Doing well but its easier at the moment.

Boris741

Member
Since the infection hit in the uk Ive found it incredibly stressful mainly because of worrying about members of my family. Its got easier the last couple of weeks as Ive got used to the situation.
On the plus side Ive not relapsed since all this has started and have been clean now for about 38 days.
I accept that were in a unique situation though, I dont have anytime to myself and rarely think about porn.
 

ShadeTrenicin

Well-Known Member
Hi Boris,

welcome to the forum and good that you havent relapsed!

The situation indeed is very stressful and as you described we can get used to it.

Please post as much on here as you feel is needed so that it can help you stay PMO free!

 

Andrew1973

Active Member
Welcome Boris (You're not THE Boris from London are you?! ;-) )

38 days is a great achievement - don't deny yourself the self recognition just because your house is full and you're not getting a minute to yourself (some for me here!) It' still a great achievement.

My view was that lockdown was a unique opportunity to finally put my 25+ year addiction behind me, so I came here a fortnight ago. Even though the forum is reportedly very quiet at the moment according to some of the guys that have been around longer than me, I've found it an invaluable outlet - a pace where I can be honest, open, receive encouragement and support, and do my bit in encouraging and supporting others. You're very welcome here.

My tip as a recent newcomer would be to read some of the other users journals - it's really interesting to see commonalities with others, and also some of the differences. Whatever people's backgrounds, beliefs, particular preferences, the thing that unites us all is the awareness that we have an addiction, and a determination to take practical steps to overcome it.

All the best
 

joepanic

Respected Member
Hey Boris

    Werlcome to the forum  I would put in more  but UkGuy  pretty much gave you the gist of it.  Nice going on 38 days  perhaps the only thing I can add is it your willing to give your story  how long you have been an addict  etc  Most of the guys really found that helps as  others can give advice  to help you along the way

    Cheers

    Post often it helps me it helps you
 
N

Numez

Guest
38 days is great achievement, you are on a great path. trust me, if you can take a shit or take a shower, you have more than plenty of time and opportunity to relapse. not having time for relapse  is pretty impossible considering todays access to high speed internet on our phones. so stay sharp, dont bring your phone into bathroom and keep thinking well for others, that is good!
 

Boris741

Member
Thanks,
Well basically ive been an addict for the best part of 25 years, had periods off it but always went back to it.
This is the longest streak I can remember, ive been better the last year or so, havent had that zombie feeling nowhere near as much.
Ive been with my girlfriend for over 6 years and obviously it has affected our sex life, but im starting to feel better and have been using some pills which I bought from amazon which help aswell.
Obviously this is still a work in progress but its a start.
 

Andrew1973

Active Member
Good to see you back Boris - sorry to hear that the wheels came off? What do you think happened? ....
- what were the triggers to your relapse? emotional and physical?
- did behaviour leading up to the relapse escalate? Small temptations and 'peeking' that gained momentum?
- what lessons were there from your streak that you can take into your renewed challenge, and what lessons were there from your slip that you can use to strengthen your plan?
Wishing you the best.
 
J

J01

Guest
Congratulations on this decision to make a new commitment to the battle.  Put in a few clean days and the confidence and clear thinking will come back.  Best wishes moving forward and I hope you check in regularly with updates, rain or shine!   
 

Boris741

Member
Thanks guys, I know I need to check in more often and I plan to do just that.
Solitude is always the main cause of my relapsing especially if im a bit down about things.
Any glancing leads to more, discipline is always the key to overcoming this.
 

alamar365

Member
Hello Boris. I just saw your post so this a belated "welcome" and best wishes for success in overcoming the addiction. One suggestion: if you haven't done so already, I recommend you go to the "Porn Addiction" category in the Forum section and read through the first highlighted post at the very beginning by William entitled, "Hello gentlemen, now we begin..." The insights are priceless.
 

Boris741

Member
Thanks alamar, ive been struggling for about a week or so but came here rather than go elsewhere.
I read that post you suggested and will try to continue to refer to that thread.
I am in the first group at the moment, hopefully in time I can get into the second group.
I will try to post back within the next couple of days.
 

Boris741

Member
I am on my own at home for 3 or 4 hours today, these are the times when I'm at my most vulnerable which is why I came here.
 

Andrew1973

Active Member
Great news - well done Boris. For me, I find coming on here daily essential, and effective (I have not relapsed since starting this aspect of my plan). It needn't take long, but I find it a really healthy habit that boosts my motivation and self esteem. That's not to say one size fits all, but it can't do any harm! Take care.
 

Boris741

Member
Thanks ukguy, checking in again today.
Reading many posts on here has made me more aware of my triggers, it is more the thought processes which stem from the triggers.
Its summer in the uk and Im starting to become aware of how many women I look at whilst driving/walking around, Ive been a bit more in control because of this the past few days.
 

Boris741

Member
Things are still going well, I?m trying to be aware of my thoughts and trying to not think about things that can cause me problems.
 

Boris741

Member
Ive had a tough couple of days and need to refocus.
Things were going well but obviously I need to change my approach.
 

Andrew1973

Active Member
Be patient and kind with yourself Boris. You're here and you're committed. That's a significant foundation.
I'm not sure what a tough couple of days means - is that a relapse or just strong battles? If the former, my advice would be to always take a learning out of each relapse - that way you're continuing to improve, and although the line may be bumpy, the trend remains positive. If the latter, stick in there - we're all with you and wishing you well.
Have a good weekend.
 
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