Reboot Nation

Journals => Ages 40 and up => Topic started by: Gabe Deem on April 21, 2014, 11:55:15 PM

Title: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: Gabe Deem on April 21, 2014, 11:55:15 PM
**Accountability Partner Request Thread**

What is an "accountability partner?" = Accountability partners are pairs who hold each other responsible for their sexual habits - someone who commits to supporting and following you along the process of rebooting.

Why get an accountability partner? A few reasons...

1) As the forum grows it will be hard to keep track of everyone's journals. If you are busy, having a partner will keep things fast and simple. The days you have more time, you can venture off into other journals of course, but if you have a partner you can easily give consistent support and help each other, without becoming overwhelmed by numerous entries.

2) Giving/receiving support during the reboot process is highly beneficial, and if you can consistently do so that is even better. Knowing there is someone who is in this reboot process with you can be very calming and soothing. Knowing you are not alone is very helpful, and it is the truth.

3) You will have someone to relate to. Someone who understands some, if not most, of what you describe during your reboot, and who will be trucking along Recovery Road with you, cheering you on when times are bad, and celebrating with you when positive steps are taken.


1) Partners will post IN EACH OTHER'S JOURNAL, or if needed through private messages. This is very important, as your reboot account will remain all in one place, and the forum will not be broken down further into smaller, not as active sections. Ask for a partner in this thread, then once you have one, follow each other's journals and post there!

2) The main forum rules still apply in accountability partner posts. We will be positive and supportive and not push anything on each other. To review the rules go here: *FORUM RULES* (

3) You can have more than one accountability partner, but PLEASE avoid doing this unless you are sure you have enough time to be of help to multiple people. The last thing a rebooter needs is a partner quitting on them halfway through their reboot and leaving them feeling abandoned. However, if a situation comes up where you no longer can be a partner (we all know life happens), please let your partner know so they can come back to this thread and request another partner!

4) If your partner relapses, do NOT shame or criticize. This will do no good. Instead offer advice or a different perspective of looking at the situation. Tough love is all right, a personal attack is not. If you have offered all the advice you can give and they keep slipping, you don't have to say anything, just be there for support and reassure them that they can in fact, recover, as many others have before them.

5) Encourage each other to learn as much as possible about this addiction. When you learn something new on this site or YBOP, share it with your partner. The more you know, the better the advice you can give your accountability partner. The better understanding you have of how porn can re-wire and actually numb your brain, hopefully the less desirable porn will become (as happened for me). Then you can come up with a plan of action. In my experience, knowledge is power for rebooters.

6) Just post a comment with a few things about your situation/life/reboot status and request a partner. But first go through earlier comments and see if anyone needs one.

7) After you get a partner please "modify/update" your request post at the top saying you now have a partner. This will save people time who are searching for a partner.

Keep it simple. We are ALL in this together.

Thanks and I hope the best for everyone,

Much love,
Reboot Nation!
Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: Mojo on May 08, 2014, 07:53:43 AM
I am 50 years old and have been using pornography and masturbation since my early teens.  I have been married for almost 20 years although for over 1/2 that time my wife an I have not had sex.  I have been trying to quit for PMO for several months and have made it a couple of weeks before relapsing.  I am here looking for someone in a similar situation looking for an accountability partner.
Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: dadsprimalscream on May 12, 2014, 01:16:55 PM
I am just revisiting this site after a long hiatus. I never really participated much but I first became aware of this concept over a year ago. Deep down I've always suspected that my porn use was at the center of my life struggles. At least it hasn't been making anything better.

So, I am prepared to let it go ....and seriously.  I think I need an accountability partner to give me the edge I need.

I am a 49 year old, divorced, gay father of 4. I come from a rather strict religious background so I've had large periods of time in my life when I haven't viewed porn or even masturbated. Now that I no longer subscribe to the same beliefs, it is all "morally" OK so I've kind of been on a binge. I want to stop porn because I believe it's the wise thing to do for me right now, not because I believe it's morally sinful.
Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: philkar41 on May 27, 2014, 04:06:01 PM

I am new here but like what the forum stands for.  I consider myself the casual porn user but really hate the feeling after . Further with more research into the topic  I am realizing that continued use only encourages women abuse as that creates a market for porn, and from the articles here harms my brain

I am looking for an accountability  partner to help me flush this thing off my system as I start my journey


Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: thenyteowl on June 05, 2014, 11:11:38 AM
I'm looking for an accountability partner....

....hey everyone. I'm someone that found this site in the past but didn't use it. I was successful in abstaining for 90 days, then relapsed. This time I'd like to take use of the forum and get support / be support for others going through the same journey. If you are interested just reply, or write to me in my journal. Good luck to all.
Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: savingmysoul on June 20, 2014, 11:02:07 AM
I am looking for an accountability partner -

I am 45, married to an incredible woman with two great kids.  I am 171 days free from P & M, a PIED sufferer (but improving).  I looking to have someone i can reach out to should the need arise, to check-in with, and to be there if needed.

Please feel free to post in my journal - "SMS", or send me a private message.

Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: Philonous on July 17, 2014, 07:31:34 PM
I too need an accountability partner. I'm a married man in my 50's. My present marriage is my second; we've been married only two years. I'm trying to get free of porn, but there are problems in the marriage right now, and at work. Predictably, I've turned to porn for pleasure, and then felt the pain immediately afterward. I'm a goddam mess.
Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: Putz on August 10, 2014, 11:02:32 PM
Hi, I'm new around here but feel I need help and someone to check in with.  Any suggestions or thoughts would be welcome and appreciated...
Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: Pheonix on September 08, 2014, 07:51:11 AM

I am a 42 year old porn and sex addict. I am currently on day 6 of my recovery. I have stopped several times before and always relapsed. I am here to make sure this is recovery for good this time. I am seeking an accountability partner. I will be starting my journal soon.

A little about me: I am married (18 years) and have been addicted to porn in some fashion since I was probably 12. I have been using porn almost every day since then, starting with old school porn of course! When I got out of college and started using the internet regularly, things greatly accelerated. My porn addiction lead to cheating with men and women, and was caught twice (last time was a year ago). I am still with my wife and I want to make sure that this problem never reoccurs. Please let me know if you would like to be my accountability partner.

UPDATE 9/8: Found a partner! Thanks :-)
Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: tom4newlife on September 20, 2014, 12:10:34 AM
I would like an accountability partner. I could use a lot of day-to-day contact right now. I've been sober since July16,2014 and attending SA and another men's group. Going through more withdrawal symptoms now and just need some encouragement.
Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: Nicksam1 on November 16, 2014, 04:47:52 PM
I am a 47-year-old man who began using porn as soon as masturbation became possible. I have never ejaculated with someone else in the room. I feel like a freak even though I know that I am not. I have not masturbated or even returned to porn (unless glancing at Kim Kardashian's wine glass counts) since I really started this and I seek. My largest anxieties, including depression, come from non-performance of sex. I seek an accountability partner to help me to understand how to break the conditioning I have imposed upon myself.
Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: tohellwiththedevil on January 08, 2015, 05:15:54 PM
I'm in desperate need of an accountibity partner. I'm 45 years old With a great family. I've been an addict for practically 36 years and trying to do the best I can in dealing with my demons. I've completed 12 step with celebrate recovery and I want to get rid of all my hang ups. What started with magazines moved to the internet. Ive almost lost my family over cheating on my wife.If there is somebody that can answer my call please contact me. If I can help anyone out there please drop me a line. God bless and please know there is strength in numbers.
Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: MrEd on January 13, 2015, 08:26:28 AM
I'm looking for an accountability partner....

I need help, I'm sick and I want to recover. I have received valuable advice which Ive ignored and now I'm at the very bottom of despair.

I feel like I cant escape, like life is passing me by. 46 years old and career destroyed because of porn addiction. I need to spend my time in front of PC looking at sex or I feel I will die.

Time now to make a stand but I cant do it alone, could someone partner me please?


Mr Ed
Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: ready2go on January 17, 2015, 07:04:39 PM
Here is my request for an accountability partner.  I promise not to be judgmental but to be a supportive resource.  Since I'm just getting started, my commitment is exceptionally high.  My guess as to how long that will last is about three days, and then I'll be needing some help and support.  Hope you're out there! 
Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: Rockit on March 03, 2015, 09:54:16 PM
EDITED (Wrong forum)
Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: Icandothis on March 23, 2015, 03:25:45 PM
I'm really at the spot where I need an accountability partner.  Just jumped off the wagon after logging more than 200+ days of freedom from porn.  It's been a tough month.  Thought I could run this race on my own but on my own I am left to my own vises.  Oh, I'm 53 yrs old, married and have struggled with PMO since jr high.  Thank you in advance.
Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: Heroic on May 05, 2015, 07:24:36 AM
I would like an accountability partner. I'm 49, married, 3 kids and have struggled with PMO for 20+ years. I'm reading YBOP and it's opening my eyes profoundly. I'm not judgmental and would be honored to journey with someone else in this. My commitment is extremely high. Hope to find someone here!
Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: newbeginnings on July 24, 2015, 05:36:42 AM
Hey people,

Yeah, cant write much right now as got a lot on. We are all here as we recognise the damaging effects artificial sexual stimulation does to us. For me it was less porn and more chatting to people on sex sites, cybering etc. But the background of porn on such sites sure was toxic as well.

I am three days into my commitment to leave this behind. Its really affected the last two years of my studies, motivation, memory etc. Also, I have a lovely gf, and I am sick of feeling the guilt of emotionally betraying her and also the stupid bullshit crap my mind comes up to justify my behaviours. It was bad, i felt pretty locked in and compulsive acting out. I knew it made me feel terrible, physically, emotionally and spiritually, and yet could not stop. Also I have 2 kids from a previous marriage, who are wonderful, 16 and 18. And I want to be the best dad to them, and an inspiration to them.

Even after 3 days I feel a lot better. I am looking for an accountability partner to share this journey with and gain and give support and wisdom when needed.

Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: parex on July 25, 2015, 02:56:35 AM
Hi..I am 21 year old and I this is my first day of rebooing ..I need  accountability partner ...
Title: Looking for a Accountability Partner.
Post by: BCB on December 17, 2015, 09:53:16 PM
Hi everyone, I am looking  for an accountability partner for this to keep in contact with on a regular basis. I can be very positive and supportive. Looking for the same from a AP. I am 46 yo. I am sick and tired of being sick and tired. Let's overcome this hurdle.  A better life awaits. Look forward to hearing your response. Thank you.
Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: crispxity on February 17, 2016, 01:45:14 PM
41 years old and looking for help...  I have been on this road for so long it sometimes seems like I will never overcome.  I have some insight and still some fight left in me but it would be nice to lean on someone else for a change.  I check my email daily and will be available to anyone else who is looking to move on to a better life once and for all.  Thanks
Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: Bear46 on March 04, 2016, 12:10:17 PM
Hi 46 male addicted to porn and dont know how to get it under control and need to before it destroys
My marriage any advice or basically anything else will be very helpful
Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: flyboy97222 on March 28, 2016, 12:11:49 PM
Looking for an acountability partner-

44 married man, an amazing wife and 2 wonderful children.
Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: RecoveryJunkie on May 08, 2016, 05:21:35 AM
I'm looking for AP, been hardlining off PMO for just over a month. I'm over 40 and diabetic but have done vascular testing and the doc says circulation is good so here I find myself looking for answers. I'm Straight, have a new gf who I've talked to about PMO issues. She is supportive. I'm Not that experienced when it comes to forums but I've been journaling on here roughly every day or so. The struggle is real although I haven't and don't want to watch P anymore. Inbox me if you think we could help each other.
Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: mymensgroup717 on May 23, 2016, 03:16:25 PM
I think accountability is an important step in recovery. However, it can't just be focused on the behavior alone. We have to get to what is underlying the behavior. Masturbating and porn is just a symptom of an underlying problem. It's like having a cold and all you do is focus on what type of tissues to buy for your runny nose or what kind of cough drops to get. It's focusing on a remedy for the symptoms and not getting at fixing the root issue which is the cold. Creating a safe environment for accountability to explore that is definitely critical. That being said, it’s also important to make sure that accountability questions asked get to heart level matters. Guys have to feel safe and have a level of trust established in order to go to that level though. I see three main types of accountability. Cop accountability where the cop takes a “gotcha!” legalistic approach to the person being held accountable. There is also coach accountability where the coach tries to be very positive and encouraging and finally there is cardiac accountability where the person gets to heart level issues and matters with the person being held accountable. This gets at the underlying things that manifest with symptoms of acting out (porn, masturbation, affairs, etc.) The key with accountability is not just focusing on the symptoms which is how the person acted out (cop and coach) but to get to the underlying root issues or causes that were behind the acting out (cardiac).
Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: Porn2Bmild on May 23, 2016, 10:47:59 PM
I'm not exactly how this is supposed to work, but I am looking for an AP.  About me, I am an openly gay 43 year-old man, just so you guys know where I'm coming from.  Thanks.
Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: Franklinj6 on May 31, 2016, 10:12:54 PM
Good luck.
Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: carlson on June 01, 2016, 08:56:18 AM
I'm 51 years old and 43 days into my hard reboot.  After eight years of addiction to free porn on the Internet, I have trashed my life and my relationship to my beautiful wife and daughter.  I am fighting to regain my soul, my self, and my love.  Despite some symptoms (headaches, mood swings/spikes, sleeplessness), the process of abstaining has been good - with no desire to go back. 

Want to keep it that way - and through SA meetings, I've heard stories of successful reboots falling apart when stress or depression works its way through.  I have not found a sponsor yet, and it seems to me that an accountability partner might be more in line with what could help me - not just to stay on track, but to focus on helping someone else do the same.  Porn addiction for me has been a kind of toxic narcissism - I want to focus on other people and of being some use in the world after taking so much away from it.

I look forward to meeting and working with a partner on this recovery.
Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: Porn2Bmild on June 02, 2016, 02:04:30 PM
^ So I just read your journal, P2Bm, and realize that we're basically starting up at the same time. Coming from different places. Not so radically different as to not find some common humanity. (Your list on what you ended up watching - and how mortified you felt by this list - could match mine for remorse, believe me. I mean, how's that happen?) If you wanna read through my journal and do this accountability partner thing, I'd be open. Also new to this, somewhat confused, but enthusiastic for some fixin'! If you've got other options or don't see the mesh, also good; still cheering you on, bud.


Fj6, thanks for taking the time to reply.  I have an AP now, but we're all in this together.  Hopefully, you can find an AP soon.  I'm telling you, having one makes a difference.

I relapsed twice since I joined mid-May, but now that I have an AP, he's kept me from PMO'ing (and even MO'ing) twice within as many days now. I'm determined to get through these next 3 months via the Hard 90 route.

Stay positive and strong, my brother!  We will conquer this!
Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: Brokenbutredeemed on June 04, 2016, 10:12:47 AM
I am a 53 year old married male, father of two, seeking an accountability partner. 

Today, marks seven weeks that I have been PMO free and I want to keep it that way.
Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: Feeble mindLO on July 12, 2016, 07:10:14 PM
I am 62 years old, masturbating from the age of 5, sexually molested by a male OR tec. Would like an accountability partner that is Christian, just believe that we would be on the same page. Married for 37 years, she's a good woman, and she knows of the porn. Other programs are outside my ranch. As I am not the only one who needs help with little to work with. On good days it mite be 7 to 10 days return to porn, but it keeps coming back. Was a part of this form 6 months ago and pride ran me off. Not this time. Would like to connect with two others, for that makes for a three cord accord that not easy to break.
Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: imnipper on July 14, 2016, 02:07:52 AM
I've started my reboot and I am committed to my recovery.  I have been following some journals and participating in others and my own recovery but it would be nice to have a dedicated accountability partner.  I use support where I can find it but I am ultimately responsible for my own reboot.

I have found that I have been connecting with men of across the board in this shared community but I relate on other life experiences as:

-a gay man
-a secular Jew (no God here)
-a WeHo or gay ghetto/boystown resident
-someone whose sexual awakening occurred in or around the early 1980's as AIDS was taking root

If you are new here and looking for someone that will challenge you in your recovery and you are up to the challenge, please reach out!
Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: joemaloney12 on July 16, 2016, 05:31:25 AM
Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: Evivrus on September 05, 2016, 11:00:19 AM
 mid 50's, great wife and family, married 29 years, enjoy fair health and am successful in my career.  I've been addicted to porn my whole life. Progressed last year to acting out, with men.  Porn and sex has dominated my life since I was 13. All consuming.

More of my story on my journal page.

Looking for someone around my age to be accountable with.

Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: FTL on September 21, 2016, 04:47:34 AM
Hello, i'm looking for an accountability partner.
I'm 40 years old, married, and new at rebooting
I am a christian, but ill keep my beliefs to myself

Stay strong
Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: Yellowbrain on November 15, 2016, 03:05:17 PM

New here. I'm 54, married with 2 young kids. I've been addicted to porn as long as I can remember. Did therapy etc., but really need accountability to someone in the same boat.

Spiritual, but not religious.

Porn is threatening to destroy my life, but I'm confident I can move through this.

Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: Penitent on December 14, 2016, 04:22:22 PM
I am 50 years old. I had been a constant user of all forms of (non-paid) pornography for years. My wife discovered this last spring and initiated a divorce. She forgave me, and I foolishly thought that I had the wherewithal to simply abandon decades of conditioning. I backslid beginning about three weeks ago. I was discovered. My wife now wavers between telling me that she will only stay around until the children have finished high school and telling me she loves me. I know that I don't even deserve for her to stay around another day. I do not know how an accountability partner works, but I am willing to try it. To make matters more difficult, my employer has changed their HRA policies so that I can no longer use my card to directly pay the coach/counselor I had just started using, beginning January 1. Given what that costs, I may be adrift without professional assistance.

Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: papa on February 28, 2017, 11:55:23 AM
 Looking for an accountability partner. 
I am 43 years old, I am married for the past 11 years and have been struggling with porn for probably 35 years.   I haven't used porn in a few weeks, but now that I have been reading this website I have understood that by me going on YouTube and Facebook and kind of trying to see women is just as bad.  I quit in July 2016 and during that time I would perv on Facebook and YouTube etc. and then finally relapse in December 2016.  From then until now I would continue doing this perving on YouTube etc.   Now from what I've read here I realize that I need to rewire my brain and quit it all and all, no YouTube/Facebook perving.

 I have had an affair on my wife and was caught, I am really lucky that she is staying with me and working it out.  I believe that the affair occurred partially because of porn. What I am unsure of is how to do this reboot while I am married, obviously I am sexually attracted to my wife, what do I do not give her any sexual attention at all during the 90 days?
 How do I deal with the sexual temptation of touching my wife, even though we are not having any sex, she is not ready due to the affair 
Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: Blaze01 on August 31, 2017, 06:00:05 PM
47 year old newbie here on the forum. I'm on day 5 and have done fairly well in my reboot, but I'm not gonna get too over confident with it. I realize I'm subject to slip at anytime. I need an accountability partner to help me through this. Please if anyone can commit to this send me a message. Thanks you, Blaze
Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: getagrip on October 26, 2017, 05:57:52 PM
I'm a 67-year old guy with a relatively new porn and P.I.E.D. problem. I didn't start watching heavily until my divorce about two years ago. When I lost my "adult supervision" and got my own place, it was just way too easy to go on my computer and PMO for hours and hours at a time, sometimes not getting to bed until 5 a.m. or so, and then having to call in sick for work. I had an accountability partner until about six months ago, and our relationship was very helpful to both of us. But he finished his reboot and moved on, totally understandable. Since I've been without an accountability partner all summer, I've slipped back into my unhealthy habits. I would welcome anyone of any age to p.m. me and see if we can help each other out.

Thanks very much.
Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: alongtheriver on October 30, 2017, 11:11:22 PM
I just posted my intro and am definitely looking for an accountability partner. I could really use some help getting this under control.
Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: papa on November 02, 2017, 07:36:26 AM
 Hey man I am also looking for an accountability partner, if you want to send me a private message we can take it from there let me know  or if anyone else is interested in an accountability partner send me a private message

I just posted my intro and am definitely looking for an accountability partner. I could really use some help getting this under control.
Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: sunshine_rec0rder on November 07, 2017, 04:36:01 AM
Hi Everyone,

I'm looking to team up with an accountability partner to support eachother. In 2015 I recognised that I have an addiction. I have made significant progress since then but finding an accountability partner is the next stage. You can read about my journey here:

What I would expect from an accountability partner:

1. Take over admin on my filtering softwares. This is just to ensure I don't change the passwords.

2. Also, if I could ad them as my accountability partner on my Fortify program so they can see my 'battle tracker' i.e see my progress.

3. Communicate with eachother on a weekly basis to see how we are getting along (if you need more often then weekly that's fine, we can figure out what suits us best). 

If you would like to team up with me please PM me and say a little about your journey so far.


UPDATE: I opened up to a close friend about my recovery and he is now my accountability partner. I am not looking for another accountability partner anymore.
Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: seekinghelp on January 04, 2018, 09:29:08 AM
I am a 61 year old who is just starting my re-boot. I just came to grips with this about a week ago so feel overwhelmed by most of it. I think it might be helpful to have a friend here to help keep me honest.
Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: 5Dawgs on February 23, 2018, 12:44:15 PM
Hi.  I'm new to the site.  I'm a few weeks shy of 49 years old, and I've been addicted since I was about 20.  Been struggling to beat it by myself with ups and downs but no long term success.  I've been experiencing the porn-induced ED for several years and have to take viagra to be with my wife.  She knows nothing of my addiction.  It's the only thing I've ever hidden from her in the 30 years we've been together.  I'm at the end of my rope, and I'm hoping I can finally overcome this with the help of a community like this one.  If there is anyone looking for an accountability partner, I would welcome the opportunity.  I've finally come to the conclusion that I am never going to beat this on my own. 
Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: JedClampett on April 20, 2018, 10:36:15 PM

I would be willing to be your Accountability Partner.

I am a 60 year old virgin with an addiction to PMO.  I also have a couple mild disabilities but I am a good
athlete.  It was the disabilities that kept me from hooking up fulltime with a lady.

I am 100% Heterosexual though!!!
Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: NoFear on June 29, 2018, 09:24:43 PM
Looking for an accountability partner. I'm 66 and using porn since I was 14.  Have been in SA in the past and therapy several years ago. Had some success, but have relapsed. Back in therapy to work on underlying issues as well as stopping, but I want to work with someone who's also going through what I am going through. I'm married and told my wife about this, and have her support, but I'm not comfortable accounting to her. If you are available, message me. Thanks.
Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: dlansky on September 12, 2018, 05:03:45 PM
I would be interested in finding an accountability partner -- preferably someone who plans to incorporate their faith into their recovery. I am a 46yo Catholic, married, father of four.
Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: Jethro on December 03, 2018, 04:06:37 AM
Hi, I'm looking for an AP to help,and be helpful to,in my struggle to reboot successfully,and sustain my recovery as I have failed on many occasions over the years.I have watched porn every day,but I am on day two of being away from porn. It isn't easy and I need help with the withdrawals,(and believe me they are bad!).I also have engaged in cyber sex, with both sexes,although I enjoyed it at the time,it wasn't long before the guilt and shame set in. My porn addiction has grown worse over time,and I find that I have to watch more and more "warped and darker",subject matter to achieve the same stimulation. If you are looking for an AP,or think that you could help me, then contact me either by reply, PM, or email me. Thank you.
Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: John F on December 13, 2018, 01:30:17 PM
I am new to this forum, but I have been involved with "Men's work" through an international organization for almost 20 years. I meet with a group of men, and we practice accountability, and hold each other accountable when neccessary........SO, I know how having an accountability support system works.
     That being said, I would really appreciate having an accountability partner, and being one for some one who is also interested for the right reasons. How do I do this?
Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: Pauljoh on April 21, 2019, 03:40:00 PM

I'm Paul and I'm in my second week of reboot now. I've been struggling with this for twenty some years now.
I have a very understanding wife who I love dearly and I have two kids with. She has caught me a few times with my pants down.
Every time I've promised to do better, find help and put an end to it. I tried talking to a psychiatrist, doctor and other caregivers.
But everytime it followed the same pattern. I was cooperative and convinced in the beginning and kept on the good path for a few months.
Then something small happened and the whole addiction spiralled out of control again.
This time I want to make real changes forgood. I started reading YBOP and other websites that led me to this place.
So I am looking for someone I can relate to and discuss things with we come across during our journey. Besides dealing with the addiction I'm also dealing with another related issue and that is being not fair with my wife over the addiction. I want to talk to her about my problems but I find it hard to do so. An AP who can relate to that also would be helpfull. It is my belief that this will take a long time and will commit at least one year. Please write me your story and concerns and maybe we can help out eachother.
Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: Phil-Anthropy on May 30, 2019, 02:28:06 AM
I'm looking for an AP to help me through the reboot.  I prefer someone in the same boat as I am (single, atheist, gay), but if you are not and you are okay with all three of these facets of me, I would be willing to partner up.  I hope to hear from someone.  Thanks, guys.
Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: Iloveicecream on August 27, 2019, 10:44:11 AM
Hi, I am Looking for an AP. Anyone willing to join the battle:)?
Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: SaxonJack on December 20, 2019, 11:02:36 AM
55 year-old married guy here, would like to find a friend in similar situation to encourage one another through our reboot.  I've been a regular porn user since age 14, but 6 years ago when wife experienced some health issues and was unable to "perform" on a regular basis,  I found my PMO gradually becoming more and more frequent to the point of almost every day.  The last 4 or 5 months I've been experiencing PIED which really scares me. 

I'm not sure how much accountability is possible inside this forum which relies upon anonymity.
But, I"m hopeful that confession may provide a benefit to my problem (and yours).
If you are willing to give it a try, please  message me.

I will remove this post as soon as I am no longer seeking an accountability partner.

Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: irvgmz on January 20, 2020, 09:56:54 AM
Hello, I am a 41 yr old recently divorced guy. I am looking for someone to partner with as an accountability partner in this journey for growth. I have been using p since I was about 14 and am severely addicted. It is difficult for me to go day without indulging in it. But I just started working with a professional and he is helping me expose my erroneous thought patterns.
Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: OwainOwen on January 25, 2020, 01:32:14 PM

Also seeking accountability partner.

Male, 49, UK base and timezones.

Long-term porn problems, also associated social media and more generalised internet addiction (self-diagnosed).

I'm in a long-term relationship and relatively stable in many ways. I'm a recovering drug and alcohol addict (and cigarettes) with about six years clean in that recovery.

I've started a journal but if anyone wants to join in then I'd be interested. I see that the two previous posts are from gentlemen in a similar age group and I'd be very happy to chat to you guys!

Cheers, OO.
Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: mydonspace on February 07, 2020, 10:46:09 AM
I'm 44 and was introduced to porn at a young age.  Although my porn use didn't escalate until high speed internet came and it was all downhill from there with the smartphone.  I was going from one dopamine rush to another sometimes spending a good part of my work day and evenings paging through porn sites.  Eventually that wasn't enough for me so I begin sexting with girls.  As a married man this just caused extra anxiety for me. I picked up running six years ago and it helped minimize my use, but anytime hard times arised I was back at it again with the porn and sexting. 

I've also been a causal meditator, but came across a 30 day online class at the beginning of the year and challenged myself to stick with it.  My meditation streak is still alive today.  I'm free of porn and chatting, but triggered by the occasional social media post and when that happens I hide it from my feed to not act out on it. Meditation has given me a clearer mindset, but at the same time my mind is looping with the guilt and anxiety for the questionable things I've done in the past. 

I have a therapist I meet with once a week, but it's hard to stay calm when I have all these thoughts bottled up inside waiting to discuss with her the following week.  I hope to be able find someone to discuss similar experiences to ease the process a little better.
Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: Ismael on February 16, 2020, 06:35:37 AM
Hi, everyone

My name is Ismael, I am from Spain. I can write English more or less, so I imagine this is going to be helpful for me.
I have a erectile disfunction. I watch half an hour of porn every day and masturbate. When I watched some of the videos here, I realized porn addiction was my problem. So this is why I need help. I tried to give it up but I only remained not wathing porn for a week, but erectile disfunction was still on.

I am looking for an accountability partner. Please if you want to be one, I will thank you a lot.

Best wishes to you all
Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: BCB on March 18, 2020, 06:07:39 PM
Hi, I am Looking for an AP. Anyone willing to join the battle:)?
I am open to teaming up to overcoming this attachment to porn. How shall we begin?
Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: buddah77 on April 23, 2020, 09:12:47 AM
I am 43 and recently discovered this whole porn issue. I am slowly realizing just how damaging it is but despite all of my efforts I am unable to make a permanent change. I'd like to ask if someone would like to go through this with me. I really need help with this.
Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: Fitdaddy50 on May 18, 2020, 06:51:57 AM
I am reaching out as one who has been struggling Under the weight of this addiction for nearly 40 years. I am married (for the second time), with two great young children and a strong wife. There is a lot of positive energy both personally and professionally in my life. However, I am exhausted from this addiction and attempting to manage it  on my own. I know that one of the keys to my freedom is Having a relationship of accountability and Vulnerability with a fellow traveler.  Someone with whom I can Build trust and commitment, Someone with whom I am available to and who I am able to get in touch with at any time when the temptation is too overwhelming.

Thanks for listening.
Title: Re: **Accountability Partner Requests**
Post by: Fitdaddy50 on May 19, 2020, 03:30:39 AM
Hi Mydonspace,

I read your posts and resonate with a lot of what you've shared. I am very new to Reboot Nation, and have been struggling with porn for 40 of my 50 years. I have a strong wife and two great young kids, but have no idea what it's like to go without porn and habitual masturbating for any length of time. I know the benefits of are countless in every aspect of life, but I feel like I've been stuck spinning my wheels for years. I practice Transcendental Mediation daily, been a yoga student for over a decade, and have upped my fitness and health game in recent weeks. This can only do me good. But the one thing I need in order to become abstinent from porn is an accountability partner. I'd love to hear more about your journey and your interest in the same. Thanks!