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Topics - Albert

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Ages 40 and up / Doubt about fantasies...
« on: November 10, 2014, 02:00:39 PM »
I have a doubt. 10 days - yesssssss !  without PMO or MO. But the libido is around me !  And what about thoughts, fantasies, look for a person and imagine things ? Shall we must restrain that so ? Thanks for your oppinions.

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Ages 40 and up / Things we ought believe
« on: November 07, 2014, 09:17:30 AM »
Writing to a friend in this forum, I thought about the things that we ought believe:

1 - we are better that we think we are
2 - we have great power & we need believe in our own power
3 - we need to take the reens of our lives
4 - we can decide today what we want be & what we want for our lives tomorrow

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Ages 40 and up / My history - my journal
« on: November 05, 2014, 11:52:07 AM »
Well

This is my matter. This is my journal. This is my presentation.

I'm gay. With a very strong desire to be a correct person, with good moral values. Since I knew I was gay, I wanted to be a good person. I had have some relationships in my life, & I think I was a good partner. I probably am a good partner now, in this moment, almost ten years with another man, a fantastic man.

Remembering my first contact with porn I'll tell you something quite interesting:  when I was seventeen, I went to my first porn-movies. At that time, to see a porn movie, just going to a cinema. Before that I saw some porn magazines, my father had 2 or 3 little porn magazines hidden, not quite hidden for a teenager ! lol   Well, at the cinema, I stayed for 10 minutes & left disgusted. I returned home sick ! And pucked ! Who could imagine that this little boy one day would became a PMO addict !

In the 80's & 90's to be gay here in my country was not something very easy. The fear of being recognized. (I'm not a crazy fag...lol)  I like to be a man. Dress, walk & talk like a man. Because I'm just an usual man. I don't like effeminate people, and never felt the need to be so. But the libido was there, as the guilt. At that time, I didn't accept my sexual orientation. That was changed when I fall in love - a kind and beatiful love - with my second boyfriend, at my 30 years old. So I decided to revealing this to my family. And they accepted so fine.

The several times that I was single, for the above reasons & fears I started some pernicious behaviours: PMO, PMO, PMO, and when I was 26 - (yes, you read right) - I was virgin. And PMO were no more enough. So I went to the gay saunas (sick now just for remember), and promiscuous sex: truckers, taxi drivers, masons, the supermarket bathroom and etcetera. The libido was repressed by many  many years.... and so.... all that fucking bullshit happends.
Well, is unnecessary to say that after everyone of this behaviors I felt bad. Bad, very bad. Guilt, justbelieve, incomprehension, sad...etc.

Let me tell you how it worked:  I looked some few porn movies in my computer & the libido grew up so hard and strongly that I cannot control me. And run to a sauna, or a high risk situation as get in on the night like a "hunter".

At last almost ten years, since I found my wonderful partner, I never more did anyone of those things. Except.... yes ! PMO.

In reserarching this matter, I found the video and ebook. Now, the forum.  And it all made sense for me. All, all of this !!!

I want to tell you that I'm feeling accompanied by all of you. I'd like to ask from the deep of my heart that my sexual orientation does not mean any kind of barrier between you and me. I'm a man like the most of you, the most of my friends are straights, and I don't have sexual fantasies or feel attraction to anyone. Forgive me, but was necessary for me leave it well explained.

I'm hopeful - now in my fifth day - that the method, the forum, and especially the host of each of you will help me to become a new man, proud and without conflicts and addictions.

Thanks to everyone

Albert

First questions: 

1 -  fear about hackers or computer technicians could read later my posts
2 - I in several times prefered PMO (especially MO) to curb my own libido and don't run the risk of give in a temptation and be unfaithful

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Ages 40 and up / starting - 4 days
« on: November 04, 2014, 09:53:31 AM »
hello friends - i'm starting since four days ago.
good luck to everyone

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