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Messages - jay_b1985

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1
Hey, Jay!
I'm glad you were able to almost make a full seven days. Any amount of time away from pornography is good. Don't be too hard on yourself for viewing it. It's a struggle and we all know those feelings. You took the time to find this site, and to even see a therapist to help. You have the determination. You can do it, buddy!
Identifying your triggers is great. What was it that triggered today? Sharing it could allow us to offer help. One of mine is sleep deprivation, so if an urge hits I put my phone on the other side of the room and take a nap, depending on the time of day. Whatever it is, try not to let your addicted brain tempt you. Shut it down.

Thanks for your support. I just randomly come across a story on social media about a sexual encounter then I just ended up skimming some porn pages and then before you know it I ended up twice PMO! Its just another thing to be wary about next time. Nearly on day 3 now so nearly half way to 7 days already. Gotta keep going!

2
You're right jay,
We slip, we fall. But the most important is to get up and do it again.

I'm with you buddy

Thanks mate. Good to have support! If I look at it in the grand scheme of things, I have PMO’d 3 times I’m 3 weeks so actually it’s not too bad. Just got to get the consistency

3
Well nearly at day 7 and I have failed. It has been coming all day to be honest and I thought it was fine. However, I failed. I wouldn't mind but I wasn't even that aroused. I know why I failed though and I know what I need to do going forward. I am not getting too disappointed as I got to the end of day 6 nearly but its another lesson learned. Just gonna forget about it and start the clock again. I will get past this!

4
Thanks for taking the time to reply to my post guys, I really appreciate it. I'm nearly on day 5 and still no urges. To be fair I have been very busy with work and stuff so my mind has been occupied. Even tonight though I am home alone with my computer and there is zero urge. Think my sexual desire is pretty low this week anyway though. Either way, I feel I am more prepared to get past the upcoming weekend as its usually the weekends when I fail. This morning when I woke up I did have morning wood which I dont usually get. I didn't have much of a desire to use it but it was there. Hopefully with more time off PMO this will start to improve and all of the short term affects will follow. I know what my long term future looks like when I finally get over this and that is what is driving me. I won't go into all of my dreams of how I can see the future but I know it will be a much better place than now. I will keep updating this post as I progress further.

5
Ages 30-39 / Re: 31 years old story
« on: October 05, 2017, 03:21:48 PM »
I pretty much share you experiences. I am 31 and have been watching the stuff since I was 14. I have had issues for years before realising that it was PMO that was causing them. Everything from low sexual desire, inconsistent erections, loss of morning wood, the feeling like my manhood has no feeling even though I have an erection and more importantly, my mental state. I think its caused me to have anxiety and for me to feel tired at times, lethargic and just not wanting to do anything. I thought it was physical but turns out my general health is great and all my hormones etc are actually better than guys in their late teens, early 20's. Its amazing how much PMO can affect you. I am on day 5 nearly and its usually day 6 when I fall but this time I am more prepared, I know what my future looks like without P and the incentive of not only having my sex life back like it was in my teens but also decreased anxiety and that general good feeling. Keep going though, I will follow your progress as I feel we share similar experiences.

6
Hey, Jay!
Welcome to the community. You're most definitely not alone.
That 'high' you get from viewing pornography is normal. It's designed to do to make you want it repeatedly. Plus, it's extremely easy to obtain, so be cautious.
The secret to beating this is to physically and mentally remove yourself from the situation.  Avoiding a computer can be hard to do, but if you're serious about quitting then you'll do it. Your brain has been wired to crave porn and will do anything to get another 'hit'. The way to succeed is to step back and assess the situation BEFORE you sit in front of your computer. Identify the triggers that make your brain switch to porn (i.e. boredom, mindless browsing, lack of sleep, loneliness, etc) and then do something about it. Your brain is tricky so don't go into this blind, but prepared and resolute!
But stay positive about the change. Don't put yourself down if you happen to stumble. During your reboot you'll be learning how to walk on your own again. So stumbling happens, but praise your achievements.
I'm looking forward to hearing how day seven and eight went! You got this!

Thanks for your message. Avoiding a computer is difficult just because my work depends on it plus a lot of my day to day tasks require it however that is not an excuse for succumbing to weak mindedness. I think, like you say, its all about recognising the triggers. Sometimes I can just be sitting on my computer and all of a sudden I will feel aroused slightly and that feeling lower down if you know what I mean ha. I mean my libido isn't amazing in general which is one of the main symptoms I have but after a few days of rebooting it will come out of nowhere when im front of a computer. I just have to keep trying and persevering as best as possible. Im nearly onto day 3 now and had no urges, but I guess having low libido helps in that respect. However in a couple of days I will notice that increase. Just gotta keep logging into reboot nation and keep myself focused....I am going to try and update this post every day with how I am feeling to help me stay on track. Think that might help!

7
Hi everyone,

I have been struggling for years with low libido, sometimes unable to get erections even with porn (not all the time) and general low mood etc. Always thought it was hormonal or something wrong with me physically. However I came across reboot nation and no fap etc and all the symptoms matched mine from all information I read. I did try to reboot a good few months ago but keep failing. I started going to a sex therapist who deals with OCD behaviour which covers long term porn use and the wiring of the brain. She has confirmed my problem too and has challenged me to quit.

However, I keep getting to 6 days so usually from sunday to saturday then I just fail. Its like as soon as I have a day off and get a laptop on my hand I start it again. My libido generally comes back a bit after day 3 of stopping then dissapears a bit (or I think it does) then something tells me top open a new tab with porn and I get that overwhelming excitement like my libido has come back with a bang. I then keep browsing and before you know it im not really turned on anymore but still looking for something to give me that hit. Its terrible. I know people will say "oh just dont get near your laptop or whatever" but i just get drawn towards it and its like my brain says "well its been 6 days, you've done well so you've earned this" and I talk myself into it. Can anyone relate or give me advice? Many thanks.

I have a long term gf and we havent had sex in a while. She doesn't know my issue and I want to resolve it before it becomes a massive problem for us but really struggling to get this recovery off the ground!

8
Ages 30-39 / Re: My nofap journal - I'm posting my journey
« on: May 21, 2017, 04:10:59 AM »
Well, it got to day 11, I had some drinks, came home and relapsed again :(. I'm pretty angry with myself to be honest but kinda knew if I was gonna fail then it was gonna be after drinking. Really need to work on how I can get around that as when I drink I just stop thinking properly. I've started again and now nearly on day 2!

9
Ages 30-39 / Re: My nofap journal - I'm posting my journey
« on: May 18, 2017, 03:11:16 PM »
Day 10 -  I think my anxiety has improved the past few days, I feel a bit more relaxed.

I've had no morning wood past two days, or not that I know of anyway. I haven't had an urge to masturbate the past few days and kind of lost the bit of libido I had. Think I could be flatlining, which I thought a few days ago in one of my previous posts. The good thing though is Ive had no urge to watch porn at all since I started.

This is the longest I have ever abstained from MO so this is new territory for me. I really hope by day 30, that my general wellbeing has improved even more and that my libido and urges start to come back properly. Perhaps thats optimistic though but I will take one day at a time.

I am drinking tomorrow night so that will be the real test as last time I relapsed was because I came home drunk and then binged for hours. Not good! Lets see how I get on!

10
Ages 30-39 / Re: My nofap journal - day 5 so far
« on: May 16, 2017, 04:01:47 PM »
Day 8 - woke up this morning with crazy morning wood! Haven't had that sort of morning since I was about 18 lol! I'm pretty pleased with this and I hope it's a very positive sign of a small improvement. Other than that don't feel too different.

11
Ages 30-39 / Re: My nofap journal - day 5 so far
« on: May 15, 2017, 02:48:47 PM »
Day 7 - still going strong! Didn't get morning wood today and the past 24 hours I have had no urge to masturbate and literally zero libido which is strange as the first 5 days my libido was actually getting better and better. I hope its not the start of a flatline.

Other good news though is that my final endo appointment was this morning and literally about 25 blood samples came back all great. This includes testosterone which is apparently well above average for my age, oestrogen, shbg, vitamin D, liver etc. So now I deffo know that whatever is happening is not physical so I put all my eggs into one basked for PIED lol.

I will keep going with this diary as its a good motivation for me to keep going.

12
I need help please i am having problem
I was watching porn for 10 years now, i am 24 now
For the past 5 years i have been watching porn daily and masturbated twice each day.
Now i am having the following
No wet dreams,
No morning wood,
No spontaneous erections,
When watching porn i dont get fully hard with watching only sometime with watching getting hard to about 70 percent, i always need constant hand stolimulation and in many times i dont reach hundred percent hard
In addition i was put on ssri for 3 and half years but off them for a year now,
I dont know what to do, and i dont know whether rebooting will fix all these issues
Please help me, as i am currently very depressed

I reckon if you abstain from PMO you will start getting your erections back. I was in the same boat and even after a few days I was getting my proper erections back.

13
I've seen that almost all people that can't get erected even with porn took SSRI anytime in the past. Google PSSD (Post SSRI sexual disfunction)

I ended up having ED with porn and I have never taken anything including SSRI. I think for some people it can just get to the point where even with porn it doesn't work properly!

14
Ages 30-39 / My nofap journal - I'm posting my journey
« on: May 13, 2017, 01:48:32 PM »
I have suffered what I think is PIED since I was 19....I am now 31. My libido before that used to be through the roof! Back then I was lucky (or unlucky enough) to be at the age where laptops and high speed broadband were available and that was it, I was watching porn 3-4 times a day maybe even more from the age of 16. Then one day when I was 19 something happened. It was like my libido just disappeared and fapping and watching porn just wasn't fun. I started struggling to get erections on and off and when I was with real females it didn't happen full stop. I also stopped getting morning wood and my general mood was low and I started getting anxiety. It got to a point a few months ago where I had ED with porn and over the past couple of years vanilla porn just didn't do it for me. I couldn't get an erection through mental fantasies, that was the most depressing thing! Anyway, over the years I have been to see urologists, GPs, endos etc and nothing was found. I have slept with nearly 100 women in that time but most of that was either after drinking or using cialis lol.

Then I found this website....after reading up on the subject of PIED for a few weeks I decided maybe I should give it a go.

I started nofap a few weeks back and lasted 10 days with no porn and no MO...I started feeling really good but then I had a few drinks felt horny and PMO. Then the next day I was really horny, full erection and I just binged. Since then though my erections have been good and my libido has actually not been too bad. However I have decided to start again and it's now been 5 days :)

Days 1-5 so far: the past couple of mornings I have had morning wood, yesterday especially I really had the urge but it was 5.30am and I just got up and went to the gym to train so I dodged it.

My libido yesterday seemed quite high, and this morning too. I saw an image of a semi naked girl on my social media and I had that racing heart feeling, you know, the one you got when you were 16 and you were excited. I then fantasised about a girl I had sex with last year and I was so excited and I had a full erection but didn't do anything, I resisted the urge. I can't remember the last time I had that....anyway, it seems as though its a very good start and I will add to this in a few days.

Thanks everyone who gave me advice. After a decade of searching for an answer to my problem I think I may have just found it :)

15
sounds like severe case of PIED where even porn cant get you going anymore. anxiety, lacking enjoyment in life and other things you described fits the picture perfectly. you gone to doctors, checked everything so there is only one thing that can cause trouble and it is causing most of us here a lot of trouble with erections. you know the game, quit it.

you slept with nearly 100 women in 5 years, now thats some confidence on display. are you just born that way or you worked on it?

Hi Nikola,

Yeah I tried to quit last week. 5 days or so I didn't even think about it then the 6th day I was out drinking came back and my libido was high so I failed. I am trying again from tomorrow though, hopefully after a few weeks I could be OK, especially after 5 days  of quitting and my libido came back a bit. Well it was probably more 100 women in 3 years to be honest as the first two years I was useless lol. I am a very confident person especially with females, and I'm not bad looking and in good shape so guess it helps. I think I just have the gift of the talk when it comes to chatting them up lol. Although to be honest at the moment I am not really bothered, I just want to feel good again in general!

16
Just to add to the above... I don't get morning wood - that stopped when I started getting low libido etc when I was 18-19. I haven't taken any anti depressants or any drugs of that kind, I don't take recreational drugs, I am fit and in shape, I no longer smoke and I only drink once every few weeks. I also found that over time I needed more niche porn to satisfy me as the Vanilla stuff wasn't really doing it for me.

17
Hi guys,

new to this but a bit of background. I am 31 years old and have been watching porn since like 14 or so. Sex drive was always amazing and id say by about 18 thats when the internet porn started getting quicker, more accessible, I had my own laptop. I started literally pulling it to porn like 5-6 times a day. Anyway around 19 years of age or so my libido dropped a bit and became a little patchy, lost a bit of interest in it, couldn't always maintain an erection. Got tested for hormone problems, urology tested me for various other things and all normal. Then I got a gf and just couldn't do it most the time, I just felt not in the mood and couldn't get it up but then id go home and without porn manage to get it up but with no interest.

10 years on its got to a point where now, even watching porn isn't doing for me, and i am struggling with erections even on my own which is a first as even with low libido i've been able to get it up using my own mental fantasy. Since being single 5 years ago I have slept with nearly 100 women, mostly using the odd ciailis tablet but some where I have managed to perform and have been aroused without.

The past couple of months have been crap and my libido is shot, erections are struggling even on my own and I dont know what to do as physically i'm fit and healthy. i had hormone bloods taken and my testosterone is higher than most 18 year olds! I do have a bit of general anxiety so I worry a bit more than others about things in every day life and I do have mood swings and sometimes feel tired. I do lack enjoyment in life these days too.

I think even when i am not in the mood for sex I want to watch porn anyway for the sake of it which is probably the addiction and this can lead to weaker erections and dull orgasms.

Anyway, I have come across this and I seem to relate to a lot of the symptoms the guys have on here. I think the difference is though, not even porn is doing it for me anymore, however could my issue still be PIED? Has anyone experienced the same?


Sorry for the long post but any input would be appreciated :)

Thanks

18
My issue started about your age too and I even had low libido for porn once I noticed something was wrong, never mind women. is that similar with you?

19
Hi guys,

new to this but a bit of background. I am 30 years old and have been watching porn since like 14 or so. Sex drive was always amazing and id say by about 18 thats when the internet porn started getting quicker, more accessible, I had my own laptop. I started literally pulling it to porn like 5-6 times a day. Anyway around 19 years of age or so my libido dropped a bit and became a little patchy, lost a bit of interest in it, couldn't always maintain an erection. Got tested for hormone problems, urology tested me for various other things and all normal. Then I got a gf and just couldn't do it most the time, I just felt not in the mood and couldn't get it up but then id go home and without porn manage to get it up but with no interest.

10 years on its got to a point where now, even watching porn isn't doing for me, and i am struggling with erections even on my own which is a first as even with low libido i've been able to get it up using my own mental fantasy. Since being single 5 years ago I have slept with nearly 100 women, mostly using the odd ciailis tablet but some where I have managed to perform and have been aroused without.

The past couple of months have been crap and my libido is shot, erections are struggling even on my own and I dont know what to do as physically i'm fit and healthy. i had hormone bloods taken and my testosterone is higher than most 18 year olds! I do have a bit of general anxiety so I worry a bit more than others about things in every day life and I do have mood swings and sometimes feel tired. I do lack enjoyment in life these days too.

I think even when i am not in the mood for sex I want to watch porn anyway for the sake of it which is probably the addiction and this can lead to weaker erections and dull orgasms.

Anyway, I have come across this and I seem to relate to a lot of the symptoms the guys have on here. I think the difference is though, not even porn is doing it for me anymore, however could my issue still be PIED? Has anyone experienced the same? I have give it up past couple of days with the hope to refrain for a few months just to try but i am really running out of answers and it's getting to me!


Sorry for the long post but any input would be appreciated :)

Thanks

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