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Messages - vajazzv

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Ages 40 and up / Re: When I have grandkids, I'll have nothing to hide!
« on: September 07, 2015, 11:28:05 AM »
Bob,
Thank you for the post.   I was feeling anxious this morning....today makes six days and I really am fighting urges....your post helped me to say no - just for today! 
congrats on 125 days!!!

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Ages 40 and up / Re: When I have grandkids, I'll have nothing to hide!
« on: September 05, 2015, 02:14:22 PM »
Made it over two very regular pmo hurdles......last night, when my wife goes to bed earlier than I do, a traditional time for me to launch into a 90 minute pmo fest.  Nope!   finished the Dr. Who episode I was watching and then went to bed!

This morning, when she takes her post-hike shower, I trigger.....you've got 20 minutes to pmo......nope again!

One accomplishment at a time and I'll get there!

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Ages 40 and up / Re: When I have grandkids, I'll have nothing to hide!
« on: September 04, 2015, 10:22:34 PM »
Today was a very good day.  I went to an my AA home group.  Two members of SAA attend this meeting regularly....it was good to see them.
I made an ambitious to do list today, I am a newly retired teacher and want to have good days as my wife goes back to work and I don't.
I also know how easy it would be to pmo, to spend hours searching candid photos and videos.
So today, I got a lot accomplished.   I "appreciated" the three hot girls at the gym while I was working out but didn't let that trigger a p or a pmo.

My accountability buddy/friend from SAA shared a link to his reboot story- I think he is a brave man.
I need to share my story......I will do that next week.

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Ages 40 and up / Re: When I have grandkids, I'll have nothing to hide!
« on: September 04, 2015, 09:47:28 PM »
Thank you for your reply notgivinup!
I cleaned up my files today and emptied a flash drive of candid videos.
Next week, I need to dig through a closet and find an external hard drive and delete those files.

Did a lot of work in my man cave today (where our desktop computer is).  When i finish a project, my reward sense always says....time for pmo.
I didn't go there today, I considered it and knew that just for today, I don't need ot do it.

Phone check in with my accountability buddy and some emails swapped.
Good day!
Day 4 is going to feel good- out for a hike and attending a college football game!

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Ages 40 and up / Re: When I have grandkids, I'll have nothing to hide!
« on: September 02, 2015, 10:42:54 AM »
I guess this is the way to continue journal entries?   The second line of my first post on through the end was written at 8:40am on sept 2.

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Ages 40 and up / When I have grandkids, I'll have nothing to hide!
« on: September 01, 2015, 09:47:14 PM »

This is vajazzv and I am excited and nervous to begin this journey/journal.
I set up my counter this morning!  It marks 24 hours since my last PMO.
I have been attending SAA meetings and met a buddy and we made a commitment to support each other.
I have always felt like I could control my porn usage, but with my addicitve personality (4 1/2 years sober in AA) and diagnosed ADD, who am I kidding!?
At my buddy's urging, I came to rebootnation and what I have known in my gut, was re-confirmed.  Why not go for it?
It is so much more rewarding to read, exercise and take care of myself than to view porn and the slippery slope material (for me it is candid photos and videos).
I am going to the gym and then home to remove some saved candid videos from a flash drive - and clean my hard drive (does anyone else find it a cruel ironic pun that it is a "hard" drive?)
again, thanks to all who make rebootnatioin happen and support to all who are on the journey.

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