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Topics - 57yrold

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1
Man, this stuff is NOT linear.

22 weeks today of NO PMO. 

Been up and down overall, but this past few weeks has been a huge flatline.  I'm really down.  Very low energy, very low libido, pretty damn depressed.

I guess that's just the way it goes.

Still have ED, but I'm patient and I'll wait.  Gabe took six months, and I'm only at 5.  That being said, I've decided that I will set a date of two years.  October 18, 2019.

If my ED isn't cured by that point, it probably isn't going to be cured.

However, even if it's not, I'm still not going back to PMO.

2
**Forum Rules-Guidelines-Suggestions** / Sent messages?
« on: March 07, 2018, 10:52:21 AM »
How do I view messages that I've sent?

When I look at 'My Messages', I just see my inbox.  (I did check the box to save a copy of the sent message)

Thanks

3
Proud of my accomplishment and I feel a lot better.  Less anxious, much more at ease in crowds/public.

Unfortunately, no progress on the PIED.  In fact, no erections since I went into flatline shortly after starting no PMO.

I've seen posts on here of guys taking much longer than 20 weeks to have their erections return though, so I'm staying strong, NO PMO, and waiting patiently.

My wife is very understanding and supportive.

Any thoughts or suggestions from anyone?

Thanks

4
Almost at 10 weeks, which is still early, but...

Positives: 

Anxiety is much better.  More relaxed and less irritable with people in general.
My wife and I are physically and emotionally closer than in a long time.
I have no desire to look at porn ever again.
I'm much more relaxed about the process than I was when I started.
I'm just calmer in general.

My only question, mainly for the guys who have successfully rebooted, is:  What was happening when you were rebooting?

Did you get ANY erections?  ANY morning wood?  Or was everything dead for a significant amount of time, then slowly began to get better?

I know I was in a flatline for a long time, but my emotions and a bit of libido tell me that I'm at least partially out of that.  But I haven't had an erection this whole time.  No morning wood either.  And no wet dreams.

I did have low T, but I'm getting pellets inserted in my hip, and supposedly my T numbers are in the acceptable range.

Thanks for any info here.  I appreciate everyone on this forum!

5
Success Stories / TWO MONTHS!
« on: December 18, 2017, 02:38:38 PM »
Two months today no PMO.

I still have to say my ED is not cured, but in general I feel much more relaxed.  I was really suffering with social anxiety.  Some days I couldn't leave the house.

I'm out and about much more lately, and less irritable when I'm out in public.

I'm also super attracted to my wife.  We're kissing, cuddling and touching more than we have for years.

So far, so good, and I'll keep going until my ED is gone.  Only then will I O, PIV.

And I'll never look at porn again.  Ever.

6
**Forum Rules-Guidelines-Suggestions** / Is there a tracker, or counter?
« on: December 16, 2017, 05:58:12 PM »
Is there some kind of tracker or counter that I can set up here?

I'd like to display the number of days that I haven't PMO'd.

Thanks in advance for your help!

7
Porn Induced Erectile Dysfunction/Delayed Ejaculation / One day at a time!
« on: December 16, 2017, 01:16:07 PM »
That's all you need to do.  No PMO for one, single day.

One day at a time!

(I've done that 59 times now.  So far, so good.)

Now if I can just make it through TODAY!

;-)

8
Porn Induced Erectile Dysfunction/Delayed Ejaculation / SSRI Causing ED?
« on: December 14, 2017, 10:57:47 AM »
I've struggled with depression for a long time and my GP has tried various meds.  Some of there were SSRI's.

I do remember taking something at one point, and about two weeks after I started I had an incredibly difficult time achieving orgasm.  I stopped taking it immediately, but I think I may have been on other SSRIs at some point.  The only thing I'm taking now is Welbutrin, which I don't think is an SSRI.

From what I've read, SSRIs can cause long lasting sexual side effects.  I'm wondering if this might be the cause of my ED.

Any thoughts on this?  Anyone else take an SSRI and have problems?

Thanks

9
I think I read that fantasizing about porn is bad.  I believe it reinforces the same pathways that porn itself does.

However, what if I'm with my wife and I'm fantasizing about what I want to do to her?

10
I may very well take longer than 90 days, but just seeing the counter at 45 seems to be a milestone.  I'm proud of myself, and I know I'll succeed.


11
Couldn't it just be that we're old?

12
I'm 40 days no PMO.

While I'm proud of myself for this achievement, I'm not seeing any benefits at all.  Not really even seeing any changes.

I realize that it's still early.  I know Gabe took six months, so 40 days is nothing, but I'd like to at least see something.

No wet dreams, no morning wood, no erection when my wife and I fool around.  Zero.

The only thing that's different is that I'm super attracted to my wife.  I can't keep my hands off her and we kiss, cuddle, and fool around often.  I love her so much!

NO PMO though.  Even when we're messing around.  Neither one of us touches my penis.

Any thoughts or suggestions?

THANKS!

13
Ages 40 and up / Raging depression
« on: November 18, 2017, 04:49:26 AM »
30 days no PMO.  Been in pretty much a solid shitty flatline.

My mood has kind of gone up and down, but generally down.  Anxiety gets really bad sometimes.

Penis is dead.  There is no life in my penis what so ever.  I'm quite positive I'll never get an erection again in my lifetime.

We're supposed to go on a Thanksgiving vacation later on this morning, but if I could I'd cancel the whole thing and just stay home in bed.  Fortunately I think most of our reservations are not refundable, so I'll be forced to go.  Will try to make the best of it.

Can't sleep tonight, which doesn't help anything, but yesterday, and especially today I feel incredibly depressed.  Not suicidal, but just want to lay in bed with the blinds closed, the lights off, and just lay there.  That sounds like heaven to me I want to do that so bad.

Either way, I'm not going to PMO, so at least there's that...

Good luck to everyone here.  May you achieve your goals and live your dreams

14
Ages 40 and up / Quote: "Dude, you're 57. Could it just be ED?"
« on: November 17, 2017, 08:05:53 AM »
I posted something on another forum and someone replied with that.

"Dude, you're 57.  Could it just be ED?"

I assume he was some young punk.  57 is a fossil to him.

Anyway, with all my anxiety and insecurity right now, I (of course) started freaking out about it.

What if I'm going through all this hardmode shit for nothing?  What if I hardmode for 5 years and still can't get an erection?  WTF then?

??

15
Porn Induced Erectile Dysfunction/Delayed Ejaculation / No relapse
« on: November 16, 2017, 05:46:28 PM »
I'm 100% confident that I'm not going to look at porn again.

How cool is that?

If you've got a good streak going, DON'T SCREW IT UP!  KEEP GOING!

16
Background:  ED and DE, so I stopped porn about 8 weeks ago. The first 3-4 weeks my wife and I didn't do anything, but then around week 4 we had three nights where we fooled around, but no intercourse.  She tried to make me O, but I couldn't so I had to finish myself.

I didn't like that, and decided to do NO PMO completely.  So I reset my counter, and now I'm at almost 4 weeks no PMO. 

My question is about fooling around with my wife.  We're doing it a lot.  Mostly, I'm doing stuff to her.  Kissing, touching, playing, oral, etc.

She O's every time, but neither of us touch my penis.  I don't MO at all.

I'm really into her body, and I'm loving being with her.  I get very excited.  Partial erections, but I just ignore it and pay attention to her.

It seems like this is perfect.  I'm totally removed from artificial stimulation, and completely involved with her physically.  I feel like I'm really re-wiring to her.

What are your thoughts about this?  Am I off base on my thinking?

Does a 90 day reboot mean nothing sexual at all?  Even with a real person? 

Thanks for your opinion.  I want to get my erections back, and I want to make sure I'm doing everything I can!

17
Three weeks since my last O.  Been through a flatline, and in some ways I'm still there.  Anxiety and depression mostly.  Not sleeping well either.

However, I do feel that my libido is better.  I've been super excited by my wife.  We cuddle and touch every morning when we wake up, several times throughout the day, and big time at night when we get in bed. 

Things get sexy pretty often and I make her O, but don't myself.

I feel like I'm really into her.  She feels so great and I get excited touching her, kissing her, and smelling her.

I'm still not getting full erections.  I do get partially hard, but not nearly enough to penetrate.  I just kind of blow this off and keep doing what we're doing.  No touching my penis.

So my ED is definitely not gone.  Still pretty bad.  I have no idea about my DE, as I haven't tried in 3 weeks.  Obviously I have a long way to go on my reboot, but I'm feeling seriously re-wired to her.

Has anyone else seen this?  I have no desire to look at porn, but I just can't wait to cuddle with her and touch her body. 

Am I re-wired?  Before I'm rebooted?


18
Seven weeks since I last looked at porn, but only a little over two weeks since my last O.  That was with my wife, but since then I've decided I should have gone hard mode.  Now I'm No P, No M, No O.

I know I'm going to take more time, and that's OK, but man I feel like crap lately.  Depressed/Anxious.  No Libido.  Dead/limp penis.

This is just a flatline I'm going through, but man it sucks.

I still feel confident that I won't ever look at porn again.  I've got that.

However, I'm still completely lacking confidence that this process is going to get my erections back.

Really, it's only been two weeks, so I have a long way to go.  I understand that.  I guess the good news is that I'm going to keep going no matter what. 

I really want to have good, healthy sex with my wife again.  I just love her with all my heart.

But right now I'm really, really down and this really, really sucks.

Frustrated as hell...

19
I haven't looked at porn since September 15th.

I've had three nights fooling around with my wife where I did MO (with her), but I've decided I should have started with hardmode, so No P, No M, and No O for at least 90 days, or longer, if my ED/DE is still a problem.   I'm sure I can do this.

My question to everyone here is in regards to confidence.

I'm absolutely confident that I won't watch porn again.  I've had no desire, and I can't imagine a relapse.  Not going to happen.

No, it's confidence in the reboot that's seriously lacking.

Right now, with my shitty mood, low libido, and shriveled up, dead penis, I'm 99.9% positive this isn't going to work.  I'm not going to get my erections back.  I would bet money on this....

Does that matter?  I feel like I should be all gung ho about how great a reboot is, and how wonderful things are going to be after I come out the other side, but I just don't.

Right now all I feel is pessimism and frustration.

Does it matter if I feel like this isn't going to work?

Thanks for your thoughts and suggestions.


20
Porn Addiction / I'm not sure I was addicted
« on: October 26, 2017, 09:57:29 AM »
I used to watch porn a few times a week, and did escalate to some nasty stuff, but when I stopped looking at it, I just stopped.

That was six weeks ago, and I've had no desire to look at it again.  Nothing close to a relapse.

Seems like it was pretty easy for me to quit porn, so I'm wondering if I was truly addicted.

Not that it matters really.  I have terrible ED and DE, and I'm on hard mode right now (9 days since last O) to reboot.

Just curious if I was actually addicted or not....

21
Tomorrow will be six weeks since I looked at porn.

I did have three nights where my wife and I fooled around and I made myself cum.  Last one was 9 days ago.

I've since decided that I should have started with No P, No M, and No O, even if I'm with my wife, so I reset my counter after that last night.

So 9 days so far, no PMO.

Still have little to no feeling in my penis.  Small, and absolutely nothing even close to any erections.

Anxiety is through the roof.  I'm about to have a panic attack today.  Depressed as shit too.

Sleep is pretty terrible.  Can't fall asleep for a long time, then I wake up 3-4 times in the night.  (I also have this weird leg-spasm thing)

Libido is very low, except when my wife and I cuddle and kiss.  I get pretty turned on, but again, zero life to the penis. 

I still have very little confidence this is going to work, but I'm not going to give up.  No P, No M, No O until either things get better or I die....  Don't want to go back.

This is incredibly frustrating.  I'm frustrated that I didn't start with hard mode.  I'm frustrated that I seem to be stuck in this flatline.  I'm frustrated that I'm seeing no improvement what so ever.

Just really frustrated.


22
It's been five weeks since I looked at porn, but I had three evenings with my wife where she couldn't make me orgasm, so I had to finish myself.

I noticed last week that later that night I had really strange dreams, then the next morning back to serious depression.  (I hit major depression at the three week mark, then started to feel a bit better, at least as far as the depression.)

Now I've determined that I should have started with no P, no M, and no O.

I'm bummed, because if I had started hard mode when I stopped P, I would be further along, I think.

I'm still in a major flatline, and I haven't had anything even remotely close to an erection since I quit porn.  Penis is nearly lifeless.

So depressing.  I'm have no confidence at all that this is going to work, and that I'm going to get erections back, but I'm going to stick with it as long as I need to.

Anyway, I'm officially on day 5 of no O.  Feel like I started the counter all over at zero...


23
...I'm giving it up for good.  Forever.

I am counting the days, just out of curiosity, but I don't have a 30 day goal, or a 90 day goal.

I have a one day goal:  Today.

Tomorrow I'll have a brand new one day goal.

I know for a fact I can make a one day goal....

No PMO


24
I feel no desire to look at porn, but I'm so down and depressed.

I haven't tested myself, and haven't PMO for thirty days, but the way my penis feels now, I can't imagine ever having an erection.

FLATLINE!  Started at two weeks.  The first two weeks were pretty good.  Felt good about what I was doing, then everything fell off a cliff.

I'm hanging in there though.  Might take another 30 days, might take another 30 months, but I'm not going to PMO.  Sure of that!

25
25 days without porn.  So far so good, except this terrific flatline.  No desire to look at porn what so ever though...

I've had two nights where my wife and I fooled around.  One at about a week after stopping porn, and the second at a little past three weeks.

I can't get an erection, so we didn't have intercourse, but we did a lot of other stuff.  She had a great time and had two orgasms both nights.

I was not able to orgasm from her at all.  DE and lots of difficulty.  However, I was very excited, and after all her work, it only took me a few seconds with my hand to cum.

I was not fantasizing, nor even thinking of anything else.  Just the intimacy with her, and how much I was enjoying being with her.  I love her so, so much!

Would like others thoughts and suggestions on this. 

On one hand, maybe it might be good to go no P, no M, and no O, but on the other hand, I feel like I was really emotionally close with her both nights, and it really felt like I was rewired to her.

Do you think this is a setback?  Or is it a good thing to cum with her, even though I had to finish the last little bit with my hand?

Thanks for everything.  These forums are fantastic!


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