I did have to wonder about the advice to not stop until one had finished reading the book, otherwise the method won't work. I guess that means I'm doomed, since I had already stopped at the end of October. The constant claims that the addiction has no pleasure are based on a misunderstanding of neurochemistry and neuroanatomy. It's flat-out wrong to claim that there is no pleasure in an addiction. There is a great deal of pleasure in it. What is not in an addiction are satisfaction or happiness.This can clear up some of the simple neuroscientific mistakes in that book:https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3008353/The problem is that the author does not wish to accept (or perhaps cannot accept) the well-known and well-established fact that "pleasure" is not automatically "good". Something can give a great deal of momentary pleasure and still be very unpleasant in the long run.
i don´t know; i think that willpower is and always will be the key, because otherwise any other method will became just like a crutch, in other words: willpower is the only thing that can help us walk again because like the name implies it comes from our resolve to get cured; any other method will make us dependent on it; we will be trading one addiction for an other!! i might be wrong but i just don´t believe in easy ways!!!!
penitent i´m speaking for myself and myself only!! to me the problem is not porn itself!! after all we are men; to think about sex, to have fantasies about sex, to want to watch sex is a natural thing; the problem is how we use those resources and even if willpower turns this into some "moralistic" thing the "forbidden fix" like you said; since i´m now aware of it the chances of getting me by surprise are minimum; many guys here if not all of them when first started to watch porn didn´t have the slightest idea that could cause ED but now we know so that is when willpower comes!! like: "that shit is not good for me so why would i keep doing that? i´m gonna get far away from that shit!!" so what is wrong about that? i´m a great enthusiastic of the philosophy that if we have a weakness you have to face it and face it until it can no longer harm you any more face your fear in the eye!!! like i said dirty thoughts are part of who we are is part of nature we just need to learn how to deal each of us in our own way!!!
I NEVER envied men who were still porn addicts, not for an instant. Why would I? That makes no sense at all. I can't see HOW I could have ever envied such people. The thought NEVER entered my head for a moment, not even before I read the little "magic book". How could there be any envy? And I had ALREADY STOPPED before finding the book, but the book said to NOT STOP before reading the entire book. Therefore, I MUST BE DOOMED, right? The book suffers from some really atrocious writing that badly obscures the good points it makes.As for feeling "elated"--I don't do elated. I do satisfied. I do accomplishment. I do "I am so chilling." But I don't do "elated", just like I do NOT hug random people on the street. It's not the way I'm wired. I haven't done elated even as a child. It's not my way to express myself. Whether I feel any of those regarding pornography addiction, I'd say that I'm more watchful than anything. Guard the door, because even when clean, I know that the old pathways still have a relic, and that relic is still fairly fresh. Long-term addiction can produce long-term brain alterations, so it behooves me to maintain relaxed vigilance. Now, I don't feel deprived, I don't miss it. I don't long for it. I also couldn't quite figure out WHAT the method in the book was--the book was far too garbled and full of hyperbole for its own sake.Now, I do not feel pity for the folks still in the throes of the active addiction. I don't do pity. I'll exercise compassion and offer advice, but I don't do pity. Pity is demeaning. As for your hair-splitting about "illusion of pleasure", that's cult leader language, not borne out by real neuroscience. I do know enough about the neuroscience of pleasure, hedonics, and eudaimonia to know that there is quite a bit of pleasure in addictions, and no amount of word diddling will change that. What is missing from addiction are satisfaction and happiness. That is why the next hit keeps being taken--the addict seeks eudaimonia, happiness, satisfaction, and it never occurs, so there's another hit once the wave of pleasure fades. Your consideration of brain chemistry is extremely rudimentary and superficial. You are too heavily chained to your irrational fear of admitting neurological truths about addiction to actually use up-to-date neuroscience.
I finished reading the book. In fact, I found it quite compelling reading.Yes, it could be tidied up somewhat but I found the message quite interesting and a different approach.Particularly I liked the treatment of looking at the "Willpower Method" and this connected a lot for me and the guys I know. Essentially, it is a deprivation viewpoint which makes it unsustainable and unstable.The approach here encourages turning around how you look at your life. To be thankful for what you have, develop and more balanced view of the ups and downs, realise you can cope with anything and enjoy the pmo free life you now have. It is a message of positivity rather than reluctance. That the greatest reward and gift for you is your own freedom and life back. That is huge. There is so much to gain and nothing really to lose.I find it pretty ironic that most of the guys here would willingly grant freedom from this addiction to any of the other guys here. That we witness a lot of distress and suffering from others that is horrible. Yet we would not be kind enough to grant that freedom to ourselves. The great irony being that you cannot control others, only yourself. This is how distorted my mind had become.I think it does well to look at and challenge the cognitive distortions that go on in the mind of an addict. There are many subconscious feelings and thoughts of how things should work that aren't true. I had several points of connection.The point regarding pleasure is interesting. But really I don't think it's actually "pleasure" - instead porn was a "thrill" or a buzz. And that is very different from satisfaction and fulfilment. So when somebody says porn is pleasurable, I think now that is a distortion to avoid seeing the whole picture. It's a broken lonely coping mechanism, very likely done in secret, alone with a whole host of mental and physical drawbacks to distract you from life. It's not pleasurable, it's sad and unhappy. At best, it's a cheap thrill and escapism. Give that guy a hug and your heart, he needs it abd is hurting - and keep life moving forward.
Hi all. Here is a "hackbook" of a Method that does NOT ask you to use 'Willpower' (which I think is ineffective). It is based on a very successful method and I am confident you will see results. Cheers. https://sites.google.com/site/hackbookeasypeasy/home
Could I read your journal anywhere? Im curious did you start out trying 'will power'?ThxPS: I think whats needed is a combination. You have to know you don't want to watch porn. But you still have to break the "in-the-moment-pleasurable" habits, which might at times requires will power by e.g. choosing to come to this forum instead of watching p when you have a craving.