Some progress

Last night (Day 83) a girl came over. I thought I had reached 90 days, but that was a miscalculation smh. However, I had no problem performing which was amazing. After she wanted to go again, she was pretty aggressive and I was feeling pretty much numb (especially after having my first orgasm in 80 plus days). I don't know how much time went by but it felt like forever. I don't know how rebooting is supposed to impact your refractory period but I feel like this is a sign that I still have a ways to go. I felt some anxiety and then finally (maybe after an hour) I was able to go again and it was great. She was up to go again but I felt like I was tapped out. In the morning I felt slightly back to normal and was able to go again but ended up going soft towards the end.

I feel like this was a great step forward but feeling numb after the first time and her wanting to go again and it taking a while really reminded me of how I was feeling towards the beginning of this whole experience. I hope I have allowed myself enough time to seriously reboot. I hope I don't have much longer to go before I can be in these situations without second guessing how my body may respond.

Hi Lem,

Congratulations for this. It?s really good to be able to have sex after 83 days, really. But depending on your history with porn, 90 days might not be enough for a reboot. Some guys say it took them 9 months, or 18 months. I even read the story of a guy who took 2 years to reboot. I hope for you it doesn?t take that long, but it might take longer for you to heal. Of course, the refractory period is affected by the reboot: when you are healed, it will be shorter. I can only recommend to be patient. As I said, it?s good that you could have sex after 83 days. Congratulations on this, and good luck for your reboot.

I'm on day 213, masturbated for the first time in 209 days on said day, just cuz I needed the release. Fantasized about a real life encounter with an ex, and just got it over with quickly, prob less than 5 mins, didn't even wait to see if I could get fully erect.

Reboot has been weird so far. I was "healed" enough over a year ago to masturbate to just my imagination, but discovered that that apparently counts as artificial stimulus also, so went back to rebooting.

Likewise, some 110 days into reboot this time I was able to gain erection with just using my hands, no fantasy, but that went away again after about 14 days.

Well done, just don't let yourself go back to porn, don't get complacent.

My first reboot was in 2014, and it was a great success, but despite having plenty of action, by the end of the year I was back on porn, just because I liked using it and got complacent with it. Being trying to get off it since, so don't go letting your mind fool yourself that after the reboot, you can begin to use again "safely".

Hey @Mookie6092,

I know its been some time. Just wanted to say thanks for the response and sharing your experience. "Don't get complacent" is really the biggest thing. Beating porn and the effects it has on you is really a 24/7 battle. When you think you've won, you haven't, its always there lurking...so keep working!

Good luck bro!

After that experience I wrote about in June. I got alot of confidence and the summer time was really great for me. Then I think I got a little too confident. I got on Tinder/Hinged and connected with an old fling. One thing lead to another and I ended up getting some nudes sent to me. I was so confident in my reboot that I didn't think that this might be a harmful form of stimulation for me.

Following that, I've noticed in the past 3-4 weeks I've been feeling kind of numbish again and my body isn't responding how I was mid summer. Its pretty deflating. I feel like its back to step one, all though I know its not really step one because I've come so far. I'm just so ready for this not to be a part of my life. I feel like I'm putting things on hold while I battle this -- and I've been battling this for so long already. Really frustrating.

This time I can just notice all the things that use to plague me before and the anxiety I feel when I'm around a woman who I know is interested in me in a way that would lead to things getting intimate. I feel like I have to hide out for the next few months and just allow myself to heal fully. SMH. Maybe I'll talk to a therapist as well to have a sounding board.