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Ages 30-39 / Re: Broccolini's diary
« Last post by PE30 on Today at 09:04:29 AM »
Hey broccolini, just wondering how you're getting on?
I use the drugs out of fear but don't like them.  I recommend waiting until you don't need them. 
Ages 40 and up / Re: Deadcat's Journal (Age 44)
« Last post by Deadcat on Today at 07:56:14 AM »
Day 56 of being PORNFREE

Well, my wife and I had great weekend.....despite my romantic failures.  Ugh!

First attempt failed due to inability to get erect.
Second attempt the next morning failed although I lasted a long time, I went limp before finishing.
Third attempt was pseudo successful as I finished but had trouble getting erect to start.

I made the mistake after the second attempt to finish with one hand while pleasing her with other.  She usually likes this but was confused about how I could stay erect with my hand but not with her.  It hurt her feelings and I regretted it.  I promised myself not to do that again until I am completely healed and its for both our pleasures.

I wanted to tell my wife several times this weekend but resisted.  We've had problems for 4 years now and she's questioning if this is just our new reality.  I have always told her that I'll fix it and it won't last.  I believed it then but didn't know the cause. I believe it even more now but she has grown tired and doesn't believe me.  I really just can't wait for my porn related issues to go away so that my wife and I can have a normal sex life again.

I have hope though from stories of men who it took 9 months or longer to get fully healed.  I had hoped my journey would be shorter but at 56 days I can honestly say I'm not there yet.  I just need to keep the faith.

No desire to watch porn at all.  I'm never going back. 
Ages 40 and up / Re: Desperado comes to his senses ...
« Last post by Cage Faraday on Today at 07:56:09 AM »
Day 1.1


I quit PMO
Water fasting

Regardless of my setback yesterday I am still committed to being free of PMO and excited about moving into the next phase of my life.  I am currently facing many storms financial, physical and spiritual.  My decision to water fast is rooted in everything I mentioned, I want to reboot, my body, my mind and my spirit.  I no longer wish to be who I've been, but I'm not sure what "me" will look like on the other side, I just know I can't continue with how and who I've been.  My biggest hope and prayer is for my wife's health that only God knows for sure what it actually is, not to mention her physical disabilities and injuries.  If I had half my wife's strength I wouldn't be here on RN, but I don't. 

As a child I was labeled a day dreamer, my teacher told my parents I was most likely going to dig ditches or pick up trash, I was told by my father I was too destructive and that I never finish anything.  I can still see myself in my mind, what I was doing when he said it.  My father isn't a mean man, but needless to say he never really understood me, but I'm sure he did the best he could.  So far I have done a good job at wrecking things and failing to complete projects I've begun.  My pastor and my wife both tell me that I should just forget what he said, but every time things start to cave in on me I hear his words again and more often than not, I walk away.  I know I sound depressed this morning and I am, but its one of the typical phases I go thru after a setback.  By tomorrow I will have re-summoned my enthusiasm and focus and be back on track in earnest.  I've never understood why its so important to me to win my father's approval, when I know its unattainable.  But still I go back again and again hoping this time I'll get it right...

Ages 20-29 / Re: I'm on my way!
« Last post by ImOnMyWay on Today at 07:37:29 AM »
Monday Funday! I am feeling really good today. I've talked to my friend more than the usual this weekend. I think what I said to her sparked something. I feel good that I finally broke out of my shell and said something. We'll see where this takes me.

As for everything else: (Pretty consistent I will say)

-Morning W was almost too much to handle going into Saturday AM. I was awake a majority of the night. Was like a Pogo stick that never lost its

-I have found that when watching tv, if a sexual scene comes up I look away.

-On Instagram if a picture of a pretty woman comes up it doesn't excite me like it once did. 

-I have noticed I really want to be around the girl I'm talking to. I really enjoy doing things with her. I feel this is helping me tremendously with my
 reboot/ refocus. It's allowing me to interact and feel for a real woman and not something fake on a screen.

-I'm working really hard not to MO! It's a bit difficult waking up with a MW and not doing anything. Actually it's extremely hard not to do anything. HAHA
 Will I Am discusses the dopamine high in his journal and in the P addiction section. Since P no longer exists in my life/ future my brain is trying to find a
 way to get a different dopamine high. In this case it's MO'ing. I am going to resist it and move forward. As he stated many times, P was a way for us to
 get a dopamine high. Because I am not pushing the P button to get the high, my brain is trying to get me to MO to get the dopamine high. It all makes
 sense when you break it down and really understand it. We need to WANT that dopamine high to be with a real woman! That is our goal here. To feel for
 your partner. I'll leave it at that.
That's all I have for now.

Your story is upsetting, I’m sad for you and your family. It’s toigh for your wife to go through this alone, I think you and her should seek professional counseling.   As much as she is hurt and mad at you there is still a part of her that loves you and in time I’m sure she will come back to you. Take things 1 day at a time.
 Five months very good, be proud . Who was the encounter with? A Stranger?  My last reboot I went just over 200 hundred days with no orgasm and when I was with a woman I blew my load without even having an erection, I thought that was weird
Ages 40 and up / Re: Looking for some advice
« Last post by papa on Today at 06:57:21 AM »
Day 149 and things are still tough. I have not O but I have the urges to do so. I feel that if I O it will take the edge off and I won’t feel so miserable.
Ages 20-29 / Re: Journey to a better me
« Last post by Jake323 on Today at 06:51:38 AM »

Ok, yesterday was a pretty good day, but I'm starting to get pissed off because I can never fall asleep on Sunday night before work, I don't know what it is, but it's really starting to get on my nerves ughhhh.
Success Stories / Re: IDK if I'm fully healed but I got some action
« Last post by ImOnMyWay on Today at 06:49:19 AM »
Congrats man. Well done. Keep up the hard work. Your story brings confidence in mine that I will also be okay.

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