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Topics - Anonymous Dude

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Teens / My struggle of quitting PMO
« on: January 25, 2015, 12:10:14 PM »
Hi readers! I just registered to this site because I felt like I needed some support/help/advice. Firstly I would like to tell my story so everyone who takes the time and effort to read and maybe answer to my post can have something to work with. So here I go...

I'm a 19-year old guy and on 17th of January 2015 I decided it was time to quit PMO. I had been PMOing actively for about 7-8 years. I first saw P when I was 8 or 9 years old because I had a friend who was 4 years older than me. At that time porn wasn't really something I craved but something that was "nice" to watch from time to time when I was visiting my friend. Back then watching porn didn't trigger any urges to masturbate because I didn't know anything about masturbation. After a few years we got high speed internet at my home and that was the time I really started watching P. That was also the time that I discovered masturbation. At first I didn't connect masturbation and P together but after a while that changed. Even then it wasn't that hard to not PMO. I would have seasons when I didn't PMO at all or just very little and some seasons when I PMO'd a few times in a week but not daily. During the years of my puberty the amount of porn I consumed began to grow slowly. I didn't really move into weirder or shocking material until I was about 16 or 17 years old. I still think that I never watched the REALLY shocking material but the material I started to watch at that age was definitely something that I would not have been watching a few years back (I don't want to really get into details because I don't want anyone to get cravings from reading this). Soon I noticed that the new more shocking material made me a lot more aroused than the "normal" P I had been watching for years. I didn't know the cause of this so I just kept going and watched these sorts of things until I decided to quit porn. But even though I started to watch more shocking P, I still liked to watch "normal" P very much.

I had my first sexual experience with girl when I was 16-years old. If I remember correctly I hadn't started watching the more shocking P yet. So during my first time with a girl it was really hard for me to get an erection. I am sure that this was not caused by P but rather because I was really nervous about my first time with a girl. When I got the erection and got into action I didn't last very long. This happened twice but the third time was totally different. I got an erection without my girl touching me and I lasted for about 30 minutes. During the following sexual encounters with the same girl I didn't have any problems with ED but some problems with PE. The ED and PE problems really started to show when that girl dumped me. I started to PMO again because when I was with this girl I didn't PMO almost at all because I didn't feel the need to do it when I had a real girl to whom I had feelings for. After about 6 months I started to have casual sex occasionally with this same girl and that was the time I saw my ED and PE problems. Sometimes getting an erection wasn't hard at all, sometimes it took a while and some times I couldn't get an erection at all. When the casual sex with this girl stopped I had probably a year without any real sexual experiences. During that time and during the casual occasional sex time I PMO'd a lot. Well, when the time came to get sexual with a different girl, I was afraid of it. I was afraid about not getting an erection and not lasting long. Well I managed to get an erection but it took some time and I noticed that sex wasn't as pleasurable as it was before. And this experience was about 3 years ago. After that I have not engaged in intercourse but I have "fooled around" a bit.

When my ED problems started to show I was desperately looking for a cause to them. Back then I didn't connect my PMO and ED together so I was really frustrated  for not knowing the cause of my ED. That all changed when I discovered a couple months back. I read a lot of stuff on that site and started to make the connections. ED wasn't the only problem I had because of P. My life was in a state which was controlled by P. I didn't control the viewing of P because the P controlled me. I could go into even more detail but I wont because I would like for someone to read these things and help me out. I know this post is really long but please bear with me for a bit.

So that's the back-story.

So my questions for you guys would be about rebooting obviously. At first when I decided to quit P, I didn't quit MO immediately. During the first 4 days I MO'd 3 times and then decided that I would try to abstain from P and MO. Well after 3 days of no PMO, I MO'd and that was yesterday. I was trying to sleep but I was feeling so horny that I couldn't. The interesting thing is that during the first MO sessions after quitting P I couldn't get a solid erection. But yesterday I could easily get a good erection without any kind of artificial stimulation, not even fantasy. I just focused on the sensations and I got a good erection. It even felt much more pleasurable than before and the O was much more intense than before. I even lasted for about 15 minutes before O. So here is the question. Is this kind of thing normal? To see progress this fast or why did I get a good erection after 7 days without P and why did the MO feel so much better? I'm now seeing other effects of quitting P. I'm more motivated to do things and I feel more happy in general, it's like my mood is just so much better now even though I have been abstaining from P only for 8 days. The urges are sometimes almost unbearable but I hope that I will never PMO again. What do you guys do when you get the urge to watch P?

I'm sure that I have a lot more to ask but nothing else comes to my mind at the moment. I'm really sorry for a long post but I will be really grateful if someone is willing to read this and answer my questions :)

PS: I'm also sorry for any grammar mistakes, English isn't my native language so writing this post was quite hard and it took me an hour at least. 

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