Reboot Nation

Reboot Nation Forum => Porn Induced Erectile Dysfunction/Delayed Ejaculation => Topic started by: Hisself on June 26, 2017, 10:49:44 AM

Title: Gary Wilson says some people are permanently damaged
Post by: Hisself on June 26, 2017, 10:49:44 AM
Just saw a recent presentation by Gary Wilson on the effects of porn on the brain. If you are interested it's his talk in instanbul from 2016 on YouTube. About halfway through he stated that in the past few years he has seen cases show up where guys have done permanent damage to their reward system and will never heal their sexual dysfunctions. He didn't go into further detail on why he thinks that and what it is about these guys that makes them different and beyond repair. I've been searching everywhere to find out more about this. I don't know why he wouldn't elaborate further on this but it kinda scares the shit out of me. What do you guys think about this?
Title: Re: Gary Wilson says some people are permanently damaged
Post by: CROUS on June 26, 2017, 03:42:12 PM
Hi Hisself,

I just watched the youtube talk (see here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=17WEzwGFlM8 ). And what he says is this (I start at min. 10:15):

"... Here is the scary part for us since we observe what goes on in these forums. Men 35 and older who did not grow up using internet porn; they often
heal their sexual problems in maybe six weeks, eight weeks, at the longest twelve weeks. And their healing is stable. They feel great; the problem never
returns. However, what we have started to see in the last three years is that young men in their twenties who grew up using internet porn, especially those
who grew up using what are called porn tube sites where you can stream videos, little clips, they often need six to twelve months to heal. Sometimes two years.
And they are often unstable. We are starting to see a few in the last year or two that we think will never heal, will never be normal. So why is that? ... " (I stop at min. 11:22. After that he goes on with the well-known explanations on the reward circuit and sexual conditioning to screens and pixels).

So first of all - chill out and do not spread panic!

Secondly, although he explains the reward circuit after the quoted excerpt of his presentation/talk, he never says that (and I quote you here) "guys have done permanent damage to their reward system and will never heal their sexual dysfunctions." He simply does not say that. Your claim is based on YOUR flawed interpretation of the talk. Why is it flawed, you may ask. Because you construct your argument from the proximity of his elaborations on the reward circuit to one very specific (but rather secondary) point to his well known bifurcated categorization of men who suffer from PIED (old/young; and young needs longer; and here is the secondary point = some of those young never recover).

Thirdly, why could it be that people do not heal? Well as I said elsewhere, the entire studies of PIED is pretty much in the making. Exciting times for scientist - I bet. However, as of right now, they (him included) deduce their hypotheses from observations, that is, journal entries, stories of people who relapse all the time, stories of people who made it, etc. So, taking that into consideration when he says "We are starting to see a few in the last year or two that we think will never heal, will never be normal" could simply mean that they observe people who do not recover and they do never recover. He never said - not even with one single syllable - that this lack of recovery is due to "permanent damage to the reward system". And he surely did not say that brain studies would confirm such a claim. His phrasing at the end of the talk sums up our situation pretty neatly: He uses the verb "experiment" when talking about what we do with Nofap and no PMO. He simply hypothesized about the causes of PIED by looking at what we write about our experiences during a reboot. (If you cannot tell, I am having those mood swing pretty badly these days...sorry for that).

So, if you read as many stories and journals and what not as I have you will see a pattern or at least reasons for why people might "never heal": They relapse all the time, they do not change their life-style, they are just half-assing it (no hard mode). Or in short: They don't follow through due to a lack of commitment/ or due to a very strong addiction without a social network that could enable them to follow through on their goal. I mean, how many stories have you read where people are just complaining all the time and change nothing at all. Talking can be therapeutic, sure, but not taking action and just talking to feel better for five minutes is not gonna wing it. Consequently, those guys they never heal.

And lastly, your claim (which is build on a flawed interpretation of the talk), completely neglects the fact of neuroplacicitiy (as it is called, I believe). That is the brain's ability to be shaped and reshaped due to exterior impulses and habit formation. Brains do change. That is an established scientific fact. So if Gary's hypothesis is true (that internet porn causes ED and other dysfunctions) then - just by moving within the logic of his argument - you can exclude permanent sexual dysfunctions caused by watching porn alone (I am not including nerve damage here, cause well, if you have that than you have that).

So: I conclude that of course there are people who will never heal and will never return to normal. There always are addicts who break on their addiction. It is up to you to take the steps needed to get out of that bad space you are in right now. I read stories from guys who started watching hardcore porn at the age of eight (!) and still recovered.
There is hope, my friend. Do not despair.

By the way, appreciate you addressing this talk (totally missed it) and posting your easy-to-make misinterpretation. There is no reason for people to lose hope because of it.
Stick to your guns. Reboot. Rewire. And live life.

Good luck y'all.

Peace.


PS: If you re-watch the talk, you will find out that Gary uses the word "never" pretty casually too, when he goes on with his rhetorical question of why older men in their sixties recover faster than "a young man in his prime, healthiest can be, can NEVER normally function with a woman." I mean, come on...you know they can after a good old reboot...
Title: Re: Gary Wilson says some people are permanently damaged
Post by: Hope_81 on June 26, 2017, 03:57:57 PM
Hey Buddy,
I think you mean this video
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=17WEzwGFlM8&t=170s

I do not think that Gary speaking about unrepairable damages to brain caused by porn. He said that some guys needs more time, sometime up to 2 years to recover.
Recently I had meeting with the best Urologist - Andrologist in Bulgaria. I told him that Viagra nor Cialis worked for me and the only condition to get and keep an ejection is to open several tabs in my HD Television or reverse at least 5 virtual mates. 
He told me that the damages caused by delta Fos B could ruin the brain and in case above drugs did not work it could be irreversible.   :(
He proposed to me 3 things:
- Wait more time.
- Alprostadil. Injection for direct in the penis.
- Papaverin. Injection for direct in the penis.

I tried the last one. I have small improvement.

I am optimistic as Gary always says for many successful stories. You can see the end of the Great Porn Experiment. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wSF82AwSDiU

I hope everyone of us will recover one day.
Title: Re: Gary Wilson says some people are permanently damaged
Post by: Hisself on June 26, 2017, 04:04:03 PM
I highly appreciate both of your responses and take on this subject. I am 8 months no pmo and have noticed many improvements but I'm not sure how my pied is doing since I'm nothing short of terrified of sex and failing. I wish you all the best of luck. I've had a fetish way before porn and it's the only thing I've ever gotten off to and this is why I believe I have innate wiring that would make sex difficult, add on over a decade of high speed porn and taking drugs to stay up days on end pmoing and I could see how permanent sexual dysfunctions could develop. That's why hearing Gary say this freaks me out so much.
Title: Re: Gary Wilson says some people are permanently damaged
Post by: aquarius25 on June 27, 2017, 01:41:06 PM
I think both responses are awesome!! Seriously great job guys!

Hisself, take some deep breaths. Seriously. I have read here so many times about men putting sex on such a huge pedestal that even when the PIED starts to improve they have an extreme abundance of performance anxiety. I think if you are cruising to hook up on a one night stand and you want to show this woman the most amazing sex ever, you probably won't. One thing that doesn't get addressed often in any of the forum here is how porn has really had an impact on what healthy sex actually looks like. Porn not only can impact your opinions of women and increase objectification but it has impacted your thoughts on men and how to perform. At the end of the day, it's just sex. It's supposed to be fun, not scary. It a great time if both people are having fun and enjoying each other. If one person is super anxious and freaked out, well that isn't fun for anyone. If you are with someone who you are comfortable with, who is your friend. Someone, you can let your guard down and be yourself. Even if you fool around but things don't quite work right, most women don't care. It's more about the experience of spending time with the other person and connecting on a deeper level. So just chill. Meet a nice woman. Enjoy her presents and allow things to come organically. But more than anything, hard mode first and get a handle on your addiction. Everything will be ok. Don't over think things. Everything will be ok. Keep up the good work! And breath!
Title: Re: Gary Wilson says some people are permanently damaged
Post by: Androg on June 28, 2017, 01:59:08 PM
Hisself,

Sorry you're struggling with anxiety at the moment. I think you should consider revising your goals so you ease your distress around sex. The sooner you make friendly contact with potential partners, the more relaxed you will feel.

Standard advice for anyone with sexual performance anxiety is to take all performance pressure off of yourself at first when you're with a partner. Just tell the person you want to go slowly and get to know them (for a month even). Any kind of affectionate touch and kissing is beneficial for you both, but don't try to have intercourse or even receive oral sex until you feel completely ready.

There's no rush, and the easy, relaxed contact is very good preparation for enjoyable sex. This page may have useful tips for your partner: http://yourbrainonporn.com/boyfriend-quitting-porn-5-tips

I think it's also good to tell a prospective partner what you've been experimenting with (rebooting). Most will be very sympathetic...and impressed.

You'll be fine. All the best.
Title: Re: Gary Wilson says some people are permanently damaged
Post by: DepressedAndOut on July 07, 2017, 12:43:39 AM
Hi Hisself,

I just watched the youtube talk (see here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=17WEzwGFlM8 ). And what he says is this (I start at min. 10:15):

"... Here is the scary part for us since we observe what goes on in these forums. Men 35 and older who did not grow up using internet porn; they often
heal their sexual problems in maybe six weeks, eight weeks, at the longest twelve weeks. And their healing is stable. They feel great; the problem never
returns. However, what we have started to see in the last three years is that young men in their twenties who grew up using internet porn, especially those
who grew up using what are called porn tube sites where you can stream videos, little clips, they often need six to twelve months to heal. Sometimes two years.
And they are often unstable. We are starting to see a few in the last year or two that we think will never heal, will never be normal. So why is that? ... " (I stop at min. 11:22. After that he goes on with the well-known explanations on the reward circuit and sexual conditioning to screens and pixels).

So first of all - chill out and do not spread panic!

Secondly, although he explains the reward circuit after the quoted excerpt of his presentation/talk, he never says that (and I quote you here) "guys have done permanent damage to their reward system and will never heal their sexual dysfunctions." He simply does not say that. Your claim is based on YOUR flawed interpretation of the talk. Why is it flawed, you may ask. Because you construct your argument from the proximity of his elaborations on the reward circuit to one very specific (but rather secondary) point to his well known bifurcated categorization of men who suffer from PIED (old/young; and young needs longer; and here is the secondary point = some of those young never recover).

Thirdly, why could it be that people do not heal? Well as I said elsewhere, the entire studies of PIED is pretty much in the making. Exciting times for scientist - I bet. However, as of right now, they (him included) deduce their hypotheses from observations, that is, journal entries, stories of people who relapse all the time, stories of people who made it, etc. So, taking that into consideration when he says "We are starting to see a few in the last year or two that we think will never heal, will never be normal" could simply mean that they observe people who do not recover and they do never recover. He never said - not even with one single syllable - that this lack of recovery is due to "permanent damage to the reward system". And he surely did not say that brain studies would confirm such a claim. His phrasing at the end of the talk sums up our situation pretty neatly: He uses the verb "experiment" when talking about what we do with Nofap and no PMO. He simply hypothesized about the causes of PIED by looking at what we write about our experiences during a reboot. (If you cannot tell, I am having those mood swing pretty badly these days...sorry for that).

So, if you read as many stories and journals and what not as I have you will see a pattern or at least reasons for why people might "never heal": They relapse all the time, they do not change their life-style, they are just half-assing it (no hard mode). Or in short: They don't follow through due to a lack of commitment/ or due to a very strong addiction without a social network that could enable them to follow through on their goal. I mean, how many stories have you read where people are just complaining all the time and change nothing at all. Talking can be therapeutic, sure, but not taking action and just talking to feel better for five minutes is not gonna wing it. Consequently, those guys they never heal.

And lastly, your claim (which is build on a flawed interpretation of the talk), completely neglects the fact of neuroplacicitiy (as it is called, I believe). That is the brain's ability to be shaped and reshaped due to exterior impulses and habit formation. Brains do change. That is an established scientific fact. So if Gary's hypothesis is true (that internet porn causes ED and other dysfunctions) then - just by moving within the logic of his argument - you can exclude permanent sexual dysfunctions caused by watching porn alone (I am not including nerve damage here, cause well, if you have that than you have that).

So: I conclude that of course there are people who will never heal and will never return to normal. There always are addicts who break on their addiction. It is up to you to take the steps needed to get out of that bad space you are in right now. I read stories from guys who started watching hardcore porn at the age of eight (!) and still recovered.
There is hope, my friend. Do not despair.

By the way, appreciate you addressing this talk (totally missed it) and posting your easy-to-make misinterpretation. There is no reason for people to lose hope because of it.
Stick to your guns. Reboot. Rewire. And live life.

Good luck y'all.

Peace.


PS: If you re-watch the talk, you will find out that Gary uses the word "never" pretty casually too, when he goes on with his rhetorical question of why older men in their sixties recover faster than "a young man in his prime, healthiest can be, can NEVER normally function with a woman." I mean, come on...you know they can after a good old reboot...

I'm sorry, but I don't agree with your interpretation. I think Gary Wilson already explained why some will never recover: the connections and pruning that the brain undergoes during adolescences years.

Title: Re: Gary Wilson says some people are permanently damaged
Post by: scorpion1386 on July 07, 2017, 05:52:17 AM
So depressedandout, you're saying that this is a permanent issue now? Why?
Title: Re: Gary Wilson says some people are permanently damaged
Post by: DepressedAndOut on July 07, 2017, 06:28:17 AM
Because of Gary Wilsons explanation of the scientific mechanism of porns effects on the adolescent mind who doesn't experience real sex.

The explanation was not about the 'will power' to give it up.
Title: Re: Gary Wilson says some people are permanently damaged
Post by: jerryson on July 07, 2017, 06:42:10 AM
please want to get something clear here....  are u say that those who started young and had no real sexual exposure with real partners might not recover?
Title: Re: Gary Wilson says some people are permanently damaged
Post by: scorpion1386 on July 07, 2017, 06:45:28 AM
please want to get something clear here....  are u say that those who started young and had no real sexual exposure with real partners might not recover?

Yes. I am in this category too. Why would this be? This makes no sense. Wouldn't there be an article on YBOP about it? Now I'm fucking scared man...
Title: Re: Gary Wilson says some people are permanently damaged
Post by: Si on July 07, 2017, 07:02:29 AM
please want to get something clear here....  are u say that those who started young and had no real sexual exposure with real partners might not recover?

Yes. I am in this category too. Why would this be? This makes no sense. Wouldn't there be an article on YBOP about it? Now I'm fucking scared man...


I'm same category too... But I'm definitely healing. Think this thread is down to a bit of misinterpretation... I think Gary was quoting the worries of some of the men he's talked with.
Title: Re: Gary Wilson says some people are permanently damaged
Post by: chpcbr on July 07, 2017, 07:43:48 AM
There's no need or point in spreading this kind of terror. I also think there's a misunderstanding of Wilson's words, but even if he actually meant that... it doesn't mean it's true. One of the core messages of YBOP is about neuroplasticity, so to conclude that certain people or categories are hopeless one would need some serious evidence (and time, this whole thing is still too fresh) against such plasticity. There's none.

Personally (and sadly) my PMO habit long predated my actual sexual experiences, yet my sexual life has been far from a complete disaster. Affected by the habit, yes, sometimes, in some phases. I don't want to downplay the impact of PMO, but I've had quality erections and quality sex most of the time.

It may be a long and bumpy road, but it always leads somewhere.

Title: Re: Gary Wilson says some people are permanently damaged
Post by: CROUS on July 07, 2017, 07:46:15 AM
Hi Hisself,

I just watched the youtube talk (see here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=17WEzwGFlM8 ). And what he says is this (I start at min. 10:15):

"... Here is the scary part for us since we observe what goes on in these forums. Men 35 and older who did not grow up using internet porn; they often
heal their sexual problems in maybe six weeks, eight weeks, at the longest twelve weeks. And their healing is stable. They feel great; the problem never
returns. However, what we have started to see in the last three years is that young men in their twenties who grew up using internet porn, especially those
who grew up using what are called porn tube sites where you can stream videos, little clips, they often need six to twelve months to heal. Sometimes two years.
And they are often unstable. We are starting to see a few in the last year or two that we think will never heal, will never be normal. So why is that? ... " (I stop at min. 11:22. After that he goes on with the well-known explanations on the reward circuit and sexual conditioning to screens and pixels).

So first of all - chill out and do not spread panic!

Secondly, although he explains the reward circuit after the quoted excerpt of his presentation/talk, he never says that (and I quote you here) "guys have done permanent damage to their reward system and will never heal their sexual dysfunctions." He simply does not say that. Your claim is based on YOUR flawed interpretation of the talk. Why is it flawed, you may ask. Because you construct your argument from the proximity of his elaborations on the reward circuit to one very specific (but rather secondary) point to his well known bifurcated categorization of men who suffer from PIED (old/young; and young needs longer; and here is the secondary point = some of those young never recover).

Thirdly, why could it be that people do not heal? Well as I said elsewhere, the entire studies of PIED is pretty much in the making. Exciting times for scientist - I bet. However, as of right now, they (him included) deduce their hypotheses from observations, that is, journal entries, stories of people who relapse all the time, stories of people who made it, etc. So, taking that into consideration when he says "We are starting to see a few in the last year or two that we think will never heal, will never be normal" could simply mean that they observe people who do not recover and they do never recover. He never said - not even with one single syllable - that this lack of recovery is due to "permanent damage to the reward system". And he surely did not say that brain studies would confirm such a claim. His phrasing at the end of the talk sums up our situation pretty neatly: He uses the verb "experiment" when talking about what we do with Nofap and no PMO. He simply hypothesized about the causes of PIED by looking at what we write about our experiences during a reboot. (If you cannot tell, I am having those mood swing pretty badly these days...sorry for that).

So, if you read as many stories and journals and what not as I have you will see a pattern or at least reasons for why people might "never heal": They relapse all the time, they do not change their life-style, they are just half-assing it (no hard mode). Or in short: They don't follow through due to a lack of commitment/ or due to a very strong addiction without a social network that could enable them to follow through on their goal. I mean, how many stories have you read where people are just complaining all the time and change nothing at all. Talking can be therapeutic, sure, but not taking action and just talking to feel better for five minutes is not gonna wing it. Consequently, those guys they never heal.

And lastly, your claim (which is build on a flawed interpretation of the talk), completely neglects the fact of neuroplacicitiy (as it is called, I believe). That is the brain's ability to be shaped and reshaped due to exterior impulses and habit formation. Brains do change. That is an established scientific fact. So if Gary's hypothesis is true (that internet porn causes ED and other dysfunctions) then - just by moving within the logic of his argument - you can exclude permanent sexual dysfunctions caused by watching porn alone (I am not including nerve damage here, cause well, if you have that than you have that).

So: I conclude that of course there are people who will never heal and will never return to normal. There always are addicts who break on their addiction. It is up to you to take the steps needed to get out of that bad space you are in right now. I read stories from guys who started watching hardcore porn at the age of eight (!) and still recovered.
There is hope, my friend. Do not despair.

By the way, appreciate you addressing this talk (totally missed it) and posting your easy-to-make misinterpretation. There is no reason for people to lose hope because of it.
Stick to your guns. Reboot. Rewire. And live life.

Good luck y'all.

Peace.


PS: If you re-watch the talk, you will find out that Gary uses the word "never" pretty casually too, when he goes on with his rhetorical question of why older men in their sixties recover faster than "a young man in his prime, healthiest can be, can NEVER normally function with a woman." I mean, come on...you know they can after a good old reboot...

I'm sorry, but I don't agree with your interpretation. I think Gary Wilson already explained why some will never recover: the connections and pruning that the brain undergoes during adolescences years.



Well, that does not make any sense then since many who started out on porn did recover nevertheless...
Being depressed and giving up (or what does your name imply - sorry, I just get annoyed by people who spread ill-informed "opinions" and scare other people. If you wanna have a discussion about the alleged permanency of brain changes/ sexual conditioning, list your arguments) does not seem to be the right way to solve this problem.
Will power and social interaction are two important aspects to tackle that addiction; especially when you consider that the latest research on addiction point towards social isolation as one of the key aspects promoting addictions. As soon as you interact with other human beings (or do all those beneficial things others listed elsewhere on YBOP and here) and stop watching porn, your brain will have to adopt to the new reality you create. Those new interactions and habits will set impulses it has to react to - since a brain is not static/ unchangeable but the contrary.
So, the logical consequence is: give up high speed internet porn, go out and meet people, and stop moping around and obsessing about day counts (a purely psychological tool to help you through reboot) and what constitutes a relapse and what does not.

Peace.
Title: Re: Gary Wilson says some people are permanently damaged
Post by: DepressedAndOut on July 07, 2017, 01:06:26 PM
I wa simply posting my interpretation of what Gary Wilson was saying. I truly hope im wrong, but this issue is something that we need to investigate further.
Title: Re: Gary Wilson says some people are permanently damaged
Post by: CROUS on July 08, 2017, 03:01:03 PM
I wa simply posting my interpretation of what Gary Wilson was saying. I truly hope im wrong, but this issue is something that we need to investigate further.

You are right, DepressedAndOut.
Sorry for being this upfront, no personal attack was intended.
And yes, a discussion about this would be the best thing we could do.

Peace.
Title: Re: Gary Wilson says some people are permanently damaged
Post by: DepressedAndOut on July 09, 2017, 03:31:36 AM
That's fine. Thanks.
Title: Re: Gary Wilson says some people are permanently damaged
Post by: DepressedAndOut on July 29, 2017, 01:14:52 PM
Is it possible for the natural sexual pathway in the brain to wither due to disuse??

Especially if  you're in your mid 30s and never been alone with a woman. (Intimately)
Title: Re: Gary Wilson says some people are permanently damaged
Post by: scorpion1386 on July 29, 2017, 02:50:56 PM
Is it possible for the natural sexual pathway in the brain to wither due to disuse??

Especially if  you're in your mid 30s and never been alone with a woman. (Intimately)

I'm curious to know this as well.
Title: Re: Gary Wilson says some people are permanently damaged
Post by: Hope_81 on August 17, 2017, 03:30:31 PM
Hey Fellows,
Please take a look at one of the latest interviews of Gary Wilson in Steven Crowder broadcast show.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j0s3WFENlZ4&t=54s
This man always speaks about positives after quitting porn. There are many evidences that if you stay away for long time you will recover from PIED and all other porn induces problems.

However I saw another video. This is Norman Doidge. He wrote the bestseller The brain that changes itself.
As you probably know when you watch porn and edging you create the neuron protein Delta fos be. Mr. Doidge says that it can cause irreversible changes in the brain. It sounds not pretty much optimistic.     
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_X-KtntITtE
Title: Re: Gary Wilson says some people are permanently damaged
Post by: DepressedAndOut on August 18, 2017, 04:55:25 AM
This is just so depressing and hopeless - I just feel so sucidal.

What a hideous life I've lived so far. Not one kiss, not one hug, not one intimate moment. No deep connection with anyone whatsoever. And I'm nearly 34.

I feel so sick.
Title: Re: Gary Wilson says some people are permanently damaged
Post by: scorpion1386 on August 18, 2017, 05:07:23 AM
This is just so depressing and hopeless - I just feel so sucidal.

What a hideous life I've lived so far. Not one kiss, not one hug, not one intimate moment. No deep connection with anyone whatsoever. And I'm nearly 34.

I feel so sick.

You're thinking negative. Please stop it. There is hope. The brain is neuroplastic.
Title: Re: Gary Wilson says some people are permanently damaged
Post by: DepressedAndOut on August 18, 2017, 05:24:16 AM
This is just so depressing and hopeless - I just feel so sucidal.

What a hideous life I've lived so far. Not one kiss, not one hug, not one intimate moment. No deep connection with anyone whatsoever. And I'm nearly 34.

I feel so sick.

You're thinking negative. Please stop it. There is hope. The brain is neuroplastic.

But what about the effects of Delta Fos B? And, in my case, the pathway to real sexual experience may have been withered away due to not getting one chance of intimacy with a woman. What about that??

Can you blame me for being negative about my chances to heal... ? It will only get more diifucult to heal  as I get older.
Title: Re: Gary Wilson says some people are permanently damaged
Post by: Hisself on August 18, 2017, 02:20:04 PM
I'm the op and although I am not fully healed I have seen a lot of progress as far as pied. I've never had successful sex and have only gotten off to fetish porn. 10 months ago I couldn't even get a strong erection with porn and lately even after my first relapse last week I've gotten erections just talking in bed with a girl that I don't even find attractive. I still have a long way to go but I didn't think it was possible. Keep your head up.
Title: Re: Gary Wilson says some people are permanently damaged
Post by: DepressedAndOut on August 19, 2017, 04:28:14 AM
How old are you and how firm was the erection?
Title: Re: Gary Wilson says some people are permanently damaged
Post by: Hisself on August 19, 2017, 10:25:27 AM
24 I've had strong ones at times and weak ones at others and none at all sometimes
Title: Re: Gary Wilson says some people are permanently damaged
Post by: ben vellani on August 23, 2017, 06:02:47 AM
Good advice.
Don't rush cos it will make more psychological pressure.

Hisself,

Sorry you're struggling with anxiety at the moment. I think you should consider revising your goals so you ease your distress around sex. The sooner you make friendly contact with potential partners, the more relaxed you will feel.

Standard advice for anyone with sexual performance anxiety is to take all performance pressure off of yourself at first when you're with a partner. Just tell the person you want to go slowly and get to know them (for a month even). Any kind of affectionate touch and kissing is beneficial for you both, but don't try to have intercourse or even receive oral sex until you feel completely ready.

There's no rush, and the easy, relaxed contact is very good preparation for enjoyable sex. This page may have useful tips for your partner: https://eddrugs2017.com/porn-induced-erectile-dysfunction/

I think it's also good to tell a prospective partner what you've been experimenting with (rebooting). Most will be very sympathetic...and impressed.

You'll be fine. All the best. Source (https://malepenisenlargementpills.com/)
Title: Re: Gary Wilson says some people are permanently damaged
Post by: Hope_81 on August 28, 2017, 05:16:14 PM
Dear DepressedAndOut,
Let me show you some videos. Please take a look at the videos below and watch them from the beginning till the end.

Here the owner of this board Gabe Deem says: "The good news is that you can recover"
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ltIjTeDKIh4&t=47s

In other longer video he says: "I felt I will never recover."
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r8kJ387-rzg&t=46s

Please watch the story of the legend man Noah Church.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GXtEcQGLWW8
He successfully recovered PIED after 3 months fully abstaining from PMO. He is a friend of mine. Noah sent to me his book with the words: "Dear, PIED is fully reversible. You need to remove the porn form your live."

Last but not least. Bear in mind that there is a section successful stories in this forum board. You can check it. 

Not one kiss, not one hug, not one intimate moment. No deep connection with anyone whatsoever. And I'm nearly 34.

I feel so sick.

Buddy it sounds so familiar for me. As I am not really attractive for the women I feel ignored and isolated by them. Moreover I have childfree position /do not want to have kids/ and it is really hard to find women with same positions in my country Bulgaria.
I can understand how you feel. Please feel free to contact me via private message.
If you want you can write to my Facebook group in my signature below.

Do not give up and stay strong.
Title: Re: Gary Wilson says some people are permanently damaged
Post by: DepressedAndOut on August 29, 2017, 12:42:58 PM
Thank you for your help.

However, the difference between me and the likes of Gabe, Noah, etc, is  that they had sex while they were in adolescence or mid 20's.

But I'm in my mid 30's and still a virgin.

They have, in their brain, the neural pathway associated with sex which was reawakened after doing no fap.

I don't have such advantage.

I've joined your facebook group and downloaded the treating pornography PDF - hopefully that will help in strengthening my recovery process.
Title: Re: Gary Wilson says some people are permanently damaged
Post by: Hope_81 on September 07, 2017, 04:34:32 PM
Hey buddy,
Do not miss Gary Wilson's book Your Brain on Porn.
http://www.mediafire.com/file/eynw5hkaa5ri41w/Gary+Wilson+-+Your+Brain+on+P%2Arn+Internet+P%2Arnography+and+the+Emerging+Science+of+Addiction.pdf

It is really worth!

Take a look at the latest interview of Gary Wilson.   
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mhqx7yctQVk&t=9s
He says that younger man grew up with Internet porn recover PIED much slower than the older man. Sometimes it can take 2 or 3 years until they can get an erection with real partner and be able to have sex.
I think that the real thing is something else. It not depends how old are you, but what real sex experience you have before the Internet age. Somewhere in the subconsciousness the real neuropath way still existing. They just need to revoke it and bring it back to their consciousness. That is why it can take shorter period than the younger guys who have no experience with real sex. They need to build this neuropath from scratch. That is why they recover for longer period of time.
Unfortunately in case you are old guy /over 30/ and you have not much or not at all real sex experience you will need more time to recover PIED. I hope it will happens one day. Just do not stop believe and be strong.

I wish luck to everyone struggling porn induced porblems!
Title: Re: Gary Wilson says some people are permanently damaged
Post by: DepressedAndOut on September 08, 2017, 12:18:16 PM
Thank you. I've read Gary Wilson's book - it did help my understanding.

Yes, I do worry that i'm in my mid 30's and never had an intimate moment with a women. Maybe this is why right now, and have been for the last six month, not been able to feel anything when a hot woman is in front of me. (real woman, I mean.)

Title: Re: Gary Wilson says some people are permanently damaged
Post by: xburnerphonex on September 09, 2017, 03:03:46 AM
Thank you. I've read Gary Wilson's book - it did help my understanding.

Yes, I do worry that i'm in my mid 30's and never had an intimate moment with a women. Maybe this is why right now, and have been for the last six month, not been able to feel anything when a hot woman is in front of me. (real woman, I mean.)

Have you read this success story (http://www.rebootnation.org/forum/index.php?topic=10800.0)? It's about a person within a similar age range as you who has pretty much recovered from PIED; he regularly responds to inquiries in the thread too.
Title: Re: Gary Wilson says some people are permanently damaged
Post by: Hope_81 on October 11, 2017, 04:43:48 PM
Hi Fellows,
I think that it is worth to watch the latest Gary's presentation. It was quite interesting and exciding for me. This man is genius. Probably the most aware man on the planet about the Porn problem.
Have a nice and calm watching.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZLtSoWrEplM&t=326s
Title: Re: Gary Wilson says some people are permanently damaged
Post by: Jones on October 11, 2017, 10:21:58 PM
Quote
He says that younger man grew up with Internet porn recover PIED much slower than the older man. Sometimes it can take 2 or 3 years until they can get an erection with real partner and be able to have sex. 
I think that the real thing is something else. It not depends how old are you, but what real sex experience you have before the Internet age. Somewhere in the subconsciousness the real neuropath way still existing. They just need to revoke it and bring it back to their consciousness. That is why it can take shorter period than the younger guys who have no experience with real sex. They need to build this neuropath from scratch. That is why they recover for longer period of time. 
Unfortunately in case you are old guy /over 30/ and you have not much or not at all real sex experience you will need more time to recover PIED. I hope it will happens one day. Just do not stop believe and be strong.

I wish luck to everyone struggling porn induced porblems! 

OK so I'm 16....I'll Soon be 17.started pmoing at 12 I guess and I realized I needed to stop when I was 15.keep in mind I don't have pied cuz I can get aroused by touching myself or if I'm fooling around with a girl. If i try that now though it wont work cuz im in a deep flatline. What i have is performance anxiety. My real question is would you consider that I as a guy who grew up with porn ? And how long do you think it'd take me since I'm a virgin but I have a little experience with girls?.I get the chance to have sex alot but I'm just too nervous.
Title: Re: Gary Wilson says some people are permanently damaged
Post by: Androg on October 12, 2017, 01:19:59 PM
@BG_Dude_1981:

A new study makes a lot of the same points about the "perceived addiction" claims as Gary has.

"Do Cyber Pornography Use Inventory-9 Scores Reflect Actual Compulsivity in Internet Pornography Use? Exploring the Role of Abstinence Effort": Sexual Addiction & Compulsivity: (http://tandfonline.com/doi/10.1080/10720162.2017.1344166)

Gary's write-up about it: "Study invalidates the CPUI-9 as an instrument to assess either “perceived pornography addiction” or actual pornography addiction" | Your Brain On Porn (https://yourbrainonporn.com/study-invalidates-cpui-9-instrument-assess-either-%E2%80%9Cperceived-pornography-addiction%E2%80%9D-or-actual)
Title: Re: Gary Wilson says some people are permanently damaged
Post by: DepressedAndOut on October 12, 2017, 02:27:39 PM
Hi Fellows,
I think that it is worth to watch the latest Gary's presentation. It was quite interesting and exciding for me. This man is genius. Probably the most aware man on the planet about the Porn problem.
Have a nice and calm watching.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZLtSoWrEplM&t=326s

is there anything new in that lecture? Specifically about whether some people are damaged permanently or not?
Title: Re: Gary Wilson says some people are permanently damaged
Post by: DepressedAndOut on October 13, 2017, 12:30:09 PM
I saw some of the new clip, and it confirmed something that I have been stating on here for a while now:

Intermittent use of porn, or a relapse, causes a worse PIED! This is because the neural pathways comes back  stronger with every use after some time of disuse.

The following day after my last relapse in mid-August, I noticed my penis shrinking and a lot less blood flow. I saw PIED at work for the first time in my life - and that's when I got a cold turkey and no longer crave porn.

Title: Re: Gary Wilson says some people are permanently damaged
Post by: Hope_81 on October 17, 2017, 01:51:44 PM
Hey DepressedAndOut,

Actually Gary shows some new stuff as perceived pornography addiction. He detailed explained some studies and his own works. Actually it is really worth to give 2 hours and watch the whole video. There is time for questions and answers in the final. As always he says that after long enough PMO abstaining the brain changes will reverse.
I belive that everyone of us can recover. The human brain is plastic. We need to be strong.
Title: Re: Gary Wilson says some people are permanently damaged
Post by: DepressedAndOut on October 18, 2017, 12:06:09 PM
Hello,


Yes, I intend to watch it soon.

Thank you.