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Messages - StartingOffNew

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Women / Re: What if I've given up dating...
« on: April 17, 2017, 09:04:18 PM »
I guess I'll just post here to be different and say, I have the same concern.  Less so now since I'm currently in a relationship, but this is only my second relationship and when I found out about my ed during my first and then broke up...I asked myself, what's it matter?  I'll probably never find a girl I want to be with anyway. 

Porn is tough to give up because it is fun.  I think you need a reason to give up, but the drawback is, once you have that reason, it maybe tough to break the habit. 

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Ages 20-29 / Re: Here is the start of something new
« on: April 17, 2017, 08:57:58 PM »
Ok, I'm back! 

I did tell the girl about the ED and why I think I have it.  It went great, she's totally supportive about it.

However, in a good turn of events, it turns out that I can get hard enough to have sex with her, though I can't get completely hard.  And I don't orgasm with her. But I can have sex with her and it's amazing! 

Bad news is I've been relapsing like crazy.  I need to get back on the wagon.  I guess I'll call tomorrow Day 1, back to the drawing board :(

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Ages 20-29 / Re: Here is the start of something new
« on: March 19, 2017, 11:39:09 AM »
Relapsed again, hurrrah.  Not gonna go into details. 
I guess day one will start tomorrow.  lol.

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Ages 20-29 / Re: Here is the start of something new
« on: March 18, 2017, 11:38:58 PM »
So early in the morning of day 7.  Having trouble sleeping because I'm angry at the girl I'm dating.  It's making me want to relapse too.  On the other hand, I know that I really don't want to relapse, independent of the girl thing.   Just angry and want to say something to her, but she's sleeping right now.  On the other hand, I don't want to seem like I'm nitpicking out of the blue, so I'm thinking I'm going to wait until she does the thing that annoys me again and then I'll bother her about it. 

5
Thanks for your responses, that's helpful.  Just wondering what I should expect from the doctor's visit. 

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Ages 20-29 / Re: Here is the start of something new
« on: March 14, 2017, 10:27:20 PM »
End of the day.  I've got this weird dull ache in the head of my penis.  Not sure if it's related to reboot or masturbation.

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Women / Re: Its a process...I guess.
« on: March 14, 2017, 10:40:42 AM »
I think it's great that your son is asking you questions.  I never had that kind of relationship with either of my parents.  I remember once my dad caught me masturbating and he just slammed the door and muttered "sick guy."  Even if they were cool about it, I would have never felt comfortable talking to them about it, even if they broached the subject themselves in a rational way. 

I guess just when you're talking to them, let them know that they need to be safe and that their sexual urges are normal.  If porn comes up, let them know that doing it too much can negatively affect them.  I don't think you should outright tell them it's not allowed, because a)That will make him feel guilty when he does eventually give into his urges, and trust me, he most likely see it at some point and b) I honestly think some experience with masturbation is healthy.  Do it regularly, but not too often, and not to things that are too extreme. 

'Course, an actual conversation is bound to be messier and more complicated than that, so keep your head on a swivel and just try to be honest.  But I think it's also ok if you opted not to answer some questions if they're not in your comfort zone, or just aren't sure how to answer.


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Ages 20-29 / Re: Here is the start of something new
« on: March 14, 2017, 10:25:24 AM »
Relapsed Sunday before my date.  Didn't orgasm but masturbated to erotica a little. 

So this is day two.


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Ages 20-29 / Re: Here is the start of something new
« on: March 11, 2017, 12:31:57 PM »
I was literally about to relapse...until I had a connection issue and was prevented from doing so.

But I was fantasizing about erotica leading up to that.  It feels like a relapse even though it wasn't. 

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Ages 20-29 / Re: Here is the start of something new
« on: March 11, 2017, 09:08:20 AM »
day 12, had another very strong urge. 

The problem is, I actually miss it.  I miss doing the whole PMO thing.  It's something I used to look forward to after a long day.  That's what's making it tough. 

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Ages 20-29 / Re: Here is the start of something new
« on: March 10, 2017, 08:01:17 AM »
Day 11 strongest urgenive had to read erotica since i started.  I wont do it but my mind was trying to tell me that oncenwpuld be fine,  maybe even once in a whike.  I cant though. Because im not recovered yet

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Ages 20-29 / Re: Here is the start of something new
« on: March 09, 2017, 07:14:56 AM »
Morning of day ten.  I really want to masturbate and bust a nut.  Had a really hot night last night with the girl I'm dating, making out pretty passionately.  Want more, so badly. 

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Ages 20-29 / Re: Here is the start of something new
« on: March 08, 2017, 12:34:10 PM »
Middle of day 9.  Mostly just posting to keep up the count.  I feel like i actually sleep better the past few days.  Not sure if its my body recovering from being sick or if my abstinence has anything to do with it.

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Ages 20-29 / Re: Here is the start of something new
« on: March 07, 2017, 06:37:57 PM »
day 8. 

I have a strong hankering for it right now.  I just feel like I need it to feel like myself.  I feel off, tired, stressed, and frustrated that I still have to wait another 24 hours before I see the girl I'm dating again. 

15
Im defining my rebiot in terms of not masturbating at all.  My question isn't really whether or not it counts as a relapse, but assumes that it IS a relapse and asks whats best for recovery time.  Hope that makes sense, typing with my thumbs right now.

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Ages 20-29 / Re: Here is the start of something new
« on: March 06, 2017, 07:57:20 AM »
Day 7.

Honestly dont notice much progress.  But im not relapsing, which is nice.

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Ages 20-29 / Re: Here is the start of something new
« on: March 05, 2017, 10:53:42 AM »
I wonder if it counts if you watch porn in your sleep lol. 

Have an urge to look at some porn but I won't.  I think the trigger is mostly boredom.  I've been home for about four days straight now because I'm sick.  I'll go to the gym today, hopefully that will make me feel better. 

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Ages 20-29 / Re: Here is the start of something new
« on: March 05, 2017, 12:12:46 AM »
Close of day six.

It's weird, I was getting more semi erections in three days in the first part of this journal than I have been in almost a week now. 

Kind did some heavy flirting with the girl, it got sort of sexual, not sure if that's was a no no, but I feel like since she's a real girl it's ok. 

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Ages 20-29 / Re: Here is the start of something new
« on: March 04, 2017, 07:15:53 AM »
Good news: I changed my mind again and ended up doing the text thing.  She responded as well as I could have ever hoped for: totally positively.  It was amazing  ;D

Morning of day six, have a bad cough but overall I'm feeling much better.  Want to PMO but I know I won't right now. 

I kind of had a dream, I think?  Basically where I was masturbating.  I'm not sure if it was a dream or if I was actually touching myself and half asleep.  I didn't have ejaculate in my pants though, so whatever it was, I didn't finish.

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Ages 20-29 / Re: Here is the start of something new
« on: March 03, 2017, 05:40:16 PM »
Not going to do the text thing, I want to tell her in person.  But I'm sick so no date for now. 

Also have a strong urge to check out porn and masturbate.  I have hardly been aroused at all these five days.  It makes me want to get myself aroused.  To do it and satisfy myself. 

21
Women / Re: Any Other Women Here Who Struggle With Erotica?
« on: March 03, 2017, 11:27:49 AM »
I'm a guy, am also big on erotica/text-based porn games.  Honestly I always found erotica way more stimulating than videos or pics. 
 
To add on to what others have said, I wonder if erotica isn't the worse kind of porn in regards to how it effects us, because literature messes with our imagination more directly than just visual and audio stimuli can.  Videos tend to be repetitive and and simple.  It's also immediate, so if something disgusts us about a video we tend to quickly click off of it.  Words, however, are seemingly more innocuous, so it leads us gradually slip more and more into more extreme fantasies without offending us as much as videos, and therefore probably lead to increased insensitivity.

I'm on day five right now, and I'm not even thinking about the fantasies or stories I've read.  I know they'll arouse me and I want to only be aroused by the real thing. 

That's just a thought. 

22
To be honest, the prospect scares me a little.  What sorts of questions did your doctor ask?  Did they run any tests?  Was it awkward?  I'm just wondering what I should expect if I talk to my physician about this.

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Ages 20-29 / Re: Here is the start of something new
« on: March 03, 2017, 09:09:25 AM »
Morning of day 5.  I feel paranoid that doing anything will be a trigger.
 Laying on the mattress in the room upstairs. Having second thoughts about the text.

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Ages 20-29 / Re: Here is the start of something new
« on: March 03, 2017, 12:57:14 AM »
I suddenly feel extremely guilty for not telling her yet.  I want to tezt her but i know she's asleep now.  And i dont want to stress her at work.  I'll have to wait for tomorrow evening.  Its going to be hanging over my head until then.

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Ages 20-29 / Re: Here is the start of something new
« on: March 02, 2017, 11:51:52 PM »
Feeling physically worse and depressed.  Think i have might have strep.  Ive got chikls as i type this. 

Having unwarranted negative thoughts anout my relationship due to depression

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