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Topics - PornNevermore

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Porn Addiction / It's all about perspective
« on: March 12, 2015, 05:30:25 PM »
Before I decided to quit porn, I had normalized it. By normalize, I mean that I convinced myself that porn was real- real emotions, real orgasms, real pleasure.

Then I began putting things in perspective.

Porn is one of the most disingenuous things man has ever created. The people you are watching on your computer screen are having sex for money. Most of them aren't enjoying it; the "pleasure" you see in their faces, the moaning, and the body spasms are all fake. They are actors. There is no love or relationship to what they are doing. Stop convincing yourself that it is real or even remotely genuine.

Pornography is like being in a relationship with a prostitute. She's convinced you that she loves you, but the sex you have isn't genuine. She's just using you for your money. But it isn't money that porn steals away from you. No, it is much worse. Porn steals away every ounce of emotion in your mind. It sucks you dry of relationships and motivation. It eats away your happiness. If you don't decide to change, it leaves you beaten and bruised on the side of the road and then you ask yourself

"Why?"

Was it worth it? Those ten second feelings of ecstasy? The brief moment of relief which quickly turns to shame and guilt, pressing you down into an abyss of depression and anger?

It isn't worth it guys. Put porn in perspective. It's nothing but a bully.

2
"Our greatest weakness lies in giving up. The most certain way to succeed is always to try just one more time."

And so I urge you, keep going.

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Porn Addiction / Understand that you aren't alone
« on: March 07, 2015, 10:47:09 PM »
This is something that has been on my heart lately. Even with a fantastic community like Reboot Nation, I think a lot of us get lost in a place of mental isolation; stranded in a place which wants us to believe that we are attempting to break this addiction on our own. That idea couldn't be further from the truth. This week, when you face temptation, understand that there are HUNDREDS of people rooting for you- myself included. You aren't going at this alone. You have a whole army of individuals who've got your back and want to see you succeed.

If you are reading this right now, just keep going. Don't let porn whisper in your ear that "you're all alone." It's just a big fat lie; one which a lot of us seem to fall for. Just ignore it, or even better yet, give it a nice punch in the nose and tell it

"No. I'm not alone."

Because that is the truth. 

4
In my experience, I've found that simply occupying my mind with something else for 10-15 minutes works wonders. Just wanted to know what others think!

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Porn Addiction / Finding your meaning and seeking your passions
« on: February 28, 2015, 07:55:49 PM »
I've always struggled with finding definite meaning in my life, but since participating in NoFap, I've actually come to find it isn't as hard as I thought. Once I truly discovered who I am and what my passions are, It became so much easier to abstain from pornography. It helped me so much that I actually wrote an entire chapter about it in my book and I want to share it with you guys:


I’ve wrestled with this idea for years without winning a single fight. Purpose? What is my purpose? It’s a universal question that all people ask themselves at one point in their life or another. Sadly, many grope endlessly in the darkness, dying before they find an answer. Death; not in the sense that their heart stops beating, but in the sense that they stop trying. They let the monotony of life consume them, their nine to five work schedule define them, let their television set control them. Why? Because it’s easier to resign yourself from those questions than to answer them. It’s easier to turn in a blank test rather than digging in your mind for the answer. Had I not realized how destructive my pornography addiction was, I would have eventually given up as well. I would have turned in the test with absolutely none of the answers filled in; however, I’ve come to realize something this week. The answer sheet has been in my pocket the whole time. We grope in the darkness, all the while failing to realize that the flashlight is right under our feet. It isn’t that hard to find meaning in your life. Don’t let yourself think that it’s impossible. That is a lie which pornography wants you to believe so it can remain as a festering parasite deep within your soul. Trust me. If I, nothing more than a wan-dering college student which has not only hit rock bottom, but began digging into the sediment, can find purpose, then so can you.

It begins with finding your passions in life. Find what you love, find what piques your interest, and use it to begin molding yourself. Maybe you can take something you’ve been using as an oc-cupant and turn it into a hobby. As I said before, writing this book initially helped me curb my sexual appetite, but it’s beginning to turn into a passion of mine. The more I write, the fuller I am. As my fingers glide across the keyboard, the thought of masturbating to pornography becomes the absolute last thing on my mind. Find your niche in life and make it your initial meaning, whether that be painting, fishing, or playing a musical instrument. Just make sure it is something that is selfless and of benefit to you.

Taking up a hobby that is of genuine interest is important because it’s the initial step of defining yourself. Right now you and I are dried out pieces of clay because we’ve removed the moisture of pornography. Your passion is not only going to replace that moisture with clean water, but it’s also going to be the first tool which helps shape you. As you jog down the golden path of success you will continually pick up tools along the way, but it’s your passion that will remain with you always. Focus on that passion. Let it become the unstoppable force that disintegrates the void, shrinking it into nothing.

Let me remind you that your passion should not become mindless work. Yes, work hard to develop it, but don’t let it consume your life, making you bored, miserable, and tired. That is not the end goal, and if you seem to be drifting away from that, then by all means take a step back and reevaluate yourself. Don’t burn yourself out.

“But there’s nothing in life that interests me. I don’t think I can find my passion.” Again, that is the void talking. Cover your ears and ignore it. Start by attempting new things. You never know if you like something until you try it.

Also, you need to start breaking the monotony of your daily routine. Instead of coming home from your job and immediately hopping on the computer, choose to read a book or work on a project instead. Anything that adds a flicker of difference in your life will help break the monotony. Just make sure you don’t fall back into another boring routine.

Another thing that may help you is making sure to use your time productively. I previously mentioned that one of the worst things to do when breaking your addiction is to waste time on the internet. Idleness in general is enough to fuel the void and spark a flame for sexual thoughts. Stay productive because productivity not only prevents those things, but it can also yield meaning in the process. Try. That is the word which you must repeat over and over in your head. You won’t reach the finish line if you refuse to put your shoes on.

Once you’ve adopted your passion, meaning will follow suit. A lack of pornography coupled with genuine interest is enough to begin molding you into the person you desire to be.


Hope this helps guys!

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Just got the first copy in the mail and I'm super excited! Now I can share my work with people who don't have an E-reader.

You can find it here if you are interested: http://www.amazon.com/Pornography-Addiction-Destroying-Habit-Breaking/dp/1508429790/ref=tmm_pap_title_0?ie=UTF8&qid=1424916327&sr=8-3

Thanks guys! You've given me a lot of support and good feedback so far!

-Jay

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Important Update: Now available on Amazon for 1.99 instead of 4.99. Paperback edition is now 8.99 instead of 11.99. 

(Note: If for any reason you can't afford to buy the kindle or paperback versions, please send me a message at the E-mail provided below and I will send you a PDF of the book free-of-charge.)

I just turned 20 last September. Ten years. That's how long my addiction lasted. A whole decade of my life wasted and destroyed. After another failed attempt at quitting I decided enough was enough. I was done with being so weak and dependent on something that was destroying me from the inside out.

I made that decision one month ago and ever since then, I've been porn and masturbation-free. Porn has lied to me like a cheating wife and there is no way in hell I'm going back. We're divorced. It's over.

During that one month period I kept a journal outlining my daily progress. That journal quickly evolved into a book which I packed full of advice and resources to help others break the chains of their addiction. I don't want people going through the same thing I've gone through. If I can help even a single person get back on their feet and start LIVING, I'll be able to die happy knowing porn lost and WE won.

I finished this book two days ago and I want to make it available to the members of Reboot Nation. This is my journal. This is my story. You can find it here if you are interested: http://amzn.to/1DEE5BF

If you are struggling with pornography addiction, don't wait another day to start changing your habits. Don't tell yourself "one more video and then i'm done" or "I'll stop watching porn next week." There is no next week, you know why? Because that week turns into a month, which turns into a year, which turns into a whole life spiraling down the drain. Promise yourself you will try your best. Make the change. Start living.

            Thanks for your time. I hope my book/story helps
                                                                                   -Jay

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Ages 20-29 / 20 Years Old. Wrote a Book for You Guys.
« on: February 14, 2015, 07:01:10 AM »
I just turned 20 last September. Ten years. That's how long my addiction lasted. A whole decade of my life wasted and destroyed. After another failed attempt at quitting I decided enough was enough. I was done with being so weak and dependent on something that was destroying me from the inside out.

I made that decision one month ago and ever since then, I've been porn and masturbation-free. Porn has lied to me like a cheating wife and there is no way in hell I'm going back. We're divorced. It's over.

During that one month period I kept a journal outlining my daily progress. That journal quickly evolved into a book which I packed full of advice and resources to help others break the chains of their addiction. I don't want people going through the same thing I've gone through. If I can help even a single person get back on their feet and start LIVING, I'll be able to die happy knowing porn lost and WE won.

I finished this book two days ago and I want to make it free for the members of Reboot Nation. This is my journal. This is my story. You can find it here if you are interested: http://tinyurl.com/nqkx9bt

If you are struggling with pornography addiction, don't wait another day to start changing your habits. Don't tell yourself "one more video and then i'm done" or "I'll stop watching porn next week." There is no next week, you know why? Because that week turns into a month, which turns into a year, which turns into a whole life spiraling down the drain. Promise yourself you will try your best. Make the change. Start living.

            Thanks for your time. I hope my book/story helps
                                                                                   -Jay 

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