Meant to post this too. I found this, ignore the God bit if you like, but the rest of it I found very helpful. I am not at all anti-God or christianity. I was brought up in a church with parents as ministers............but not into it all now after what I have seen and experienced. No offence to anyone who is into it, I just am not at this stage in life. Read this, cut and paste it and have it handy when you feel 'anxious' ;D
1) MOST IMPORTANT REALIZATION
We are only young for a short period of time! LIVE A GREAT AWESOME LIFE !
YOUTH IS FLEETING, If you haven't noticed by now, time runs FAST! Man it really does!
THE TIME IS NOW! WHEN WE GET OLDER LET THERE BE NO REGRET
REALLY THE SADDEST OF ALL EMOTIONS!
LIVE FULLY CONFIDENTLY PURELY , BE DISCIPLINED, FIGHT FOR GOOD,
DENY THE BAD, BE FOREVER WATCHFUL , BE VICTORIOUS , BE FREE, PURE,
HEALTHY, BRIGHT AND LOVE ALL THAT IS GOOD!
2) THE FOUNDATIONAL QUESTION:
HOW BAD IS IT TO RELAPSE JUST 1 MORE TIME?
OUR MINDS WORK VERY SUBTLY: "Ah, I'll just do it this time.. I've done it many times before,
this is just 1 more.. let me just do it now, and sometime later I will really stop.. etc.. "
SO , 1 RELAPSE.
Can't be that bad right?
Just 1 RELAPSE. What is it?
1 RELAPSE = creates a spiral of 1 relapses , where you can not stop! Because you always justify it as just 1 relapse
1 RELAPSE = CAN LEAD TO YEARS OF ADDITIONAL STRUGGLE! 1 relapse is not just 1 relapse. IT CAN WASTE YOU YEARS!
1 RELAPSE = it destroys much of your progress. It is wasting time. it will take weeks or months to get back to that level.
And it will happen again and again. Time is the most precious thing you got!!!! AND IT IS LIMITED!!!!
TIME IS THE KEY! IT RUNS FAST!
1 relapse is all it takes to waste years repeating the same mistake..
Let's say our best years are from 18 - 35 (in terms of energy, dating, life excitement, building character...)
So many men flush all of their best years down the toilet! Don't "ENJOY STUPIDLY" YOU ARE DIGGING A HOLE! STOP!
TREASURE YOUR LIFE! TREASURE YOUR TIME!
1 RELAPSE = What this is all about. Just take care of that 1! DO NOT DO IT!
3) RULES TO OBEY
1) CURIOSITY IS NOT ALLOWED TO BE ACTED UPON!
"Let me look just a little" is NOT ALLOWED!
Practicing this will make your mind stop being curious automatically
after you've successfully done it a couple of times.
NEVER DO ANY CLICK ON YOUR COMPUTER THAT IS IN THE DIRECTION OF LUST.
The little clicks of curious wondering are deadly. Don't! Just ignore your curiosity. Let it go.
2) When you feel LUST / TEMPTATION TO PMO IMMEDIATELY DENY IT! SAY NO!
Say it with POWER! Imagine throwing that lustful ugly feelings out.
You will never beat porn if you don't do the difficult! Deny it!
This is YOU, YOUR LIFE, wake up! Be STRONG!
And THE MOST IMPORTANT THING ABOUT ALL OF THIS IS, WITH GOING AGAINST YOUR SELF AGAINST
"BAD DESIRES" AND CHOOSING BETTER THINGS, YOU WILL CHANGE YOURSELF A LITTLE BIT.
YOU WILL BECOME ONE DEGREE MORE OF WHO YOU WANT TO BE.
In time you change so much, PMO is the furthest thing from your mind.
3) CATCH THE TEMPTATION EARLY! IMMEDIATELY!! GET INTO A NEW MIND-STATE
THIS ONE IS SOOOO IMPORTANT. If you are too late, porn will overpower you.
The urges will build , DO NOT LET THAT HAPPEN. RE-FOCUS your thoughts. RE-EVALUATE your life plan.
GO OUTSIDE. A walk, or jogging or prayer or cold shower or call a friend etc. Wash "bad thoughts" off of you.
4.) DONT JUSTIFY DOING IT.
If you decided to not do that, don't do it. NO JUSTIFYING! EVER! If you
fail there is 100% chance of regret. There is no one final time to do it. There is no comparing yourself to
others.. there is no this temptation is too strong .. NOTHING! JUST DON'T DO IT.
This one is soooo snekay. Your mind will tell you well you can start this no porn thing at some other time again..
And many other tricks. Really just become aware of your thoughts and feelings and realize you are often
subconscioulsy JUSTIFYING things you WANT but logically know that are BAD.
5) FORGET AND IGNORE WHAT YOU ARE FIGHTING AGAINST, WHEN THERE IS NO TEMPTATION
JUST LIKE IF YOU DON'T HAVE AN ADDICTION TO HARD DRUGS. YOU WONT REALLY BE THINKING ABOUT THEM TOO MUCH.
BUT THERE ARE STRONG DECISIONS INSIDE OF YOU THAT YOU KNOW YOU WON'T DO THEM IF YOU EVER HAD THE CHANCE.
IGNORE THE BAD. REDIRECT YOUR THOUGHTS. If case of dreams and images and thoughts
hitting us , do not dwell on them, but simply sort of push them aside and ignore them.
Immediately take a deep breath and direct your attention elsewhere.
6) READ YOUR LIST OF RULES REGULARLY!
READ AND RE-READ AND RECOMMIT TO THE PROCESS! Internalize the "rules".
4) BONUS TIPS:
REMEMBER YOUR PAST. REMEMBER WHAT FAILURE DOES! HOW BAD YOU FELT! WRITE IT DOWN!
We are so quick to forget! Please do that! Don't be reminded at a relapse. Be forewarned.
One of the problems is , in the heated moments you may not want porn lust to leave you.
And if you wait, the feeling will overwhelm you and you will be powerless. The only way is to SAY NO EARLY EARLY EALRY!!!
And it helps to say NO if you know WHY you have to say NO. This is it. Have the reasons in your mind.
Once the temptation hits, they will not be found in your head, unless you have them prepared in advance.
WHEN THE URGES HIT, THINK ONLY ABOUT WHAT HAPPENS AFTER YOU RELAPSE
YOU ARE LOST AND DEFEATED
AND YOU LOSE POWER , LOSE CONFIDENCE ETC.
SO CHANGE IT! 1 HOUR later, you'll be smiling and be happy that you did not relapse.
Don't look back 5 years from now in utter defeat. DON'T DO IT. That is the only key to success. DO NOT DO IT.
RECORD YOUR BENEFITS OF SUCCESS
There will be many.
NO EXCUSES! You are choosing between REGRET and VICTORY!
You can do it.
But all the past experiences have brainwashed us into thinking
it's harder than it actually is. We remember failing, but don't remember
that we could easily have chosen not to do it. This is 100% in your control.
HAVE CONFIDENCE
5) LORD AND SAVIOR JESUS CHRIST
This is NUMBER 1 reason I am where I am.
I wanted to do EVIL. But God helped me. The Word of God anchors me. And I can not be shaken as easily as before.
God takes your heart and purifies it, cleanses it, and gives you a new heart.
Do not look at other people, supposed Christians and then judge Christ or God based on them. None of the Christians represents Christ as they should because none is perfect. But not only that VAST majority of "Christians" are NOT even Christians. Read the NEW TESTAMENT - 4 GOSPELS (Matthew, Mark, Luke, John). Or just read 1 Gospel (It's like 30 pages) IT IS SHORT! BUT IT CONTAINS LIFE! After reading that, you will see what it means to be a Christian. It is LOVE , HOLINESS, OBEDIENCE, PURITY...
Turning to God in prayer,
turning to Jesus,
HE LIVES.
It is always our free will,
and He always receives
the humble, and sincere.
IF you seek, you WILL find.
I personally testify , that God LOVES us, and that he is willing to help, BUT , under HIS CONDITIONS! Not our own. We are FREE to listen to the EVIL or to GOD. We can do whatever we want. IN THE END WE WILL REAP ETERNALLY what WE SOWED in our flesh.
I love beatitudes, found in the Gospel of Matthew:
Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.
Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth.
Blessed are those who hunger and thirst after righteousness,for they will be filled.
Blessed are the merciful, for they shall be shown mercy.
Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God.
Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called the sons of God.
Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me. Rejoice and be glad, because great is your reward in heaven, for in the same way they persecuted the prophets who were before you.
search youtube for Paul Washer, Tim Conway, Bill Larkin ... and many others.. , then go into prayer mode
WISH YOU ALL THE BEST!