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Topics - pruthukkc

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Ages 20-29 / Nightmare begins responsibility!
« on: June 14, 2019, 02:57:53 AM »
    Once again i am back here, last week i relapsed continuously so i was frustrated about my addiction. Since 2 years i am trying to quiting this addiction but i failed. I really want to heal but i always made wrong actions and then i suffered but one thing is i get tremendous information and experience about how to challenge withdrawals and path of success but every time i cant able to consistent with it and then i failed so consistency is the key. Its day 1 i am trying to heal myself and it takes really long time to do so  i knew the path just taking the actions  will decide the journey.

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Ages 20-29 / Rebooting tools
« on: May 16, 2019, 01:55:40 AM »
     Hi friends i am going to share you some android application links to boost up your recovery. They are really beneficial for every one.




              1. https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=anapana.winjit.com.anapanameditation&hl=en

              2. https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.losthut.android.apps.simplemeditationtimer&hl=en

             3. https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=info.intrasoft.habitgoaltracker&hl=en


   Tip: Practice everyday you will see amazing results.

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Ages 20-29 / Keep pushing yourself till the recovery!
« on: May 16, 2019, 01:29:31 AM »
 Hi guys after long time i came here because i am still addicted to porn. On 13th may i relapsed. Its important to make journal everyday now i will consistent about making my addiction journal.  My 10 days small goals are:

                                 1. I want to improve my sleep cycle so i decided to sleep @ 9:30PM and wake up at 4:30 AM

                                 2. Practicing meditation and yoga everyday! .
 
                                 3. Making journal everyday
 
     This goals are really important to me now. Its day 1 and i realize without inner change nothing will gave me peace.

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Ages 20-29 / Connecting the dots ( This year i will change)
« on: February 07, 2019, 08:59:16 AM »
 Hi rebooters! I found this site 2 years back and created ac to changed my pmo habit. I read so many peoples story, watched Garry Wilson's ted talk and also subscribed reboot nation and noah church's youtube channel after gaining lots of information and reading so many stories i convinced that i am addicted to p because lots of stories are similar to mine. 
  When i was 12 years old i started m. and its natural i guess but  after watching late night adult movies on HBO i turned on and started my fapping journey. Then i just m. and watched some times late night adult shows on T.V, not every day but once a week. After 3 years my parents gifted me a 3G internet modem and that time i had also my bedroom so i just closed my door and watched softcore p video on youtube, hollywood movies adult scene etc and jerked of at age of 16 i had girlfriend but when i met her i always felt nervous and had problem with brainfogg we dated in facebook and i never intimate with her i loved her so much but when i met her i cant build intimacy and after 1.5 year she dumped me after that i was totally depressed and turned into p videos. I dont knew that time whats reason she left me, whats wrong with me. My real addiction started at age of 17 and then i always used p videos for m. before that i always fantasizing and then m. After using frequently i started realizing that this is serious problem to me because i always felt uncomfortable in social life i had problem with self esteem and self confidence. One day i searching about m addiction and i found garry willson and noah be church's videos and suddenly my eyes were open i finally knew whats wrong with me. So i kept researching on addiction and i realized that i am porn addict after some time i found this forum and i created account i started my journey i relapsed so many times in past 2 years my highest streak was 28 days. I realize that this addiction is really strong and if you want to reboot you must aware about triggers, withdrawals and whats happening with you. Today i relapsed and i break my new year goal so now i am completely focusing on reboot and i will update my journal every day.

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Ages 20-29 / Ready for reboot
« on: December 29, 2018, 09:33:29 AM »
Hello rebooters! I glad to share that i am 2 weeks clean from pmo and ready for rebooting challenge. I will update my journal after every to weeks. Thanks to everybody for sharing story it helped a lot and motivate me to keep moving on pmo free path. :)

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Teens / 90 days plan for recovery!
« on: October 05, 2018, 04:34:48 AM »
 Yesterday i read do or die post and motivated for rebooting. Yesterday i relapsed 2 times. Today is 1 st day of my journey.[5/10/2018 I never  completed 90 days without pmo, now its challenge for me. 89 Days ahead to complete the 1st step of rebooting I make journal every 4th day or when i am close to relapse.







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Ages 20-29 / New Life!
« on: September 01, 2018, 10:45:53 AM »
 Hi rebooters! After relapsing so many times finally i am on track. I decide to make journal regularly. Today is my 10 th day pmo free i masturbated only once without p. Finally i found my reason to quit p, i am doing this because for one girl which i like and after completing this challenge  i will propose her! Its strong reason for me. In past nine days i tremendously suffer from anxiety, stress, low energy, headache but i knew  this things will make me stronger and stronger inside. Its new start and i am on day 10!

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Ages 20-29 / New beginning! Ready for 19 weeks challenge.
« on: August 19, 2018, 11:09:25 AM »
 Yesterday i relapsed, i jerked of 3 times after that i feel so weak inside and decide to quit. Finally! Now i am ready for this challenge,My main goal is making journal every day and track my progress. Its important to stick with it.
                  DAY 1 OF REBOOT

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Ages 20-29 / Finally i knew my problem! Ready for 90 days plan.
« on: July 23, 2018, 10:38:53 AM »
 Hello rebooters! I knew this site before 2 years and tried rebooting in my teen years but i failed so many times. I am turn 20 now and still i am suffering from this addiction. Yes! i am addicted and i accept it :) its really difficult for me to accept this situation but its true. On 21st July i was relapsed and i jerked of 3 times to porn and i realize that back to back i just falling in addiction cycle and messed up my life in every aspect. I always suffered by anxiety, low self confidence,low energy, headache etc and some times brain fog. My best friend said whats wrong with you, you are not same guy which i met 3 years ago! I told everything about my addiction to him but he don't understand my problems and p addiction science. So many friends laugh because of my weird behaviour and one friend said you are mentally off! It hurts but i knew my problem but i relapsed again and again its horrible situation for me. In past i lost my girlfriend and today i lost my libido! Yes i have PIED also, i test it myself. When i watched my erections were so strong  without p my penis is dead. I trying rebooting last 2 years but relapsed again and again. I learned so many thing by this addiction and now i am ready for reboot. I knew how is addiction cycle run.
               I also focusing on my fitness, mainly on my personal development, confidence and spirtual goals. I have knowledge about everything but i cant apply in my life and when i am going to apply i cant consistent on it. I knew meditate every day is important but i am not working on it, laziness really kills you and now i am really serious about my development. Today i decided meditate every day and also make my reboot journal in next 90 days regularly. I am working out last one and half year but gain nothing and during workout i am always anxious about my body, not so confident. I want to gain some muscle mass and i also following 12 weeks strength training program. Change is Science and i am really excited for my transformation. I knew if i stay calm and work on myself this rebooting journey will complete and now its really important to me because it gave big hole in my heart and i am trying to heal. P its really sex negative, its true i experience it. Before p i was social animal,my libido on peak and i masturbated without p but now its turn off me. When i watched girls its like objects of sex i never feel love for anybody. All peoples are like sex objects, its really horrible situation and i thought its serious psychological condition. P is rape culture, it is human trafficking and sex for money it didn't teach you love, romantic relationship it just kills your personal well being and i experienced it so now i am really serious about my reboot.  :)



           Day:1  Without PMO.

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 Whats up rebooters! :)
 
 Today i relapsed i cant control myself and jerk off by watching p. I am trying recovered from this addiction from past 2 years but i failed so many times and my highest peak without pmo was 42 days! after that i relapsed so many times and i stopped making my journal, i thought ignoring p addiction thoughts will recover me but it fails. My fighting tools were exercise, meditation,yoga etc. against p but i never attempt consistency and relapsed in between after that i depressed and try again to fight. So day i relapsed i got strong urges and skipped my workout(legs day ;D) i jerked off 2 times its fine to me because l learned not to depress once again and still fight for recovery. YES I AM ADDICTED TO PORNOGRAPHY AND ACCEPTED THIS I decide to  make my journal once again. 
         In life we suffered so many things we thought we search happiness in future or achieve something in future and then we will be peaceful but that is not true because life is river which flows and its anybodies out of control we cannot handle external situations. I wrote this because i inspired by one incident which happen yesterday, In my town there was a milk shop and one poor boy work as servant in this shop he is 19-20 years old, we are not friends but we know each other. In faced so many difficulties because of poverty and worked 2-3 jobs for survive, but still he was happy. I saw him 2-3 days before and today i read in newspaper that in highway accident, truck crushed his head and he dead so terribly! I really shocked by this but i learned so many things by this incident. YOU HAVE NO CONTROL ON YOUR LIFE AS WE THINK BECAUSE LIFE, NATURE WILL GIVE YOU ALL TYPES OF HORRIBLE SITUATIONS IN LIFE SO BE PREPARE MENTALLY AND HAVE GOOD MINDSET TO LIVE YOUR LIFE FULLY 8)PIED, WITHDRAWALS,ED ETC ARE FRUITS OF OUR KARMA WHICH NATURE GIVE US AND ITS NECESSARY BECAUSE SO MANY LIVES RUINED BY THIS ADDICTION, WE NEVER THOUGHT WHAT HAPPEN THOSE PORN STARS, HOW THEY LIVES THERE LIVES ETC WE JUST RUNNING FOR OUR SEXUAL PLEASURE THATS A TRUTH. SO THIS LESSONS MAKE US STRONG DURING REBOOT I I I THINK I DEMAND SO MUCH PORN AND NOW ITS TIME TO STOP TILL MY LAST BREATH BECAUSE ITS RUINED SO MANY LIVE PEOPLES ARE SUFFERED ALL SUFFERED LONG LASTING BECAUSE OF 10 MIN. PLEASURE. I KNEW ALL THIS THINGS INTELLECTUALLY BUT NOW I UNDERSTAND BY HEART ITS MESSED UP WITH SO MANY AND ITS NOT GOOD FOR HUMAN BEING


      This is day one of reboot i fight till my last breath.
 
                NEVER GIVE UP!

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Teens / I Relapsed.... #90 DAYS REBOOTING CHALLENGE.
« on: February 04, 2018, 09:15:43 AM »
Hello rebooter! After long time i opened this site because i relapsed yesterday night :D I thought i rebooted but still i got strong urges of watching p and i also face some withdrawals of addiction so i decided to make a journal about it. I set another 90 days rebooting goals with consistency in making  a journal on this site. This time i will kick this addiction. Please support me and post some advice on my journal.
           
                                DAY: 1

 Energetic day. I suffered from anxiety and stress but after doing meditation i feel very peaceful. I also create vlogs on my good and bad habits and played chess. I am really excited about my transformation goals.  Today i also decide to make journal regularly at least give 15 minutes to it.
                       
                                         89# DAYS TO GO. KEEP MOVING FORWARD, BE A WARRIOR 8) TO FIGHT AGAINST THIS EVIL.

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Teens / Reboot Challenge#
« on: September 20, 2017, 02:03:00 AM »
Whats going on rebooters! Once again i am back for rebooting. Yesterday night i relapsed after long time, this addiction controls my life over and over again, i thought i can get ride of  this addiction by not thinking about p and  my addiction but this trick failed. so writing a journal is important, expressing your thoughts, emotions, bad times through journal feels good. Today i decide to  stop watching p because it damage my brain. Its a decision to overcome all the negativity inside me, to wash out all the lust and find light inside me. I really want to change. This addiction sucks me so hard, i want to back my life.
Its day 1:  Withdrawals:  A) BRAINFROG
                                     B) HEADACHE.
                                     C) LOW SELF ESTEEM.
                                     D) LOW SELF MOTIVATION.

 Day 2:    Active day. its journey of changing your thoughts,mind and becoming good person within inside. Just keep moving on reboot path, we can do it together. 2 Days clean :)


Day 7:  All the time i thought p related thoughts, P addiction mess up my belief system but i decided stay stronger during reboot  and feel proud about myself. My vision is clear now, my problem is p addiction and it needs to destroy. I do meditation every day, i do every day my business activities and talk with so many strangers. When i interact with peoples i feel so anxious and thought they will know my addiction because of my  nervous behavior but enough is enough. Yes ! i was addicted to p and it controls me, so what? Today i accept my past and knew there is nothing to felt guilt and shame about that thing.  :) 1 week clean i am getting stronger and stronger.

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Teens / A)#21 days rebooting challenge.
« on: July 21, 2017, 10:18:24 AM »
  Hello rebooters! :) Once again i am back for rebooting. In  past i set so many goals, i failed so many times and suffered by this addiction But this time i want to change something, i want to beat this addiction forever. I am so lucky because i found this site and experienced peoples who get rid of this addiction. Love you reboot nation and this wonderful community.  P addiction control my brain and give me  crazy nightmares and sad days but at the end of the day it was decision to watch this shit and do m. so its time to change. I failed so many attempts of rebooting, my highest streak was 25 days without PMO :)  so regarding to this i set some goals and my why to stop watching p.
 
GOAL:   [1] A)  21 days without PMO. ( short term goal)
                      [2] B) 22   days without PMO. (short term goal)
                      [3] C)  23  days  without PMO. (short term goal)
                      [4] D)  24  days  without PMO   (short term goal)
 
                       90 days without PMO :) MAIN GOAL.
 


                                                                               Day 1
Today i decided to reboot once again :) first step of  success.  My anxiety and depression is fired up and it is difficult to handle so i decide to write  journal about my reboot. It feels so good to text down your problem and worries on this site :)


           
             

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Teens / i am Suffering from anxiety and low self confidence...
« on: May 19, 2017, 09:27:19 AM »
Hello rebooters!  I am suffering from anxiety and low self confidence. Please suggest some tips to tackle anxiety and share your experience how to handle this.... most of time I fear: huge crowd,   talk with eye contact etc... pls give advice. I appreciate that. Thank you in adavance :)

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Day 1 of reboot.... :) never give up.

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Teens / Help Me!!!!
« on: May 13, 2017, 06:43:38 AM »
Hello rebooters! :) Quick intro: I am from india and I am 18 years old. I was addicted to Pornography at age of 14-15. That time i mastrubated frequently. In highschool I was pretty shy boy and boys and girls always fun of me  so i  frusteted and after came to home watch softcore p and did m. that's how my addiction cycle goes till junior college. In past I lost my love, in school i was playing chess very well and i have also international rating but i never focus on this addiction, that time i tried but not knew any information about addiction.day to day my addiction grows my concentration power decreased, I got low grades in high school as well as junior college,I can't participate 1 year in any chess tournament because my concentration and weak health  and I also decreased my elo rating.My health is not good and i am underweight.I dropout college because of my addiction.I know i am addicted to pornography when i watch garry willsons ted talk show and decide to do rebooting 90 days but i relapsed 15 times in 90 days and fight some symptomes like anxiety,deprdepression, fear of public speaking etc. My highest peak of pmo free was 25days. I relapsed 26 th day and again next day.I feel so shameful, I don't know what to do. Please suggest some ideas,tips to tackle this addiction. It completely mess up my life. I need accountability partner. It's time to reboot completely and get rid of addiction. :)

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Teens / Rebooting......
« on: March 27, 2017, 11:29:43 AM »
FIRST DAY OF RECOVERY .... LONG ROAD AHEAD........... :D

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Teens / I relapsed 13 times in 90 days!
« on: March 26, 2017, 11:25:03 AM »
Hi Guys.This is my first journal. I am 18 years old and i am from India. I started P.M.O at age of 13.Pornography is really hardcore drug it affects my brain, my career, my relationship,my behavior, my health, my life. I thought it is very easy to get rid of this addiction but last night i relapsed so hard after seven days. so  i decide to start my journal and fight against Pornography. I feel so tired and lack of motivation now.

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