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Messages - MioMio

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1
Ages 20-29 / Re: My Journal
« on: April 19, 2015, 03:56:16 AM »
Thanks for your support!

I see that you are a fellow motorcylist. What kind of bike do you ride?
I started riding nine months ago on a BMW F800GS Adventure and I am currently in the process of switching to a 1200 GS.
Riding my motorcycle has been a major outlet. On winter days it was especially intense, since my body  would fight the cold and my mind was able to shut off, only concentrating on the street. Somehow, riding has a very meditative effect on me and helps me to leave all the city stress behind. In fact, I love to spend hours over hours on my bike and see where it may take me.

2
Ages 20-29 / Re: My Journal
« on: April 17, 2015, 01:09:37 PM »
Hey there MioMio.

Congratz on the progress man.
After I'm finally done with that 90 day hard mode, finding the right balance of MO will be a problem for me as well. I was trying to find it some monthsago but was dealing with the chaser effect!

Keep up the good work! :)

Thanks for your reply. It has kept me from M'ing today. I already feel tension building up, but at the moment it still feels good.

3
Ages 20-29 / Re: My Reboot Journal
« on: April 15, 2015, 03:30:05 PM »
Don't mean to post to often but just wanted to write down my thoughts so can look back at this.
Due to heavy video gaming and porn use in the past my posture got really bad over time, I then started going to the gym a few years ago and my posture just got worse. Over the last year or so I've made significant improvements in anterior pelvic tilit which has pretty much fixed and I did this through core training everyday and some glute work.

This last day or so my confidence has been pretty low because I've realized even though I've seen significant improvements in my kyphosis and forward head, it is still pretty bad and I would like to improves these. I perform daily exercises and hope that it gets better but I'm not sure whether it is, just thought I'd post this so I can self reflect in future because there are times when I can spend about an hour looking in the mirror assessing how bad it is. People I talk to about say its hardly noticeable and I know its not the worst posture in the world however I'm a bit of an obsessive and when I start thinking about it I can't stop.

Have you considered consulting a physiotherapist or osteopath?

I'm not familiar with the health system in the UK. In Germany I can schedule an appointment with an orthopedist, who will then supply me with the necessary referral to a physiotherapist. At the moment I have to pay around 30€ for six appointments. I have been suffering from back and neck tensions, but also posture problems (hyperlordosis). Specialized balance workouts with my physiotherapist have improved my situation a lot. On a side note, they were also great to deal with my knee problems :) No advice on PMO though :D

4
Ages 20-29 / Re: My Reboot Journal
« on: April 15, 2015, 03:22:40 PM »
45 days! Awesome dude, well done.  8) 

In terms of the sleeping pattern thing, I've found getting up at roughly the same time everyday keeps me in a good cycle, even if I have a late night, I get up early so the next night I fall back into my usual pattern. Also f.lux is great for helping you feel sleepy at night if you're looking at a computer screen a lot.

I have just installed f.lux. This is one of the greatest software I have used in a while! I wish my blackberry would support this kind of screeen optimimzation!

5
Ages 20-29 / Re: My Journal
« on: April 15, 2015, 03:18:15 PM »
Hey miomio

Quote
I have found that one month without mo is too much, it just makes me too anxious.

I find the same, what I find is another outlet to get rid of the anxiety. For example if I'm feeling really anxious as haven't M'd in a while I'l go to the gym and really push myself or I'l go for a long walk/drive.
Just something to think about man.

Kee up the good work ;)

Thanks for the input. I may just go for another month after exams.

6
Ages 20-29 / Re: My Journal
« on: April 14, 2015, 03:50:35 PM »
try to avoid masturbation as well. that might help you too.

Hey mtaha!

Thanks for your many replies in this forum! It's great to get some posititve feedback and valuable tips. I see that you are really struggling. Is there any way I can help you with your reboot?

There are so many ways we can push ourselves to overcome pmo, that  it's great to have get a reminder of the basics every now and then.
I have found that one month without mo is too much, it just makes me too anxious. I must say however, that m calms me, but also dulls my stamina. Therefore, I will try to go with 2-week stretches of no mo and see what  it does for me :)

7
Ages 20-29 / Re: My Journal
« on: April 10, 2015, 06:25:45 PM »
Definitely stress and/or anxiety. I don't think p has much to do with it anymore.

8
Ages 20-29 / Re: My Journal
« on: April 09, 2015, 02:36:10 AM »
Sorry, for the time off. Like Vargulf, I was busy with school  8)

I had to put an end to seeing the above mentioned girl. After my first crush settled, I didn't feel much motivation to keep the contact going. Meanwhile, she was already building up emotions and I felt that it wouldn't be fair to keep going this way. In the end, I only met up with her when I didn't want to feel lonely or when I was super horny and knew she could fix it.

Which brings me to the topic of my last few posts. I'm still a virgin. It doesn't bother me as much as before, but I'm struggling with the fact that I get a full erection, but have problems maintaining it when it comes to sex. It's literally the moment before entering her vagina when the erection fails. I also noticed that I would be really horny and ready to enter her, but as soon as the genitals are about to touch, I lose all stamina.

I know that this is plainly psychological and will keep on going to get this issue solved :)

9
Ages 20-29 / Re: 20+ years of addiction. Searching for a new life
« on: March 27, 2015, 12:33:06 PM »
Updated penalties for bad actions:

1.  For P I won’t use PC and starve for 72 hours (reset P counter).
2.  For P subs I won't use computer for 72 hours and starve for 24 hours (reset P counter).
3.  For M I won’t use PC and starve for 24 hours (reset M counter).
4.  For trying to bypass web filter (even unsuccessfully) or for other unsuccessful attempts to watch P 24 hours abstaining from PC.
5.  For any bullshiting in front of PC, I won't use computer for 2 x bullshiting time + for every minute 4 push - ups or 1 pull - up or 3 one leg squads.
6.  For eating chocolate no PC after eating till the end of day + no food till the end of the day.

Gladly, I have been following your progress all the time, otherwise I would think that your penalties may be a bit extreme!! However, I understand that you have found a great way to control your urges.

Keep up the good work!

10
Ages 20-29 / Re: My Journal
« on: March 27, 2015, 12:30:33 PM »
Yes sometimes it maybe necessary to release the energy? Do you have any side effect MO'ing?

Definitely a good way to release energy! I came to a point where I was glad to have real boners again, but when you walk around with a bulge in your pants all day, it does get a bit strange!!!

In any case, I felt that MO'ing was a good energy release, but at the same time I had to control myself not to binge on MO again. This is probably the only side-effect. Otherwise, not much has changed.

On a side note, I got a great blow job yesterday. At first I was a bit anxious, because I wasn't sure if my ED would hinder me from getting an erection. In any case, once I got used to the sensation and started to relax, I had no problem keeping it up :D


11
Ages 20-29 / Re: My Journal
« on: March 25, 2015, 01:55:49 PM »
Quick update: I couldn't take the pressure anymore, I was literally feeling sick of horniness. Even when riding my motorcycle, I couldn't hold back boners. This had to stop, so I MO'd.

No worries, still on track with PMO :D

12
Ages 20-29 / Re: My Journal
« on: March 23, 2015, 05:09:34 PM »
90 Days man!!! Congrats!!!

You were strong for 90 days!!! Power 90! I bet now you have a feeling of a winner! If you dont, you should.:) If stayed strong for 90 days, you can do anything.:)

Thanks a lot. I am happy that you are on a good way too!

13
Ages 20-29 / Re: My Journal
« on: March 23, 2015, 05:06:29 PM »
92 days and I am exciting to reach 100! I am really, really confident that I am on a good way to stop pmo for good.

I am also very happy that my last successfull date has developed into a very promising path to a relationship.

Naturally, this is all very new to me. First girlfriend, new experiences, first sex. Basically, this is what I decided to implement in this journal during the next weeks. I know that some rebooters have been dealing with the issue of being inexperienced in relationships and a virgin in their mid-twenties. Hopefully, this plan will be crowned by as many good experiences as my reboot has brought me.

I have met this girl on online dating and we've been seeing each other for 2,5 weeks now. Yesterday I've slept over at her place and we were about to have sex. Truthfully, there was nothing in my way, except for anxiety of finally losing my virginity. I was literally shivering and stopped any further action. It was a really abrubt end and of course stirred some major insecurity in my partner. At this point I knew that sex is still a major issue for me and later on I decided that I trust her enough to be honest about my past experiences.

I opened up today and had a long discussion of my sexual past and we've tried to find reasons why it hasn't happened so far. At this point I don't really want to go into the details, but I must say that I am amazed by the astonishment in the girl. Even after repeating "virgin" for the fourth time, she was not willing to believe my words. Honestly, this reaction is probably part of my anxiety.
In any case, she accepted and was very tolerant about my situation. However, I am also a bit stirred by her argument that a good looking guy my age should have had sex with more than 10+ girls already, because it is considered normal. Well, here goes normal :D I understand that I have never taken the time to look at this issue from the other side, but with such an argument I tried to explain her what a huge amount of pressure it puts on a virgin my age.

In the process of my reboot I feel that losing my virginity will be a big step in overcoming porn for good. In the last months so many parts of my life have drastically changed to the better that I am honestly over-excited to finally overcome this last barrier that has been on my mind for such a long time.

At last, I had to realize that porn is not gone when one doesn't watch it. There is definitely still room for discussion on the topic of porn. Let's say it this way, she was willing to accept my decision to stop watching porn, but it didn't sound like she actually understand the full dimension of this decision.
I will keep this journal updated. Just like in the past, I am eager to read my post in a couple of weeks!

14
Ages 20-29 / Re: Rebooting Journal: Fighting For My Future!
« on: March 23, 2015, 04:43:07 PM »
I am thinking the next phase of my reboot will be to spend less and less time on my phone checking Facebook and Snapchat and the hundred WhatsApp groups I am in. If Ind that fb in particular kind of spikes your brain activity levels and dopamine too no doubt and hours can be spent aimlessly wandering the Facebook wall. This would have been an old trigger for me. See a hot girls photo. Click in
 Well you get the picture.

Even before rebooting, I knew that Facebook was a much bigger issue than most people want to admit. I can't remember when exactly I resigned from Facebook, but it is definitely worth it. Generally, all the excuses you make for watching porn, will concur with Facebook.

Guess what, I have not lost any friends. My social life has not diminished and ... I am meeting more old friends than before!!!

15
Ages 20-29 / Re: Rebooting Journal: Fighting For My Future!
« on: March 21, 2015, 04:59:06 AM »
It's great to have goals and targets, but seriously, take small steps and work on one problem at a time!

Go with pmo for a while and stay with it. As soon as you have control over your urges, wait a bit a work on your next problem.
I think a lot of people are overwhelmed by the current motivation hype. Being successfull in working out your issues doesn't need a Tony Robbins, but yourself! We all know our problems and we understand where the come from. Changing your routine means confronting your ego and slowly fixing the bad habits that have started to control our lives.

16
Ages 20-29 / Re: penis exercises and whether or not to continue
« on: March 21, 2015, 04:50:45 AM »
I did kegels in the beginning and stopped. When you are trying to reduce stimulants, it is definitely good to stop working out for a while.
After all, all it took was time to get back to full erections. Currently, I am seriously suffering of the worst random boners of my life.
This situation is worse than high school :)

17
Ages 20-29 / Re: 20+ years of addiction. Searching for a new life
« on: March 19, 2015, 05:46:31 PM »
Congratulations :) I've read it and it relly helped me https://get90days.wordpress.com/2015/03/18/how-to-heal-the-porn-addiction/

19 days! Yes! Keep up the good work! It is so worth it :)

18
Ages 20-29 / Re: My 150 day reboot begins (Day 7)
« on: March 16, 2015, 04:46:19 PM »
Hey MioMio, the reason why I chose 150 days is because I really want to make sure my brain resets. I do agree that short term goals are good from psychological standpoint. The way im treating it is 150 days is my major goal, while I set a bunch of mini goals week by week. For instance, my mini goal right now is to make through spring break without MOing. Does that make sense? Good luck on your reboot! 90+ days is very impressive with P!

It does make a lot of sense. Lately, I have been thinking about seeting a main goal too. I might as well gear for 150 days and continue with two week stretches in between.

19
Ages 20-29 / Re: My 150 day reboot begins (Day 7)
« on: March 15, 2015, 12:17:04 PM »
Hey there!

Why did you choose 150 days? Are you confident to reach your goal?

I like to divide my reboot up into two week stretches. It's easier and on a mental level, you have more success moments!
Imagining my reboot bar beiing 150 days long, would distress me every single day. But when you look at it and learn that in three days you'll have mastered another stretch, it feels awesome!

20
Ages 20-29 / Re: What time is it? The time is now. My Reboot Journal.
« on: March 15, 2015, 04:40:58 AM »
Thanks for sharing your experience and trusting this community with your personal matters.

I think you have taken the right step in realizing that you need to figure out, what is really wrong with you. From personal experience, I can only reinforce that rebooting requires so much self-awareness, concentration and strength that your psychological state will give you the opportunity to self-reflect on a very high level.

In December I began this second reboot, while being on vacation. It took me approximatley five days to figure out where I am right now and where I want to go in the next years. Perhaps, you should do the same. Take some days off and use your weak emotional state to self-reflect and set new goals!

Plainly giving your gf the ticket to this forum may not have been the smartest move. On a level of trust, I find that it is an amazing act of revelation, but without any info on the topic, some of the experiences you'll find here may seem repulsive. Have you given thought to sitting down together and watching some of the ybop videos? They offer a very clear stand on what porn does to your brain.

21
Ages 20-29 / Re: What time is it? The time is now. My Reboot Journal.
« on: March 11, 2015, 04:43:49 PM »
I'm also not going to beat around the bush about something:   I'm disappointed at the very limited interaction I have been able to garner here on the forums with other members. I am an adult man, so I am typically too proud to even go as far as I just did by saying that I am frustrated hardly anyone here is interacting with me and chiming in on my journal or even really replying to various things I say on other peoples' journals. But, as a saving grace to my pride, I will keep this from being overly emo.  I will be logical about it by asking this question: How can I be a better forum member so as to fully reap the rewards of this support network? With my understanding of it, it's pretty simple: write a journal thread, and comment on others'. I don't seek a one-to-one response ratio, and I guess maybe the first thing I can do is remind myself of that. But I am really putting myself out here which is very difficult for me, and so to not even get any acknowledgement makes me think that this is doing me more harm than good. Plus at the same time, I have very limited experience on internet message boards, so for all i know I could be breaking social codes left and right and I wouldn't have a clue.

I think a lot of us are dealing with your problem. It is completely normal and I find that everyone is seeking appreciation for something. In my first journal I was always looking for feedback, but at some point I had to ask myself "Do I want to be a writer, or reboot?!"

I decided to go with a second journal as in a diary. I write down my experiences and expect no work in return. Sometimes, someone may find my diary and comment on various sections. That's it :D At this point, I feel that a lot of my questions were already answered by myself, but I was just too scared, lazy or just anxious to discuss them. You have to challenge your ego!


22
Ages 20-29 / Re: My Journal
« on: March 11, 2015, 02:02:20 PM »
Thanks for sharing your experience! Good luck on keeping up with your reboot :D

23
Ages 20-29 / Re: My Journal
« on: March 09, 2015, 05:51:29 PM »
Day 78

I have been using an online dating system for exactly one week now and went on three dates so far. I must admit that I wasn't sure about the whole thing because browsing profiles reminded me a lot of browsing porn.
Luckily, I noticed that my genuine interest for people has been a big plus in these meetings and I have to state that I completely underestimated old fashioned rituals such as holding the door hopen.
I met an amazing girl tonight :) What a great feeling! But what surprised me even more was that I was able to be the charming guy, who would normally appear after some drinks.
I relate the majority of this progress to the reboot, because apart from an attactive exterior I was actually really interested in meeting the characte behind this pretty face. It's the same old song all of us have been singing, stop objectifying and start being real!

Big night, I'm pumped to continue this path!

24
Ages 20-29 / Re: My Journal
« on: March 08, 2015, 05:26:55 AM »
I will stay with my usual plan and always add two weeks. It is working out very well for me because as a goal it is just enough to feel confident about continuing, but at the same time I also have pressure to make it happen.

So, if I come close to relapse, I tell myself that it's just x days more and then I will have reached my next goal.

25
Ages 20-29 / Re: My Journal
« on: March 07, 2015, 05:26:15 AM »
Yes! Although I must comment on that. Last time I had been going hard mode for approx. three weeks and around day 70 met this crazy russian chick, then at day 72 had a wet dream. I just couldn't stand the urge to pmo anymore, I had to find a release.


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