I'm not off my reboot yet, so I don't have a personal experience with this, but I've read accounts of people that said they'd reboot for a few months, then have sex which led to o and then for some reason flatline again. Why is this? I thought the reboot process cures you of your issues?
O after reboot
- Thread starter grego
- Start date
Hey grego! First off I think everyone is different when it comes to their recovery. Have you watched Gabe's Youtube video when he talks about his?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I0dDLWGMhUo
He essentially needed 9 months to truly recover from his PIED and there are several rebooting accounts where the flatline has come back or taken much longer than anticipated. Everybody is different! I think the key is to not worry so much, your dick works, its your brain that needs rewiring and that process can take anything from 1-9 months or even more depending on various factors.
Also, just "rebooting for a few months" makes it sound a bit temporary, have these guys perhaps gone back to PMO? Or perhaps they simply had sex too early in their healing process? Were they actually there in the moment, enjoying the act with their partner or did they slip back into old ways and think about P or fantasies to get off and then realize it wasn't quite working?
Either way, from all the success stories and accounts I've read so far, it seems that this process of rewiring your brain back to a healthy, pre-porn mentality works. Gabe is a really good example of a true success story and for more check this page out:
http://yourbrainonporn.com/rebooting-accounts
Trust in the process and truly commit to becoming PMO free, even if it takes a year, what have you got to loose? You're here for a reason, you don't want to go back to that old life where you are addicted to porn. A future where you never look at porn again is what you should aim for and its one I think anyone can achieve with the right motivation!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I0dDLWGMhUo
He essentially needed 9 months to truly recover from his PIED and there are several rebooting accounts where the flatline has come back or taken much longer than anticipated. Everybody is different! I think the key is to not worry so much, your dick works, its your brain that needs rewiring and that process can take anything from 1-9 months or even more depending on various factors.
Also, just "rebooting for a few months" makes it sound a bit temporary, have these guys perhaps gone back to PMO? Or perhaps they simply had sex too early in their healing process? Were they actually there in the moment, enjoying the act with their partner or did they slip back into old ways and think about P or fantasies to get off and then realize it wasn't quite working?
Either way, from all the success stories and accounts I've read so far, it seems that this process of rewiring your brain back to a healthy, pre-porn mentality works. Gabe is a really good example of a true success story and for more check this page out:
http://yourbrainonporn.com/rebooting-accounts
Trust in the process and truly commit to becoming PMO free, even if it takes a year, what have you got to loose? You're here for a reason, you don't want to go back to that old life where you are addicted to porn. A future where you never look at porn again is what you should aim for and its one I think anyone can achieve with the right motivation!
M
Mart71
Guest
grego said:
There can be many reasons for this. First of all, "a few months" might not have been enough for these guys. Especially younger guys without solid sexual experience can take a long time to recover, but even guys with a lot of prior sexual experience (like GABE iirc) can take a very long time.
Then there is the thing, that recovery is not linear. Just because you can (or want to) have sex doesn't mean your libido and erections are fully recovered. You might just stand at maybe 60% full recovery to your potential and an orgasm in this still weakened state can have strong effects. It is therefore often recommended to reintroduce sex slowly and gently and be careful with orgasms.
This is where I stand myself. I could have sex (on ED drugs) after a month, but it wasn't pretty. And the orgasms would deflate my libido like a needle deflates a balloon. Many would say it was to soon and I probably agree, but i did it for personal relationship reasons. As my recovery continued, this got better from month to month and still improves.
I'd like to say, that seeing a reboot as a "cure" is problematic. Sure, it can "cure" you of ED and many other porn related brain changes like desensitization. For me, a cure implies a beginning and an end though. A reboot at its core actually doesn't have an end - the real goal is to eliminate artificial stimulation (porn) from your life, which is best seen as a new lifestyle for the rest of your life. At some point you get healed by living your life without porn, not by just avoiding it for x amount of months.
grego said:
I'm going through this experience right now! It's definitely not fully understood yet. However, I think the general idea is that since we have been linking orgasms to pornography for so long in our lives that an orgasm, even with a partner, restimulates some of the porn pathways in our brain. It's important to remember that orgasms are powerful neurological events (lots of chemicals released), so the idea is they have the ability reactivate some "porn" parts of the brain if we aren't fully rebooted yet. The cure to the problem is simply more periods of no orgasm and (if you have one) rewiring with a partner. Long periods of no O + rewiring will slowly retrain the brain!
"Long periods of no O + rewiring will slowly retrain the brain!"
Which would be the best way to rewire with a girl?
1)Just spend time with her, hold hands, cuddle etc...no sex
2)Do the above, but add sex as well...without orgasm.
3) Cuddle, spent time, sex with orgasms
I know everyone's different...but this rewiring part is just a little confusing.
Which would be the best way to rewire with a girl?
1)Just spend time with her, hold hands, cuddle etc...no sex
2)Do the above, but add sex as well...without orgasm.
3) Cuddle, spent time, sex with orgasms
I know everyone's different...but this rewiring part is just a little confusing.
Imgunnabeathis
New Member
Ive abstained for almost 90 days and will continue up to the 6-7 month im moving in with my girl im sure shes gunna wanna get physical even though she knows about my problem. Im wondering sexy with o or no o. If i do go with karezza how long should i have sex like that?
Marko7776
Member
THIS IS BOTHERING ME TOO:
"
Which would be the best way to rewire with a girl?
1)Just spend time with her, hold hands, cuddle etc...no sex
2)Do the above, but add sex as well...without orgasm.
3) Cuddle, spent time, sex with orgasms
I know everyone's different...but this rewiring part is just a little confusing. "
"
Which would be the best way to rewire with a girl?
1)Just spend time with her, hold hands, cuddle etc...no sex
2)Do the above, but add sex as well...without orgasm.
3) Cuddle, spent time, sex with orgasms
I know everyone's different...but this rewiring part is just a little confusing. "