
5/25/17

Finally got some really good sleep and felt refreshed, however, I'm having problems getting my point across at work due to social anxiety. It's hard to get your point across by not being too passive and not being too much of a jerk at the same time, just gotta keep working on it I guess.

Jake323

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Re: Journey to a better me
« Reply #78 on: May 26, 2017, 10:54:03 PM »
5/26/17

A good day, got some great sleep again, flirted with this girl who was cutting my hair, and felt as if I was doing better at work. Although one thing I constantly question is what I want my life to be about, I think I'm headed in the right direction, but it can be confusing because I may think I know what I want, but it may not be what I expect it to be or my values and preferences may change over time, it's confusing at times, it's hard to know what you want when there's so many choices and directions you can go.......

Jake323

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Re: Journey to a better me
« Reply #79 on: May 28, 2017, 12:18:07 AM »
5/27/17

Pretty crappy day, I'm discouraged about a lot of things.

Jake323

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Re: Journey to a better me
« Reply #80 on: May 28, 2017, 09:08:18 PM »
5/28/17

Work was stressful, but I'm slowly starting to do better at it, which is a good sign.

Jake323

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Re: Journey to a better me
« Reply #81 on: May 29, 2017, 11:08:25 PM »
5/29/17

Pretty good day, went to the mall and talked to some people that were working there, it's amazing how much better things go when you talk to people just for fun rather than putting a ton of pressure on myself to say the right things, try to make the other person like me, etc. Also went to the gym and had a pretty productive day.

Jake323

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Re: Journey to a better me
« Reply #82 on: May 30, 2017, 09:02:18 PM »
5/30/17

Kind of a boring day, ready to get back into things soon. I feel terrible too, I have a giant headache.

IAddict

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Re: Journey to a better me
« Reply #83 on: May 30, 2017, 11:24:25 PM »
hey jake,

Just curious, what day are you on? I see your posts every day when I come onto post and was just wondering where youre at? Goodluck!

Jake323

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Re: Journey to a better me
« Reply #84 on: May 31, 2017, 09:14:07 PM »
hey jake,

Just curious, what day are you on? I see your posts every day when I come onto post and was just wondering where youre at? Goodluck!

Hey man, I've been free from PMO 80 days after today. I honestly try not to get caught up on the numbers because I guess the real measure of success is how my life improves. I guess it's cool to reach milestones though haha. I'm only 10 days from the "90 day challenge" thing, if I can reach that, that will be cool I guess haha.

5/31/17

Work has been stressing me out lately, its a lot to deal with right now working full time at a job like the one I have. But, the show must go on.

Jake323

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Re: Journey to a better me
« Reply #85 on: June 01, 2017, 09:18:36 PM »
6/1/17

Ughhh kind of a boring day, my job has been stressful and boring. I also keep having obsessive thoughts about stupid things that don't even make sense. I've been stressing a lot about uncomfortable bodily sensations that I'm having such as my skin being dry and itchy, acne and pimples, and this coughing tic I feel the need to engage in when I feel a strong urge in the back if my throat. I keep getting a bloody/stuffy nose and stomach cramps/pains. Ahhhh, the stress and warm weather must be getting to me, I need a waterpark or a nice, cool hotel room and a week long trip away from work lol. I get to go to Denver for a few days in July though, so that'll be nice, lol.

IAddict

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Re: Journey to a better me
« Reply #86 on: June 02, 2017, 11:34:52 AM »
Hey Jake,

Keep going strong man! You are motivation for me right now to keep moving too. I personally keep track of my days and am on day 23, and have never made it passed day 30. Stay strong, my goal is to get where you are at right now.

- IAddict

Jake323

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Re: Journey to a better me
« Reply #87 on: June 02, 2017, 10:11:56 PM »
Hey Jake,

Keep going strong man! You are motivation for me right now to keep moving too. I personally keep track of my days and am on day 23, and have never made it passed day 30. Stay strong, my goal is to get where you are at right now.

- IAddict

Thanks man, good to know I'm inspiring others to live better lives. Best of luck to you.

6/2/17

A pretty good day, had some ups and downs, just like always. Work was really stressful at first, but I think I'm slowly starting to get a grip on some of the situations I have to deal with. Weight training session was ok, but still a lot of things to work on, mainly my technique/form.

Jake323

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Re: Journey to a better me
« Reply #88 on: June 03, 2017, 10:35:52 PM »
6/3/17

Ok, right after I posted yesterday, work turned into absolute chaos. It has been super stressful and anxiety-inducing. Ughhh, it's really starting to get tough, all I can do is my best though.

Jake323

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Re: Journey to a better me
« Reply #89 on: June 04, 2017, 10:36:51 PM »
6/4/17

Another stressful day at work, at least I get a couple days off, man this is challenging to take on right now.

Jake323

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Re: Journey to a better me
« Reply #90 on: June 05, 2017, 09:13:47 PM »
6/5/17

Today has been a really terrible day. I'm struggling to determine what the hell I want out of life and what the hell my values are. It's just a big question mark as to who I am and what I want to stand for.

Jake323

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Re: Journey to a better me
« Reply #91 on: June 06, 2017, 09:41:56 PM »
6/6/17

Another difficult day. I feel as if I have to change who I am in order to have success in life, to have relationships, and to be happier all around. Being shy and an introvert during adolescence and early adulthood is incredibly painful. I feel as if I'll never get to experience what most people do due to my anxiety, I can't get out of my head and stop obsessing over and over about things. Why can't I just have a normal freaking brain? Everything is so overstimulating and being around people and a ton of noise wears me the hell out. It sucks so bad. Disaster and failure seem to linger around every corner, things always feel like they're going to go wrong. I sit here in my head imagining every possible disastrous scenario that could happen. I thought I would like my new job, but it's honestly stressful and exhausting as all hell. It's always so loud and chaotic, things are unorganized and spontaneous. There aren't really any logical thinkers or ambitious people. I don't really like the people I work with either, they're loud mouths who have little sympathy and don't really care. I'm not really sure what I'm going to do here. I've thought about owning my own gym, but that takes years to accomplish. Maybe if I get started on the right track and learn how to run a business, learn about human anatomy, biology, and physiology than I could be a coach and train people as well? I don't know, I've always been really interested in sports/strength and conditioning and the human body, maybe that would be a good route to go in, look for a job at a gym or something? Idk, it's a mystery at this point....

Jake323

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Re: Journey to a better me
« Reply #92 on: June 07, 2017, 11:31:55 PM »
6/7/17

Had a pretty good day today except work, work is still stressful as hell. I'm contemplating finding a new job, this isn't really working out for me. I don't really like any of the people I work with either.

Jake323

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Re: Journey to a better me
« Reply #93 on: June 09, 2017, 12:17:23 AM »
6/8/17

Really long day, had to practically work for 13 hours today, but hey, at least it wasn't that chaotic. Money is always good too. Lol.

Jake323

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Re: Journey to a better me
« Reply #94 on: June 09, 2017, 09:16:53 PM »
6/9/17

Ughhh, I'm so freaking tired of work right now, I just wish I could be off for like 2 weeks and have a vacation. Pretty decent day though, the one thing I hate about the summer is that my nose and mouth are always dry. Uggghhhhh.

Jake323

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Re: Journey to a better me
« Reply #95 on: June 10, 2017, 11:10:01 PM »
6/10/17

Holy hell. Work almost gave me a heart attack today. Imagine having to handle five out of control, impulsive, juvenile delinquent boys all by yourself. Yeah, well that was me. Two of them started punching the shit out of each other, they were also in a cafeteria, so they were throwing chairs and screaming. I had to physically restrain one of them. I eventually had someone come to help me, but not before things really got out of control.I'm done with today, ughhh goodnight, lol.

Jake323

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Re: Journey to a better me
« Reply #96 on: June 11, 2017, 09:20:11 PM »
6/11/17

Had another difficult day at work. At least I don't have to go back until Wedneseday. I'll look for a new job until then. I'm simply not having a good time here, it's hard to make friends with coworkers, everybody is extremely rude and ignorant, and it's not organized very well. Kind of just a big, ridiculous mess. Nobody really wants to do anything either. I know I shouldn't make excuses, but these things certainly don't make my job any easier. I need to do a better job at a lot of things, but nobody really wants to be organized and strict. It's kind of just random and spontaneous.

Jake323

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Re: Journey to a better me
« Reply #97 on: June 12, 2017, 09:51:40 PM »
6/12/17

Had a pretty good day today, felt a little down later in the day, but I have a lot of things to look forward to. I'm getting online coaching for my weight training, so it should help me to get much stronger and should also help me to fix some of my problems with technique when the weight on the bar gets heavy. Really excited about getting this opportunity, should be very beneficial.

Jake323

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Re: Journey to a better me
« Reply #98 on: June 13, 2017, 09:11:39 PM »
6/13/17

Ughhhhh my ocd mind is going crazy thinking about all of the options I have for my future, where I can go, where I'll end up and it's giving me a damned headache. I really don't want to go back to work tomorrow either, but hey, at least I applied for a couple new jobs today. I feel kinda stuck as far as relationships with women goes. I'm really busy and online dating can lead back to PMO, so I'm not sure what to do because there's really nobody at work I can ask out, there's the gym I go to I guess, there's a few cute girls in there, I guess maybe they know a friend of theirs that will maybe work out? I've tried asking out a couple girls at the mall, but they both said they're not interested/seeing someone else. Not sure how to get a girl friend or girls in general, but fuck it I guess. Shouldn't expect that having a girlfriend will change my life or make me happy anyways.

Jake323

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Re: Journey to a better me
« Reply #99 on: June 14, 2017, 09:21:12 PM »
6/14/17

A pretty decent day overall, besides throwing up earlier in the day due to working out too hard lol.