Author Topic: Journey to a better me  (Read 43450 times)

Jake323

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Re: Journey to a better me
« Reply #100 on: June 15, 2017, 09:19:17 PM »
6/15/17

Pretty good day, I got a message from a place I'd really like to work, I will probably have a phone interview tomorrow, I'm really hoping I can land myself this job!! I'm crossing my fingers......

Jake323

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Re: Journey to a better me
« Reply #101 on: June 16, 2017, 09:11:17 PM »
6/16/17

Well, today started off pretty well and I got the new job!! Only thing is, I won't start until August :/
I was pretty anxious during the second half of the day too. Just worrying about a lot of things and felt a little insecure, but that's life I guess.

Jake323

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Re: Journey to a better me
« Reply #102 on: June 17, 2017, 11:13:44 PM »
6/17/17

Well today has been draining, I'm really tired lately and work was tough today. I'm really quite afraid that I might get injured or seriously hurt, it sucks to have to go to work with a ton of fear every day as well as getting yelled at and insulted.

Jake323

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Re: Journey to a better me
« Reply #103 on: June 18, 2017, 09:22:33 PM »
6/18/17

A pretty good day today, I am extremely tired, though. I could honestly sleep for 2 days straight. I've been so tired lately, plus I get a couple days off from work, time to relax, lol.

Jake323

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Re: Journey to a better me
« Reply #104 on: June 19, 2017, 10:17:12 PM »
6/19/17

Had a pretty good day today. Gym was good and I was chilling and relaxing at home for my day off, I really needed it, lol.

Jake323

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Re: Journey to a better me
« Reply #105 on: June 20, 2017, 09:02:28 PM »
6/20/17

Well damn today has been kinda tough for me, I'm just at a point where I don't really know what to believe, there's so much shit out there that people try to sell to you, and I just don't really know what my values are or what I truly want, kind of facing an existential crisis and it hasn't been a very fun experience.

Jake323

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Re: Journey to a better me
« Reply #106 on: June 21, 2017, 09:29:14 PM »
6/21/17

I've felt absolutely terrible today. I feel burned out and exhausted, as well as really stressed for some reason. The place I want to work called me back and continued a phone interview with me. I was a nervous wreck and felt like I did pretty bad for the most part, but I guess I somehow redeemed myself and they want me to come in for an in person interview on Monday. They called me at the worst possible time, while I was busy at my other job and my phone was almost dead, so I was trying like he'll to multitask between the two situations and was stressed and nervous on top of that. I've been such a basket case lately, people in general just stress me the hell out and make me nervous as hell. I guess I've been doing a lot this week too because I've been walking up to random girls that are attractive to me and asking them out, so that can cause a lot of anxiety because I never thought it could be as simple or as easy as that, but I guess it is, it's just really hard and scary because I've lived a good part of my adolescence and young adult life in fear.

Spiritseeker

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Re: Journey to a better me
« Reply #107 on: June 22, 2017, 12:31:31 AM »
Hello, Jake323. I must say I read a big part of your journal and can testify you seem to have had a tremendous success at your reboot so far. You're probably reaching 90 days this week and that would be a great achievement for me if I got there as well. No matter what happens and what you feel, keep working. I'm also in a process of getting a new job after poor decisions I made in the past few months and I know how stressful this kind of situation is. During interviews, I would try to be true and sincere about my intentions and the good work I could bring for the company. That may calm you down and make things sound natural. Good luck, mate!
Ad altiora natus sum.

Jake323

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Re: Journey to a better me
« Reply #108 on: June 22, 2017, 09:03:59 PM »
Hello, Jake323. I must say I read a big part of your journal and can testify you seem to have had a tremendous success at your reboot so far. You're probably reaching 90 days this week and that would be a great achievement for me if I got there as well. No matter what happens and what you feel, keep working. I'm also in a process of getting a new job after poor decisions I made in the past few months and I know how stressful this kind of situation is. During interviews, I would try to be true and sincere about my intentions and the good work I could bring for the company. That may calm you down and make things sound natural. Good luck, mate!

Thanks, brother. It's been definitely tough for sure but worth it in so many ways. Good luck to you as well and thanks for the advice!

6/22/17

I didn't sleep very well last night and had to work for 14 hours today, sooooo yeah, I'm pretty damned tired. Hopefully I'll be able to sleep tonight, which I think I'll be able to if I have good sleep hygiene and stuff lol.

Jake323

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Re: Journey to a better me
« Reply #109 on: June 23, 2017, 09:04:29 PM »
6/23/17

Got some better sleep last night, feeling better today. Just another ordinary day for me.

Jake323

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Re: Journey to a better me
« Reply #110 on: June 24, 2017, 09:25:20 PM »
6/24/17

An alright day, pretty ordinary again.

Jake323

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Re: Journey to a better me
« Reply #111 on: June 25, 2017, 09:36:13 PM »
6/25/17

Today has been a really good day, work was pretty easy and I got to go out to dinner with a friend of mine from the gym I go to, now I get a couple days off to just relax.

Jake323

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Re: Journey to a better me
« Reply #112 on: June 26, 2017, 10:00:55 PM »
6/26/17

Had a great day today, killed it at my job interview and had a good gym session
 Now I have to go in tomorrow for a final job interview, I'm hoping I can do well so I get this job!!!

Jake323

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Re: Journey to a better me
« Reply #113 on: June 27, 2017, 11:20:20 PM »
6/27/17

Yess!! I got the job!!! I get a bunch of benefits and perks that start day one, so excited to start in about a month. Also hung out with some friends and had a great time, awesome day today.

Spiritseeker

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Re: Journey to a better me
« Reply #114 on: June 27, 2017, 11:49:03 PM »
6/27/17

Yess!! I got the job!!! I get a bunch of benefits and perks that start day one, so excited to start in about a month. Also hung out with some friends and had a great time, awesome day today.

Congratulations, Jake323. As far as I can remember, getting this new job would be a real achievement for you. Everything I can wish you now is EVEN MORE SUCCESS. Go ahead!
Ad altiora natus sum.

Jake323

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Re: Journey to a better me
« Reply #115 on: June 28, 2017, 09:11:50 PM »
6/27/17

Yess!! I got the job!!! I get a bunch of benefits and perks that start day one, so excited to start in about a month. Also hung out with some friends and had a great time, awesome day today.

Congratulations, Jake323. As far as I can remember, getting this new job would be a real achievement for you. Everything I can wish you now is EVEN MORE SUCCESS. Go ahead!

Thank you very much good sir!

6/28/17

Had an alright day today. Pretty ordinary day nothing much really happened.

Jake323

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Re: Journey to a better me
« Reply #116 on: June 29, 2017, 09:23:02 PM »
6/29/17

I was really tired today. It took me a while to wake up and get my day going, but I was able to do that once I started to move a little bit.

Jake323

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Re: Journey to a better me
« Reply #117 on: June 30, 2017, 09:10:11 PM »
6/30/17

Had a pretty decent day today, but my sleep has sucked the past couple nights, oh well. I guess it just happens sometimes when you're stressed.

Jake323

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Re: Journey to a better me
« Reply #118 on: July 01, 2017, 09:03:10 PM »
7/1/17

Today has been tough. The negative thoughts and anxiety has been tough to accept. As well as the storyline/content of my negative thoughts, it feels very real. Just a lot of uncertainty running through my mind about my life, it hasn't been the most pleasant thing in the world.

Jake323

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Re: Journey to a better me
« Reply #119 on: July 02, 2017, 09:00:32 PM »
7/2/17

I've been in my head a lot today, the content in my mind seems very important, but I'm trying to just ignore it.

Jake323

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Re: Journey to a better me
« Reply #120 on: July 03, 2017, 10:32:02 PM »
7/3/17

Started out as a pretty bad day, but got better. I asked out this girl in my gym for coffee, apparently she was only in town for a couple days but oh well, it was worth a shot. Lifting however, has been hard, I have been feeling a lot of random aches and pains. It's not the most painful thing in the world, but it's just an annoying, nagging pain.

Jake323

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Re: Journey to a better me
« Reply #121 on: July 04, 2017, 08:58:12 PM »
7/4/17

Had an ok 4th of July I guess. Went out to dinner with some friends and had a good laugh. I've been really worried about stupid shit again, however.

Jake323

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Re: Journey to a better me
« Reply #122 on: July 05, 2017, 10:06:02 PM »
7/5/17

Life has been tough lately. I'm having a lot of feelings of shame and guilt. Being vulnerable with others is extremely difficult because I've interacted with others on such a shallow level for most of my adolescence and young adulthood. My motivation hasn't been the same the past few days. I've been feeling a lot of fear and anger as well.

Jake323

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Re: Journey to a better me
« Reply #123 on: July 06, 2017, 09:11:03 PM »
7/6/17

Had an alright day. Kinda boring, but most days are boring and ordinary.

Jake323

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Re: Journey to a better me
« Reply #124 on: July 07, 2017, 11:54:19 PM »
7/7/17

Had kind of a shitty day today, felt pretty depressed and lonely. Went out with some friends and drank a little too much, but hey I guess that's life, there's shitty days and good days.