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Messages - mcube

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1
I haven't watched 'porn' in the traditional sense like porn sites, for at least a year.

However there is no limit to artificial stimuli like (social media) too many 'sexual' images I see involuntarily.

I may occasionally masturbate once a month, again it is not intentional just involuntarily.

Although my attraction towards real girls has increased I am still not able to perform with them.

2
I have been off any kind of "porn" regularly, however I did relapse several times and social media has eventually made me ogle at hot women.  It's still occasional. I have been in the reboot process for 5 months now.

Recently I met this really cute, hot girl and I felt I could perform. I initially got aroused but my ed got hold of me, I am wondering whether there is problem in me or the steps I need to recover properly.

I do exercise, try to eat healthy but I am not as aroused to real women.

3

To give some background on my journey when I first stopped watching porn, I didn't masturbate for 8 weeks. After a brief sexual encounter (my only one for last 65 weeks) I've masturbated around once a week on average but four or five times have taken a break for a month or so. When I have taken a break I've often had a wet dream after about a month. I've sporadically used dating apps on and off but haven't done so for the last 3 months.


You will need to go in 'monk' mode that is abstain from any kind of (sexual) images that fact that you are using dating apps is major mistake that I have made during my rebooting process. You will need to abstain from any kind of visual image of a female (PC, Smartphone, TV, Mags) etc.

I know its very difficult in this social media age, where one can easily see sexually alluring women on so many platforms, it's best to get rid of the smartphone for a while. Of course u need to abstain from sexual thoughts and wanking !




4
After completely withdrawing from porn and other sexual screen images, I have been able to get aroused and masturbate just by thinking/looking at a real girl, which I wasn't able to do during my addiction days. This is a first step of some form of recovery and it's a testing method, however you should not be doing this at all during or after the recovery because again 'masturbation' is another form of artificial stimulus for the body.

I would suggest that you lay off sex, masturbation and most importantly any form of sexual thoughts for at least several months before you try to have sex. I have been able to lay of sexual images but not sexual thoughts which hampers my natural sexual response.

5
Porn Addiction / Re: Relapsed Last Night
« on: April 01, 2019, 04:24:33 AM »
Although I have completely shut out any form of sexual imagery there are times often unintentionally that I end up looking at such images while being online. Anytime someone is online, even reading a news story there would be provocative sexual images all over the net.

Anyway, I don't if this counts as a relapse or recovery, but I have been able to masturbate by simply looking at a real girl. It's been almost 3 months since going hard mode. Looking at the 'girl-next-door' she often teases me from her room, so one day while she was changing it really turned me on, and I masturbated just by simply looking at her (she was ok with it).  It was an incredible feeling for me due to the fact that I could get hard by looking at a real girl, without needing to watch sexual images from pc, mobile, magazine, tv etc. While on the other hand I want to remove any form of PMO during my recovery. I just hope ogling at girls and masturbating doesn't become an addiction.

6
This is also happening to me, and for me it's due to the food. The healthier I eat the better progress I make, like whenever I am having red meat or having sweet fruits I get lot's of hormone rush. Other days when I don't eat such food there is nothing going on with me. I am starting to get attracted to "real" women but I also have to be cautious not to get addicted to just watching women.

7
Porn Addiction / Re: Changing Like The Weather
« on: February 26, 2019, 10:55:56 PM »
We unknowingly wired our brains to something that is highly pleasurable and highly available. Now what? There's no manual on how to get out of it, we're pretty much the first generation that's trying to figure all this out, only now realizing how dangerous this stuff is.. Keep at it man.

Not exactly true because most cultures, religions have stated from a long time ago the dangers of sexual imagery, hedonism, sexual indulgences although not pointing out the 'modern day' internet porn they were clear about the dangers of sexual 'degeneracy'.  I remember back in the day when kids were using porn 'magazines' there was constant warning from elders and 'pmo' users who were also suffering from ED due to 'pmo' from magazines, pictures.

It's just not 'natural' for having 'sexual' dynamics in the form of 'imagery' that is 'pmo' with nude images from magazines, pictures, internet, or even fantasy, while fantasy is natural it becomes a problem due to 'overindulgence' from other factors. I also talked with guys who were porn 'magazine' addicts, collecting nude images of celebrity posters, statues, artwork they were not hooked on internet porn but they also suffer from ED and they said it's due to their 'addiction' to the sexual 'imagery'.



8
Porn Addiction / Re: Intellectuals Yet Idiots
« on: February 14, 2019, 10:18:49 PM »
Quote
Because they are not P addicts. I would gladly ask them to start watching P for the next 10 years and let's see what they will do about their fucking limp dicks when they will try to fuck their ugly wives. I will be so happy to make a fortune selling Viagra. Of course, when you clearly know you are an addict, there is not a matter of "whether or not" anymore. Everyone here knows he is a P addict. This is why this forum has been created. And there is the research too but they say there is no research... I would not listen to everybody who calls himself "Ph.D".

The more I learn about psychologist the more I know they have no clue about reality of ''human nature'. It's like economists who have no clue about the 'real world' economy. Most of the Phd's especially women tend to stay single they mostly get off with porn.   

9
Porn Addiction / Re: Intellectuals Yet Idiots
« on: February 12, 2019, 11:27:20 PM »
These same "objective" ivy league frat boys are the ones who shouted "No means yes!" in unison at Yale or some other rich boy school. The idea that doctorates are less personally motivated than others is a myth that dies hard.

They literally have no 'skin in the game' (n.taleb) unless they are willing to accept truth by understanding and talking to p.addicts they just can't figure this shit out.

Get engaged folks, on various social media, interact and call out their BS.

10
Porn Addiction / Intellectuals Yet Idiots
« on: February 11, 2019, 10:45:22 PM »
The one thing that pisses me off more than any other thing is when I see these 'smart ass', sophisticated, ivy league, Phd idiots going on about how pornography doesn't cause 'addiction' / 'problems'. 

I am pretty active on twitter and I follow Gary Wilson, Gabe Deem and I feel most of you guys should also. In one thread they were pointing out the flawed research methodology that the 'pseudo scientist' peddler Josh Grubbs was doing about pornography research. In that twitter thread I saw plenty of Phd idiots who were backing this 'BS vendor', so I engaged with these IYI (Intellectuals Yet Idiots) to see if they understand the gravity of the problems.

In one direct message in twitter I sent to this ivy league woman (https://twitter.com/DrCristinaF) I told her how "Porn addiction is real, more specifically pics/screen addiction to hot women."  "Just by looking at ur hot sexy profile pic makes me want to fap..!" (Believe me back in the porn addiction days if I saw hot ivy league women I would do just that) She then blocks me and takes a screen shot and posts in on the BS vendor twitter post link here : https://twitter.com/JoshuaGrubbsPhD/status/1093925587440291840

Although it was a satirical troll message it got enough attention that these intellectual idiots did something about it. I also sent messages to other pseudo experts in relation to the post/research. Remember guys it's an uphill battle especially when these 'pseudo intellects' are merely mocking such a serious issue and problem that is facing young guys in society. Get engaged with these folks message, write, tweet, do whatever small things that you can do to get the message out because it is important. 

11
I am also having the same thoughts as well. It's like the brain needs to have a reset button and one of the ways to do it so to have a emotional and physical experience like ayahuasca, which will no doubt aid in the recovery process. I am planning to go to south east asia for at least 3 months and live like a monk in the mountains away from every screen, people, women etc. Anything that will give the mind a boost, a refreshing experience, spiritual experience will no doubt aid the healing of the mind.

12
It took 3 years, that's really worrying matter. I don't know what the neurological aspects of the healing process but it certainly needs to be looked into. Although going hard mode is next to impossible because of the bombardment of sexual images as well as social interaction which makes the rebooting process very difficult.

Each individual is wired differently, and taking 3 years although uplifting shows a worrying pattern of the extent of 'sexual images' and its impact on society.

13
Porn Addiction / Re: Are we losing the culture war?
« on: January 07, 2019, 12:42:36 AM »
If one looks at 'traditional' religious cultural society they always 'cover' the woman and it has to do with the sexual dynamics of people. Most porn addicts know that sexual 'fantasy' is harmful and causes them to relapse. By covering woman people figured out was an effective way to prevent sinful lust as well as sexual fantasy. As a recovering porn addict every time I see a hot woman out on the park just the sight of her, her hands, feet is enough for me to start 'fantasizing' about them.

Most pious followers also avoid physically touching woman, you hear on the news pious leaders refusing to sit next to a woman on the plane, although it sounds 'paranoid' but it was put in the religious code to prevent sexual lust. Every time I come in contact with a hot woman, even smelling her is enough to start relapsing.

Maybe because I am rebooting that I am seeing the obvious connection between religious conducts and the harm of secularism.

14
It's like the mind has been parasatized by the 'pornographic' virus. Even though I stopped watching porn for several years, I was back to doing other sexual imagery stuff like watching girls on social media, TV, magazines, and EVEN when I tried to stop that, I had the inevitable sexual 'fantasy' cravings.

Just going for a walk in the park and looking at a woman's body, feet was enough for me to keep starring at her, and then 'fantasize' about her whole day. And yes the 'hardcore' porn I watched a decade ago are still imprinted in my mind like an infected parasite. My fantasy starts if I look at a 'sexy' woman, just a sniff of her scent makes me want to have her.

I decided to effectively have my reboot process I need to avoid looking at women, touching them, thinking about them, I know it sounds very paranoid but I feel it's another essential step from this parasitic mind. I also feel that other 'traditional' religious cultures made sure to 'cover' their women and it may be due to the deep sexual dynamics of our society. Most pious followers also avoid physically coming in contact with women, again due to the sexual dynamics.

15
Don't confuse 'morning wood' with erection, those are two very different things. I used to think that way and it made me relapse.

Only way to see if you are truly cured is if you get a boner when with a girl.

16
It appears you need a complete reboot, not only from porn but any kind of 'visual stimuli', as well as sexual 'fantasy'. It's better that you avoid being with any girls physically, because being with girls will cause you to have 'fantasy' and that will lead to masturbation and orgasm. I know it can be very difficult, but you literally need to go 'monk' mode, that is not only avoid any kind of visual stimuli but also avoid women because your head is messed up and it needs time to repair and heal.

Only when you have healed properly you will know certainly, if not then go to a knowledgeable doc who understands PIED.

17
Porn Addiction / Re: Cravings in the morning
« on: December 16, 2018, 10:09:49 PM »
Apparently your body can confuse morning wood and needing to take care of the morning bodily functions as arousal.

Indeed the morning wood confuses the body with arousal, and combining with sexual 'fantasy' is like a toxic mix. As others have mentioned masturbating in prone position is harmful it confuses the mind and messes up the arousal function when being with a real girl. As I have abandoned any kind of 'visual' stimuli like pc, smartphone, tv, magazines I get this immense cravings for 'sexual' fantasy.

Last night I was at a holiday party and out shopping with so many women bumping into me, I could not stop 'fantasizing' about them, which again is a problem for rebooters. Not only do we have to give up 'visual' stimuli but we also need to control our 'fantasy', I never knew that this would be such an addiction.


18
Porn Addiction / Cravings in the morning
« on: December 16, 2018, 02:10:11 AM »
I have had this habit even before internet porn, that was to masturbate in prone position. I learned it from school, one of the kids told me to try it on the bed lying down, it started around 13/14 yrs old. Ever since then I have been masturbating in prone position, adding internet porn to this mix and you get all the problems in the kitchen sink.

As I am trying to relapse, I no longer have cravings for internet porn, but I have this sudden cravings for 'fantasy' and orgasm, what usually happens is I would get morning wood in the early morning so I am not fully awake, but enough to get sexual fantasy and then masturbate in prone position. Usually in the early morning I get severe cravings, and morning wood which makes masturbation easy while lying down on the bed, and I would MO this happens only in the morning. Any idea or suggestions to prevent such actions.

19
Porn Addiction / Re: Not just porn but all forms of sexual images
« on: December 04, 2018, 08:29:01 AM »
Because my life's history is, unfortunately, the way it is, I am in a moment when seeing girls anywhere makes me want to relapse, be it even normal movies or non-sexual pictures. FUUUCK!

LOL I used to get those cravings, but I can control it now. Also it's best to go totally 'monk' mode that is literally turn into a monk head to south east asia, live in isolated mountains for several months, I really hope to do that to get my shit together.

20
Quote
I've tried that in the past but it didn't work. Hell even masturbating before sex doesn't work for me. Porn basically destroyed
my ability to have successful sex with women.

It is now a steep hill process for recovery, it looks like you need 'professional' help regarding this issue. There are various drugs available like u can take it orally, inhaled, and there are sprays that prevent PE. It's best that you go to the right person who understand PIED, and then they can give u the right medications.

Once u get used to the medications you will slowly see improvements where you won't need them. Also your partner needs to understand this and work with your issues.

21
Porn Addiction / Re: I screwed up and need help
« on: November 28, 2018, 10:47:26 PM »
Good tips mcube, thank you. Keeping my mind busy with other stuff is definitely something i should do, do you have some recommendations aside from pursuing women ?

Make small changes to your everyday life, even things like using a different pc/mobile ensures as a reminder not to relapse, and most addiction is prevented this way. Another helpful thing other than a 'holiday' would be to hit the gym, or do all kinds of exercises, marathons etc keeping your body physically in shape from years of abuse is another important aspect. Don't forget to eat healthy meat and eggs which would boost your strength.

22
Porn Addiction / Re: I screwed up and need help
« on: November 27, 2018, 11:56:53 PM »
These are common yet silly mistakes. You really need to put things in order, first by cleaning your room. Changing your room, cleaning it, will ensure that you don't fall back to the same addiction. Then another extremely beneficial thing you could do is to go for a holiday on the weekends, it would be better if you could remove yourself from the 'environment' that you are in for a couple of weeks to reset your life, your mind.

If you really want women, then you should pursue the goals that you need to get women, that is part of the recovery process, PMO is not. Being negative and depressive won't help at least you should TRY to pursue women and that should keep your mind busy rather than wanking off to 'images' on a screen.

23
Partners of Rebooters and Addicts / Re: How to have sex again?
« on: November 24, 2018, 11:50:22 PM »
There are so many factors that come into play. Both of you guys should do gym regularly, and eat healthy foods. Try to change things for him, by making him relaxed, being supportive of him is very beneficial. If both of you can take a short holiday abroad, enjoy yourselves, don't worry about the problems, then it creates a different mindset for both of you, and this aids in the recovery process, but a holiday abroad would do wonders.

24
Porn Addiction / Re: Can I see arousing non nude photos?
« on: November 24, 2018, 11:40:02 PM »
This is another common mistake that I and many rebooters did. I also felt good after rebooting but I told myself since it is not 'porn' I can see other 'sexual' images that are non nude. This led me to being 'addicted' to those images, creating arousal for me, which is not natural for the recovery process, because you only want to get arousal only when looking at 'real' people not some picture.

Here I am again doing the rebooting process, because I fell for the same trap only it wasn't porn but arousal from other forms of sexual imagery.

25
I think when humanity takes a look at ourselves in the mirror, we have to learn from our past, the rich history, heritage and the wisdom of humanity. It isn't a coincidence that most people, cultures, religion across the world frowns upon those who view porn, sexual images because they have seen from the past what it does to a person.

What really bothers me is the fact these 'smart' ass phds researchers which vehemently deny anything wrong with porn, or say porn addiction. Humans are a lot smarter now but we are not wise. It is wisdom that provides valuable knowledge about us. The tsunami of the problems, that arises from PIED people knew, but we didn't listen.

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