Author Topic: FlyPhoenix Journal  (Read 47505 times)

jixu

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Re: FlyPhoenix Journal
« Reply #350 on: March 18, 2019, 09:09:30 AM »
I lifted you up in prayer this morning friend.  Keep up the fight, a wife and child are worth it.  Remember, where "you are" in the journey is important, but so is direction, i.e, are we moving forward.  Go forward today-let tomorrow worry about itself.  Stay with this forum friend.   

FlyPhoenix

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Re: FlyPhoenix Journal
« Reply #351 on: April 02, 2019, 02:16:30 AM »
I lifted you up in prayer this morning friend.  Keep up the fight, a wife and child are worth it.  Remember, where "you are" in the journey is important, but so is direction, i.e, are we moving forward.  Go forward today-let tomorrow worry about itself.  Stay with this forum friend.   

Thank you so much jixu, you don't know how much that means to me.

I am taking steps back and preparing myself to pick up doing my steps again, this time thoroughly for my P addiction. I admit that I have a lot of resistance to doing so because I know how taxing it is emotionally. It is a huge time investment and there is the fear that it might not work at all.

Also, I am badly addicted to the Internet and social media, and I am not sure how willing I am to let go of it.

The combination of my personal family crisis and the addiction to P and Internet has left me feeling very anxious throughout and I feel like just giving up.

I am praying for strength today. Amen.
Last PMO - 12 June 2019 18h00

FlyPhoenix Journal

jixu

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Re: FlyPhoenix Journal
« Reply #352 on: April 10, 2019, 06:57:57 AM »
Check back in friend, rain or shine.  Keep up the fight-you know it is worth it.  Lifted you up again this morning.  You are not alone in the struggle.

FlyPhoenix

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Re: FlyPhoenix Journal
« Reply #353 on: May 06, 2019, 02:54:50 AM »
Hi all,
@juixu thanks for the prayers they mean a lot.

Today I am grateful for second chances, for the sun, for the clean air. Although I live in a (relatively) large city, we are blessed with lots of trees where I stay. So, while there is a freeway nearby, the air is bearable. Not as good as in the rural sections of our country, but definitely better than a lot of other places.

I am grateful for my mother, father, my wife, my daughter, son, nephew, and my whole extended family. They really mean a lot to me, as they are there for me in difficult times.

I have been struggling with school work, I feel like I might have bit off more than I could chew this time, praying for strength and focus. I feel guilty that I haven't put as much work as I should have, and I spend a good amount of money of registration and tuition fees, which I could have used to benefit my family or invested elsewhere.

I can't continue to blame my wife for "not supporting" my studies, because I need to first be the one who supports my studies before I can expected someone else to support them. Same with my recovery and every other area of my development.

Hoping you are all good, will make a bigger effort to check in daily.

Take care all, odaat..
Fly
Last PMO - 12 June 2019 18h00

FlyPhoenix Journal

FlyPhoenix

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Re: FlyPhoenix Journal
« Reply #354 on: June 13, 2019, 03:51:18 AM »
Things came to a head last night. My wife confronted me about my porn use, which was a good thing because we had a heart-to-heart about a lot of things. Feeling hopeful about life, need to focus on my recovery and my mental health. Hope you guys are great, keep pushing, there is light at the end of the tunnel.
Last PMO - 12 June 2019 18h00

FlyPhoenix Journal

FlyPhoenix

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Re: FlyPhoenix Journal
« Reply #355 on: July 10, 2019, 03:37:19 AM »
Focusing on meetings, writing in my journal and speaking to my sponsor. Working out so far, thankful to God for each day.
Last PMO - 12 June 2019 18h00

FlyPhoenix Journal

FlyPhoenix

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Re: FlyPhoenix Journal
« Reply #356 on: October 01, 2019, 04:36:41 AM »
Still clean, been tested by life's circumstances, but by the grace of my  higher power, I am clean.

Hope everyone is well on this forum and in the real world. I have seen a lot of cases in the media of people harming and abusing others, a lot of it sexually motivated. I think the fact that this problem is so hidden and still very taboo to talk about, keeps men from getting the help they need and they end up doing things that harm others, land them in jail or worse.

Sending a prayer of healing out into the world, for myself and for good people who deserve a better life, especially children.
Last PMO - 12 June 2019 18h00

FlyPhoenix Journal

Loving_Mary

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Re: FlyPhoenix Journal
« Reply #357 on: October 20, 2019, 11:48:22 AM »
Still clean, been tested by life's circumstances, but by the grace of my  higher power, I am clean.

Hope everyone is well on this forum and in the real world. I have seen a lot of cases in the media of people harming and abusing others, a lot of it sexually motivated. I think the fact that this problem is so hidden and still very taboo to talk about, keeps men from getting the help they need and they end up doing things that harm others, land them in jail or worse.

Sending a prayer of healing out into the world, for myself and for good people who deserve a better life, especially children.

Hi Fly long time no talk.

Congratulations for being clean.

Just wanted to say that you're still in my prayers.

Peace :)
Peace :)