i want to be NORMAL !!!

I started a journal before but relapsed after 73 days and then a month un between of continuous fapping.. At this time am very dissapointed bcz i visited a prostitute the night before yesterday. And could?nt perform.. This was the third time i visited to a prostituted but not got a little erection... But i have a boy with which i do sex i think once a week and get an erection easily and i can also get erection with porn but still that erection does not last long if i continuously watch porn. So is this porn induced ed? i can also get a very mild erection after struggling 3-4 minutes with my hand and that goes down immedietly. So am i a homo-sexual? if so i hate to be. This is stupid Question but can i convert my self from homo sexual to straight sexual?? If so how??? plz i need answer to this Question and from the dissapointment i got from failed sex with the last prostitute i have thought to go through no PMO  may be it will help me in my case..  this is day 2 and am still dissapointed that why i could not get an erection with pristtute. One thing more that the prostitute puts pressure on me to be hurry  .is this is the reason of my failure . Please i have so much Questions popping up in my mind . Plz reply me fast as u can i this journal and the advises will be appreciated    am waiting BTW its day 2 !!

Much love !

AQiB

Plz for gods sake reply me.am.waiting

It is too early to have sex. Dont think about sex and pmo. Everything is okay. Dont be afraid you'll still like girls

really ????

its day 3 and i look at real girls sexually i mean i notice their sex parts like how big they are or how she will look naked.. this is frustrating me and really hate this thinking... hope it recovers through no pmo

i relapsed at edging .. feeling so disgusted. and seeking for a fresh start from.now ;(

Lovely. You need to stop everything sexual. EVERYTHING. Don't even think about it. No hookers, no fapping, no porn. Nothing.  Right now that stuff has got you hostage

yeah you are right jaystock. i will work on ur advice

Lvly,

You are more than a piece of flesh between your legs. You are more than what comes out of your pennis.

You are one of the greatest creatures in this planet, and you need to understand that society wants to make you feel and believe that you are what you can sexually perform or how much you have in your bank account.

Have you been educating yourself on www.yourbrainonporn.com ?

I believe it will do you a lot of good, because you need to understand this sick behavior that society teaches us to get.

Sex and sexuality are wonderful stuff. People who get paid to have sex are not much interested in people's feelings. They can't. Because they learned to turn off, so that they don't feel much - otherwise, they would have to stop lying to themselves that what they are doing (selling their bodies) is okay.

Have you been reading the other posts? Try to read some of them. I guess you will be able to relate with some and will see that you have similar issues and some of the other guys are coping and getting success.

Do you have any adult relative who you trust in and who you could open up? It helps a lot when you have someone to talk to, who can be there for you.

Of course, we are here, but the presence of someone you trust is fundamental, because these kinds of feelings and thoughts you are having can make you feel lonely and withdraw from people, because you may think that there is something wrong with you.

Even if you feel sexually atracted towards men - THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH YOU.

There is a huge difference between feelings and actions.

I know some guys who feel atracted by other guys, but CHOSE to be with women.

Most important of all is this: L.O.V.E. - yourself and others.

All this is my personal opinion and experience.

Above all, God has been a great help to get me from sick behaviors to choosing what is right for me and makes me happy. I don't know if you can relate to that, but spirituality plays a big role in recovery.

Wish you all the best, my dear virtual friend.

Read some of our posts - we are older than you, but we are fighting the same battle and against the same beast!

Greetings from sunny Brazil!

Lvly,
I hope you take Newborn's advice. Man knows what he is talking about. Every time I read a post of his it gives me confidence that I can one day get over this problem that we are all experiencing together. You should follow the same game plan I am trying to do. That is a 'Hard Mode Reboot' which means you have to go a specific amount of time (mine is 90 days) without PMO. That also means, no thinking about girls, try to limit the amount of times you touch yourself inadvertently, I know I do this quite often but as soon as I realize I stop immediately.
Don't worry about the thoughts you may have. My addiction is really bad with the amount of porn I would watch daily, and the type of things that began arousing me ON SCREEN. I was terrified that my feelings towards women will never be the same. But, after reading other people's posts that are similar to mine. I realized that this is just a symptom of Porn Induced Erectile Dysfunction (PIED) which I am quite sure that you are experiencing the same things that I have been. Stay strong, when ever you feel weak try your best to make a journal entry. It really does help just to vent your feelings, and we will all be here listening and helping you out !
I know within a year we will both be cured as long as we keep focus. It also helps having new hobbies to make up for the time you would use for porn. Most people on this site including myself try to incorporate working out in our daily lives now!

Lost Boy said:

Lvly,
I hope you take Newborn's advice. Man knows what he is talking about. Every time I read a post of his it gives me confidence that I can one day get over this problem that we are all experiencing together. You should follow the same game plan I am trying to do. That is a 'Hard Mode Reboot' which means you have to go a specific amount of time (mine is 90 days) without PMO. That also means, no thinking about girls, try to limit the amount of times you touch yourself inadvertently, I know I do this quite often but as soon as I realize I stop immediately.
Don't worry about the thoughts you may have. My addiction is really bad with the amount of porn I would watch daily, and the type of things that began arousing me ON SCREEN. I was terrified that my feelings towards women will never be the same. But, after reading other people's posts that are similar to mine. I realized that this is just a symptom of Porn Induced Erectile Dysfunction (PIED) which I am quite sure that you are experiencing the same things that I have been. Stay strong, when ever you feel weak try your best to make a journal entry. It really does help just to vent your feelings, and we will all be here listening and helping you out !
I know within a year we will both be cured as long as we keep focus. It also helps having new hobbies to make up for the time you would use for porn. Most people on this site including myself try to incorporate working out in our daily lives now!

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Wonderful words, Lost Boy!!!

It's amazing how mature you sound!!

Keep up the good work!

Lvly, I think Lost Boy is around the same age. He probably knows better than me what it is like to be in such a young age and have these issues to deal with because of PMO...

Remember to educate yourself through reading and viewing the videos. They really help.

Greeting from sunny Brazil!