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Messages - Androg

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1
Success Stories / Re: trust can rebuild and forgiveness is possible
« on: January 13, 2017, 08:30:13 PM »
Recovered addicts can be amazing, wise, humble, loving mates. Well done having a heart big enough to make it through such a difficult time.

Not sure if you would find this useful: http://www.reuniting.info/lazy_way_to_stay_in_love

All the best!

2
Success Stories / Re: First time having sex in a year
« on: November 22, 2016, 01:17:23 PM »
I'm confused. Did you quit because of sexual dysfunctions, or did they only show up when you flatlined during recovery? How old are you? Any other noticeable benefits since quitting?

3
Sad story, brilliantly told. Sorry for what you and Rachel went through. How old are you?

It's sad that humanity doesn't realize how important careful management of sexual energy is in terms of our perceptions and priorities.

Hats off to you sister for being a well informed therapist, rather than a crackpot like many "sex therapists" today who are making their careers by ignoring the solid science to promote the schlock "science" that the mainstream journalists are purveying for the most part. So many young men and their partners are suffering needlessly.

Thanks for telling your story.

4
Success Stories / Re: Becoming the best version of myself - 1
« on: November 21, 2016, 11:21:37 PM »
You  aren't alone. Happens to most guys. It's hard to accept that it's really the porn, with the mainstream press and even some crackpot scientists lying to you. You might like this page: http://yourbrainonporn.com/what-is-it-like-to-experiment-with-porn-after-recovery

How old are you? What benefits did you see after you quit? Did you have any sexual dysfunctions when you decided to quit?

6
Porn Addiction / Re: The fear of porn's negaive effects
« on: October 31, 2016, 12:58:11 PM »
Emerald Blue, your post makes me think of this recent talk by Gail Dines to a large conference of pediatricians. [WARNING:  may be triggering for some]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ma70AlG2mDY

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Porn Addiction / Re: The fear of porn's negaive effects
« on: October 31, 2016, 10:44:18 AM »
The largest porn giant, Mindgeek (which owns 9 of the 15 largest free porn hubs), is the porn producer/distributor with the deepest pockets and the greatest interest in having people continue to believe porn is harmless. They are the ones pandering the free porn, knowing that kids (as well as adults) are viewing their vids...a lot. They are the ones who make money from every click, due to ad revenues.

Also, keep in mind that the sexual enhancement drug makers never before had customers under 40. In less than a decade, they now have billions of dollars worth of sales from young men...thanks to streaming porn on tube sites causing severe sexual dysfunctions.

Are we up against some Very Big and Unethical $$$$ when it comes to efforts to suppress this message in every way possible?

8
Porn Addiction / Re: Reboot turning weird
« on: August 20, 2016, 06:58:17 PM »
Can you find a therapist to help you at this site? http://www.new.sash.net/

It's not unusual for cravings and weird fantasies to get stronger at first, during a reboot. But giving into them makes them worse. They will settle down as you get your brain back into balance. The things that help the most are exercise, meditation, time in nature, socializing, staying offline, and beneficial stressors like cold showers.

Meanwhile, when you have cravings, try these things:

•   Urinate, which can reduce the urges. (Drink a lot of water if you need to.)
•   Splash cold water on your junk.
•   While you release your breath slowly contract your butt/hamstrings as hard as you can so that you feel like you're lifting up and keep it like that until you can't anymore and release it slowly.
•   Hold your breath for 30 seconds.
•   Avoid fantasizing.
•   As a single movement, practice contracting and pulling upward the entire floor of your pelvis, including the anus, perineum, and genitals. It should feel like you are trying to stop yourself from going to the bathroom. You can practice this in sets of 15 or 20 contractions, holding them as long as you can. Kills boners.

9
Here's an interesting take on animal masturbation: http://yourbrainonporn.com/masturbation-fantasy-and-captivity

10
Congratulations on your recovery. It's great you found the information here helpful.

Streaming internet porn is a new phenomenon and it will take time for the medical/scientific professions to catch up.

11
Great to hear of your progress. I'm curious. Did you cut back on porn use while in relationships in the past? Maybe that's why things would eventually get better.

It's interesting that you continued to masturbate to fantasy. But you said when you did the PIED test, you *couldn't* masturbate to fantasy. Did you take a short timeout from masturbation (+ avoiding porn) at first when you started this recovery?

12
Congratulations. How old are you? How long were you aware of the problem?

13
Porn Addiction / Re: Having "unavoidable" trigger issue. Any advice?
« on: January 21, 2016, 11:25:32 AM »
Avoiding fantasizing is really helpful during a reboot. Sounds like that might help with this too. Have a look at this link: http://www.yourbrainonporn.com/what-about-fantasizing-during-reboot

14
Ages 30-39 / Re: Tostadora: 4 years working on it
« on: December 24, 2015, 12:55:15 PM »
Congratulations. That's a really inspiring post. You are a courageous man.

15
Success Stories / Re: Day 89 and I feel like a new man
« on: December 19, 2015, 07:41:56 PM »
Congratulations! Suggestion: if you do masturbate, no porn: http://yourbrainonporn.com/how-do-i-masturbate-without-porn It's really easy to slip backward in times of stress. As you age, your brain gets harder to re-train.

Word to the wise: http://yourbrainonporn.com/what-is-it-like-to-experiment-with-porn-after-recovery

16
Success Stories / Re: CURED all of my Sexual Dysfunctions
« on: November 19, 2015, 07:28:41 PM »
Bravo. How old are you?

17
Porn Addiction / Re: Let Go Of a Fetish PART TWO
« on: October 19, 2015, 02:45:58 PM »
http://www.yourbrainonporn.com/are-sexual-tastes-immutable

If you want to re-train your brain, you need to be as consistent as possible. Indefinitely.

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Porn Addiction / Re: Let Go Of a Fetish PART TWO
« on: October 18, 2015, 08:51:46 PM »
Thanks for sharing your story and advice. How long have you been not using your fetish?

19
This is a HUGE problem for your generation. You really have to quit porn completely if you want to have normal sex. This is happening to many guys.

If you do masturbate, no P: http://yourbrainonporn.com/how-do-i-masturbate-without-porn

Motivation: http://www.yourbrainonporn.com/research-confirms-enormous-rise-youthful-ed As you age, your brain gets harder to re-train.

20
Porn Induced Erectile Dysfunction/Delayed Ejaculation / Re: Hope
« on: August 29, 2015, 08:33:27 PM »
Do you know about the chaser? http://yourbrainonporn.com/what-chaser

21
Porn Addiction / Re: The Genesis of Porn Addiction
« on: May 14, 2015, 12:09:09 PM »
Good explanation and visuals. You're a natural professor!

23
Porn Addiction / Re: Porn research Holland, Europe
« on: May 04, 2015, 03:58:37 PM »
Sounds like useful research. Can you post a different link to this study?

Meerkerk et al. , 2011 (http://www.ivo.nl/download.php?file=/UserFiles/File/Publicaties/2011-09%20De%20Opwinding%20voorbij.pdf)  A password is needed to access it.

24
That article mixes up two studies. But it gets the main point across.

The first study, linked to in the article, just tried to manipulate male rats to enjoy the company of a (sexually experienced) male through using a dopamine agonist to condition a preference. Normally males don't like to hang out together.

It worked...on males. Female rats couldn't be conditioned to do this (demonstrate socio-sexual preference with a same sex rat).

Also, interestingly, the conditioning in the males was gone 45 days later. In other words, without reinforcement, it faded. It was more like a porn fetish than an actual sexual orientation.

STUDY:
"Same-sex cohabitation under the effects of quinpirole induces a conditioned socio-sexual partner preference in males, but not in female rats" http://www.researchgate.net/publication/51248698_Same-sex_cohabitation_under_the_effects_of_quinpirole_induces_a_conditioned_socio-sexual_partner_preference_in_males_but_not_in_female_rats

The second, more recent study, which is described in the article, but not linked to, is one where the conditioned males were then offered the option of a receptive female and preferred the male.

STUDY:
"Conditioned same-sex partner preference in male rats is facilitated by oxytocin and dopamine: Effect on sexually dimorphic brain nuclei" http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/25601575

The takeaway is that male sexuality is highly conditionable, and there are probably good evolutionary reasons for this. But those reasons assume a very different sexual environment than the endless novelty of internet porn. Now, such "easy conditionability" becomes a liability for some males, who end up hooked on screens, fetishes and watching others have sex - instead of real partners.

Fortunately, brains are plastic, and can be retrained.

25
Porn Induced Erectile Dysfunction/Delayed Ejaculation / Re: Not good
« on: April 05, 2015, 06:49:08 PM »
Sometimes improvement isn't linear. That is, after you quit, your libido may be up and down for a bit before you're fully healed. That's temporary, and a natural part of the healing. Also, don't try to force your performance with your GF. Give her this: http://yourbrainonporn.com/boyfriend-quitting-porn-5-tips

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